


Speak of the Devil and You Walk In

by imfuckingnertz



Category: Booksmart (2019)
Genre: Drama, F/F, Pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-25
Updated: 2019-08-18
Packaged: 2020-05-19 19:29:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 40,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19362916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imfuckingnertz/pseuds/imfuckingnertz
Summary: AU in which Hope expresses interest in Amy at the //beginning// of their senior year. Complications arise.





	1. Meet Me in the Gender Neutral Bathroom

Hope sat at her desk, flipping through the pages of To Kill A Mockingbird and underlining words and phrases at random. Every few pages, she added a few question marks or exclamation points. Though she had done the assigned reading the night before, she forgot that they were supposed to turn in annotations until she saw it written on the whiteboard at the front of the room. In an attempt to make up for not actually annotating the text, she wrote a short analysis in the margins of the last page. When she was finished, she leaned back in her chair, just in time for Amy Anstler and her best friend, Molly Davidson, to walk into the room with the energy of two nuclear bombs. The two girls were engaged in a spirited conversation about hydraulic fracking and its impact on the environment. Hope opened her book again, staring at the wooden pencil sitting between the pages. 

“So, they didn’t say that there were no environmental impacts, they just said that the environmental impact wouldn’t be significant,” Amy said, setting her bag down on the floor next to her desk. 

Molly sat in the seat on the other side of Amy and shook her head as she said, “Well, that’s a load of bullshit.”

Amy slumped over in her seat, elbows on her desk, and rested her chin on her hands. Hope looked over at them, listening closely as Amy continued. “Like maybe the environmental impact is insignificant to some guy that could potentially drop dead any minute, but –” 

Hope turned in her seat and leaned across the aisle, gently touching Amy’s back to get her attention. “Hey, Amy,” She said. 

Amy looked over her shoulder then spun around to face Hope. “Yeah?” She asked.

“What’s more environmentally friendly: a wooden pencil or a mechanical pencil?” Hope twirled her own pencil between her fingers. 

Amy furrowed her eyebrows, unsure of whether Hope’s question was genuine or not. Molly leaned over her desk to get a look at Hope from over Amy’s shoulder; she made eye contact with Hope, giving her a suspicious expression. Hope ignored it. She guessed that Molly couldn’t go two seconds without interacting with Amy because it would force her to be alone with her own thoughts for once.

Oblivious to this exchange, Amy said, “Well, uh...I guess they might have an equal carbon footprint in the grand scheme of things. Wooden pencils are technically made from a renewable resource, but we don’t plant enough trees to make up for the ones that we use, and mechanical pencils are made out of plastic.”

“So it doesn’t matter?” Hope asked. Molly watched the interaction with intense eyes, biting on the middle knuckle of her index finger. 

“Well, in the grand scheme of things, pencils don’t really harm the environment that much, but I still buy the ones that are made out of recycled materials,” Amy said as she pulled her books out of her backpack, along with a pencil. She handed it to Hope. 

“Thanks,” Hope said as she took the pencil from the girl. 

Amy nodded and began to turn back to Molly when Hope didn’t say anything else.

Hope cleared her throat and tilted her head to the side before saying, “So, did you like the reading last night?” She rubbed the back of her neck. This interaction wasn’t going as smooth as Hope had anticipated. Molly flashed a glare in Hope’s direction.

Amy spun back around and said, “Oh yeah, definitely. It’s a classic. I don’t know why I haven’t read it before.”

“Yeah, it’s kind of right up your alley, isn’t it? The whole social justice thing?”

Amy smiled and looked down at her shoes. “Yeah, I guess.” 

“Cause you go to like, protests and stuff?” 

“Mhm,” Amy hummed. “Actually this past weekend, I was downtown protesting the –”

“Amy, we get it! You’re socially active. Do we all have to listen to you talk about it because the log in the corner decided she wanted to interact today?” George said as he walked into the room and passed through the sea of desks.

“Did you just call me a log?” Hope asked. 

“Don’t take it personally,” Alan said, following George down the aisle. “He woke up late and didn’t get to listen to the entirety of the Dear Evan Hansen soundtrack to start his day.” George gave them all an unpleasant look as he put a pair of airpods in his ears and sat down. “He’s only at Sincerely, Me,” Alan added, inhaling deeply. “It’s gonna be a long day.”

“I have no idea what any of that means,” Hope said. “But if he calls me a log again, I’m gonna kick his ass.” Alan sat down next to George and shrugged at her.

“I wouldn’t say a log. She’s more like a lamp post. What do you think, Ames?” Molly chimed in. 

Amy turned back to look at her friend, confused. “I mean, generally speaking, I don’t think anyone is a lamp post…” The bell signaling the beginning of third period rang as Amy trailed off.

“Okay, enough,” Miss Ramos said as she stood up from her desk. “George – airpods out. Everyone – pass your books to the front.” 

“Sorry, what did you just say? I can’t hear you over your teacher’s salary,” George said.

“We are not doing this today, George. Take them out or I’ll make sure you’re not cast as Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz next spring.”

George just shook his head as he obeyed. “The things we do for the role of a lifetime,” He grumbled.

Everyone passed their books up to the front of the room, and Miss Ramos jumped into her lesson plans for the day. Molly glanced over at Hope and pulled a pad of sticky notes out of her bag. She scribbled something down and crumpled the note up in her hands, then she threw it at Hope while Amy wasn’t paying attention. It hit Hope on the cheek and fell to the floor. She looked over at Molly and mouthed “What the fuck?” Molly placed her index finger in front of her lips. Hope picked up the note and read it: Meet me in the gender neutral bathroom in 5. Follow my lead.

Molly raised her hand. “Miss Ramos, may I use the bathroom?” She asked.

“Take the pass. Be quick,” Miss Ramos said. Molly got up from her seat and grabbed the bathroom pass, turning to look at Hope before she left.

After a few minutes passed, Hope just stood up and said, “I’m leaving for an unspecified amount of time” and made her way to the bathroom, where Molly was waiting for her, arms crossed. 

“So, what’s the deal?” Molly asked.

“What’s the deal with what?”

“What are your intentions with Amy?”

“I..was having a conversation with her.”

“Okay, but you wanted nothing to do with her or me or literally anyone else at this school up until like two weeks ago.”

“Get to the point. Everyone in class thinks you’re taking the longest shit of the century right now,” Hope said. 

“Are you leading her on as some sort of weird joke or do you legitimately like her? Because if it’s the former, I’m gonna need you to back the fuck off.”

Hope rolled her eyes. “Are you mad at me for being nice?” She asked.

“Yes, exactly,” Molly exclaimed. “Not once in all of the years that we’ve gone to school together have you ever extended any sort of kindness toward us. But recently I’ve just noticed you staring at the back of Amy’s head whenever you get the chance.”

“I don’t stare at the back of her head.”

“Yes you do.

“Only if it disrupts my line of vision, as it does in Miss Ramos’ class.”

“So you’ll admit it?” 

“Admit what?”

“That you legitimately like Amy.”

Hope let out a small breath that wasn’t quite a laugh, though it was obvious that’s how she wanted Molly to interpret it. “Well, does Amy like me?” She meant for it to sound a lot less sentimental than how it came out. 

Molly’s expression softened as she witnessed what almost appeared to be tenderness flash across Hope’s face. “Oh okay, so that’s where we’re at.”

“Look, don’t say anything to anybody about this because I will literally beat your ass, Davidson.”

“So you like Amy’s face? You would like to kiss her on the mouth and vagina?” Molly laughed and clasped her hands together. “Who knew I would become a teenage lesbian matchmaker?” 

Hope’s eyes widened as her face heated up. “Alright. This conversation is officially over. I’m going back to class,” She said as she walked out of the bathroom.

“Wait,” Molly said as she followed Hope into the hallway. “She’s going to a protest this Saturday. Tell her that you heard about it and were thinking of going to it.”

“I’m not big on lots of people crowded into one space,” Hope said.

“Well, I’m sure you’ll be happy to be smushed up against Amy. Boob to boob. Plus, aren’t you like a hipster photography babe? You can say you want to go to take pictures.”

“Alright,” Hope said. “Text me the details, and don’t talk to me for the rest of the day.”

“Perfect. Love it.”

//

On the outskirts of the courtyard, Molly and Amy sat together at their usual table for lunch. Molly munched on baby carrots while Amy finished up the last bite of her sandwich. 

“So what’s up with Hope being friendly all of a sudden?” Molly asked.

Amy shrugged. “Maybe she got tired of being too cool for everybody.”

“I feel like I don’t really know anything about her, and we’ve gone to school with her since we were like five. Isn’t that sad?”

“Yeah, but to be fair, she called me a naked mole rat once in second grade.” Amy chuckled as she got up to throw away her trash. “I have never recovered from that emotionally,” She said, brushing her hands on her jeans and returning to her seat. 

Molly snorted. “Maybe we should give her a chance. Who knows, maybe Hope is secretly into documentaries about the Protestant Reformation.”

“God, could you imagine?” Amy said, shaking her head. “Too bad she’s too hot to care about anything other than making sure everyone else knows it.” 

“Mmmmmmm, hold up, Ames,” Molly said, tilting her head to the side. “Let’s pause for a second. Did I hear that correctly? Did you just say you think that Hope, as in Called You A Naked Mole Rat in Second Grade Hope, is hot?”

Before Amy could reply, Jared pulled into the parking lot adjacent to their lunch table. He rolled down the window and pulled his sunglasses down to sit low on the bridge of his nose. “Heeeeey Molly and Amy!” 

“Jesus Christ,” Molly muttered. “Why? What have I done to deserve the hypebeast’s attention?”

Jared jumped out of the driver’s seat and made his way over to their table. “Molly. Amy. Molls and Ames. How y’all doing? You doing good? You wouldn’t believe the traffic getting here. Absolutely nertz.” 

“We’re fabulous, Jared. What do you want?” Molly asked. 

“Oh you know, just wanted to see how your day’s going,” He said. “You going to the Student Council meeting tonight?”

“I have to,” Molly said. “I’m the President. I preside over the meetings.”

“Yeah, I was just thinking I might join for the hell of it, you know? I could be treasurer.”

“I’m actually the treasurer, so. Maybe not,” Amy said.

“Remember when we had elections at the end of the year?” Molly asked.

“I actually have no recollection of that,” Jared said. “Must’ve been out doing..cool shit...on my yacht.” 

Molly nodded. “Impressive.”

“Oh, shit. I just remembered that Gigi told me she wanted to ride all the way here in the trunk, so I’m actually gonna go let her out,” Jared said, backing away from the lunch table. “So, I’ll see you both tonight at the Student Council meeting. Molly, save me a seat.”

“I won’t do that.”

“Great!’ He said before he turned and sprinted back to his car. He ran around the back of the vehicle and popped open the trunk. “Oh jeez, she got out.”

“Well, I’m not gonna lie, that’s a little disturbing,” Amy said as she watched Jared reach around in the trunk to see if Gigi was hiding from him. 

“Oh, don’t think that the conversation has changed, my sweet, sweet pup,” Molly said. “Let’s talk about this Hope thing.”

“What Hope thing?” Amy asked, furrowing her eyebrows.

“Maybe the part where you said she was hot? Let’s try to elaborate on that. Do you like her?”

Amy scrunched up her nose and shook her head. “No. Finding someone attractive is not the same as liking them. I will die on this hill.”

“Yes, but finding someone attractive is a prerequisite to liking them.”

“Well, call me a hater, but I really don’t see a point in liking someone who doesn’t really like anyone else.”

“I think there’s a lot going on there that we don’t know about, though,” Molly said.

“That’s fair.”


	2. Taco Night Fever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! WOW I did not expect so much support right off the bat. Y'all are awesome lol. Thank you to everyone who read and left comments u filled my little heart w so much love !! Also if u want to follow me on tumblr @imfuckingnertz for more booksmart stuff and my crackheadery feel free! Also this chapter is super long hopefully it's not boring lol

In the upper level of the library, Hope made a beeline for a desk in the corner, next to an open window. Molly had texted her that she and Amy had a Student Council meeting after school, so Hope had decided to wait around for a little while before heading home. She pulled a book out of her backpack: a collection of Raymond Carver’s short stories. She began to read, but the commotion outside pulled her attention away from the pages. She stared out the window, down at all of the bodies leaving in cars, on buses, on foot, and in Ryan and Tanner’s case, on skateboards. Hope rarely stayed after school, and a lot of times, her car was the first out of the parking lot, so this was a new perspective. She didn’t hate it. Just before Hope could begin to reflect on not being involved at school, several familiar voices made themselves known. Hope figured they must be having the meeting downstairs. She listened, but didn’t turn her head from the window.

 

“So, I want to make this meeting as brief and pleasant as possible for all parties involved because we all have better things to be doing,” Molly began. 

 

“Aw, come on Molls,” Jared said. “Loosen up. Let’s have some fun with it.”

 

There was a short lull in the conversation. Hope assumed that Molly was collecting her rage and shoving it deep down inside herself. 

 

“Okay, I’ve come up with a new rule. Jared, you’re not allowed to speak unless spoken to,” Molly said.

 

“Aye aye cap’n!” Jared said.

 

“Jared, what did I just say?”

 

“To be fair, you were speaking  _ to  _ me.”

 

“Rhetorical question,” Molly said. “Anyway, obviously we’re all in charge of planning the Homecoming dance.” Hope heard a few groans, and was amused at the fact that even the nerds who planned it knew that Homecoming was the lamest school event of the year. 

 

An obviously upset Amy decided to speak up. “Wow,” She said. “Homecoming haters in Student Council? First of all, if you think Homecoming is lame, then you obviously don’t remember last year when Molly and I did Monica and Ross’s routine from  _ Friends _ .”

 

“Flawlessly,” Molly added.

 

“Exactly. It was...an amazing night.” There was a short silence, and Hope deduced that Molly and Amy were just staring into each others eyes as they sometimes do. Amy continued, “But secondly, we are the ones who plan Homecoming. We are working within the system that produces what  _ some _ people think is a mediocre dance. So, you can either work to make Homecoming whatever you want it to be or you can be quiet.”

 

“That was beautiful, Amy. Thank you so much. You look gorgeous today by the way,” Molly said. “Anyway, we have some decisions to make. We’ve got three themes that have been pre-approved by Principal Brown. I’ll let you know that I advocated for both the French Revolution and Grey’s Anatomy, but apparently those – and I quote – ‘aren’t real themes.’”

 

“This is why Homecoming has the worst rep,” Amy said. “They always play it safe when it comes to the theme.” Hope chuckled to herself as she listened; Amy was such a nerd.

 

“But lucky for us, the themes we have to choose from have tons of potential. So, Jared, I’m gonna cautiously ask you for a drum roll. No speaking. Just a short drum roll.”

 

Hope heard the sound of Jared’s hands coming down on the table in a beat that got progressively faster and then suddenly stopped altogether.

 

 “Alright! Our themes are Disco Fever, Wild Wild West, and Punk Party,” Molly said.

 

At this point, Hope had grown tired of sitting still just listening. She had gotten up after collecting her belongings and made her way over to the railing to look down at the small group. Leaning against the railing with her typical aloof composure, she took advantage of the silence to say, “Can I vote?”

 

All of the heads in the group swiveled her way. She only bothered to look at Molly, considering the question was for her. Molly was not-so-subtly losing her mind over the pure swagger of Hope’s entrance. Molly looked at the rest of the students that sat around the table, her eyes lingering on Amy’s face a little longer to analyze her reaction. “Well, this day just continues to surprise me,” She said. “This is amazing. Does anyone object to Hope casting a vote as a Student Liaison?”

 

Jared raised his hand.

 

“Jared, you’re not on Student Council. You can’t object to anything.”

 

“I think we should give a vote to Jared to make it fair. I mean, if we’re letting Hope vote,” Amy said. She hated to be an antagonist, but Hope had been lingering around in her conversations and in her mind too much today, and she didn’t like it. Jared smiled at Amy and gave her two thumbs up to which Amy half-smiled and gave much less enthusiastic finger guns. 

 

Molly threw her hands up in the air. “Rules to the wind. Jared and Hope get votes. Let’s start with Amy and go around the table.”

 

Amy scoffed and slapped the table with her palm. “Easy. I vote Disco Fever.” 

 

Molly counted the votes as they went around the table. 

 

“I vote Disco, too.” 

 

“I vote Punk Party.”

 

“Disco Fever.”

 

“Wild West.” 

 

Molly looked up at Hope for her vote. Hope smirked as she said, “Disco obviously.” She made brief eye contact with Amy, who gave her a polite smile and turned her gaze away as quickly as it came. Hope couldn’t gauge what was going on in the other girl’s head, which concerned her a bit because she’s never looked at Amy’s face and not known what her mood was. The girl was generally easy to read.  

 

“I vote Disco,” Jared said when it was his turn. “And I also want you to know that I can DJ the whole thing free of charge. Just for you, Molls.”

 

“We can talk specifics at the next meeting,” Molly said as she checked her watch. “But I’m happy to announce that disco queens will rise at this year’s Homecoming dance, and now I’m letting all of you run free.” 

 

By the time Hope made it downstairs, Molly and Amy were the only ones left at the table. Hope was pretty sure Molly was packing up her things just slow enough to allow the following interaction to happen because as soon as Hope got near the table, Molly excused herself to go to the bathroom.

 

“Hey,” Hope said to Amy as they both watched Molly leave. 

 

“Uh, Hey,” Amy said. She shoved her hand in her pockets. Molly always chose the worst times to leave her alone with strangers. “It feels like you’re showing up everywhere today,” She said.

 

Hope raised an eyebrow. “Really? I feel like I only saw you in class…”

 

Amy froze. She was so caught up in her own mind that she forgot having thoughts about another person was different than actually interacting with them. “I, um,” She stuttered, feeling her heart jump right into her throat. As per usual, Amy didn’t know what to say. She didn’t want Hope to know that she had been thinking about her because she knew it would go straight to the other girl’s head. The last thing she wanted was for Hope to think that she liked her. Because she didn’t like Hope, at least that’s what she’d been telling herself since Molly brought the subject up at lunch. “Well, I, uh, I was just surprised to see you here. I didn’t think you stayed after school, like...ever.”

 

Hope shrugged. “Maybe you need to pay more attention.”

 

“Ah, right…” Amy nodded and slung her backpack over one shoulder. She pursed her lips and looked down at her feet. 

 

“Sorry. I didn’t mean that to sound bitchy,” Hope said.

 

Amy chuckled nervously and looked up at the girl. “I mean, I’ve seen you in the halls at the end of the day literally knocking people over to get out. At this point, ‘Hope peacing out’ is a class meme. Every time we hear tires squealing on the pavement, we know you’re gone.”

 

Hope laughed and rolled her eyes. “You know, people exaggerate.”

 

“The tire squealing is definitely not an exaggeration. You can ask Molly.”

 

“I’ll take your word for it,” Hope said. 

 

“You should. My word is unimpeachable.” 

 

“Right,” Hope said, scrunching up her nose and nodding. “But, um, speaking of impeachment, did you hear about that protest going on this weekend at City Hall?”

 

Amy nodded. “Yeah, uh, I’m actually going to that one.”

 

“Would you care if I tagged along?” Hope asked. “I’m trying something new for my photography class, and I’m not protest savvy.”

 

Amy could feel her face beginning to turn red. She felt stupid for not seeing it before. These few interactions were just laying the groundwork of a superficial friendship before Hope asked for her help. She would probably go back to not even looking in Amy’s direction next week. This actually made Amy feel better in a way. “I mean, sure. As long as you take a couple of pictures of me looking like a badass.”

 

“Somehow I can’t picture you as a badass,” Hope teased.

 

Amy smiled. “Wait ‘til you meet my protest-sona.”

 

“Oh god.” Hope rolled her eyes.

 

“I’m kidding. Protest-sonas aren’t a thing. Well, now that I just made it up, someone could potentially –”

 

“Okay nerd,” Hope interrupted, laughing. “Do you wanna, like, make posters or something before Saturday?”

 

Amy nodded. “Sure! Actually, if you want to come over, I was planning on making mine tonight anyway.”

 

Hope tilted her head to the side and shrugged. “Okay.”

 

//

 

“I leave to go to the bathroom for  _ five minutes _ and suddenly Hope is following us to your house to hang out and make posters for a protest?” Molly said as she shut the passenger door of Amy’s old Volvo after she got in. 

 

“We’re just making posters. No one said anything about hanging out,” Amy said as she buckled her seatbelt. 

 

“Interaction is hanging out, Amy. Keep up,” Molly replied as the other girl pulled out of the Class President parking spot. “Besides, can’t we celebrate the fact that the hot girl from English wants to go to a protest with you?”

 

“It’s for a class,” Amy said, shaking her head. 

 

“Amy, I’ve never seen you so resistant to anything in my life,” Molly said, sighing as she sat back in her seat. “What’s the deal, pup?”

 

Amy bit down on her bottom lip before speaking. “You know, last year the whole thing with Ryan really messed me up. I don’t want to like someone who’s unattainable again.” 

 

“I think it’s safe to say that Hope is into girls, if that’s what you’re worried about,” Molly said, laughing. “I mean...that jacket? Come on.”

Amy smiled slightly and shrugged. “I mean unattainable in other ways.”

 

“Ames,” Molly said, shifting in her seat to look directly at her best friend in the world. “You always see the good in people. I don’t want you to let what happened with Ryan turn you cold. I think you should give Hope  _ some _ benefit of the doubt.” 

 

Amy thought about Molly’s words for a moment. In theory, the girl was right. Amy was being uncharacteristically cynical about the situation. As she pulled into the driveway of her parent’s house, she nodded. “You’re right. I barely know her, and I shouldn’t judge,” She said as she parked. 

 

Hope had parked in front of the house, right behind the mailbox. She got out and walked over to the other girls who were standing in the driveway. She knew from both of their faces that they had been talking about her for the entire drive. 

 

“Okay, so, uh, let me give you fair warning about my parents,” Amy began. “They’re really intense.”

 

“Don’t worry, Hope. You’ll love Doug and Char-Char,” Molly said.

 

Hope raised her eyebrows as she followed the other two girls into the house through the front door, not knowing what to expect on the other side.

 

“Oh, honey, Amy and Molly are here, and they brought a tall friend!” Charmaine stood behind the kitchen counter, which was visible from the entrance, wearing an apron and slicing tomatoes.  

 

“A  _ threesome _ ?” Doug yelled from another room. “I have to see it to believe it!” He appeared in the kitchen in record time.

 

“Mom, Dad, this is Hope,” Amy said. Hope waved at them. “She’s a friend from school. We’re going to the protest together on Saturday.” 

 

“Well, it’s so nice to meet you, Hope,” Charmaine said. “You know, these two almost never hang out with other people, so you must be pretty special.”

 

“You’re welcome to stay for dinner,” Doug added.

 

Molly turned to Hope and grabbed her hand. “It’s taco night,” She said, with a look in her eyes that told Hope she had been looking forward to this for a month. Amy started to turn a deep shade of red. She looked down at the floor, rubbing her temples, just wanting to get upstairs as quickly as possible.

 

Hope just laughed. “It’s nice to meet both of you. You have a lovely home, and I’d be honored to stay for taco night.”

 

“Great, well, we have a lot of work to do, so call us down when dinner’s ready!” Amy said, grabbing both of the other girls by the arm and dragging them upstairs, just wanting to get away from any potential embarrassment her parents could stir up for her.

 

//

 

By the time dinner came around, the three girls had barely done any work at all. All three of them were happily surprised to be getting along so well. Amy and Molly learned that Hope wasn’t as shallow as everyone at school had made her out to be, and Hope learned that the two nerds were actually pretty fun to be around. They discussed books that they were reading, music they liked, and exchanged some gossip about the people in their class. Amy and Molly were floored by some of the things that went on at the parties that they heard about in passing but never went to, and Hope was genuinely shocked to hear about some of the drama and shenanigans that went on during extra curricular activities. Amy suffered through dinner with pink cheeks when Hope turned out to be Molly’s sidekick in playfully embarrassing her to her parents. After dinner was finished, they retreated to Amy’s room. 

 

Molly waited until Amy and Hope had actually started working on their poster before she collected her stuff and said, “Guys, this is so fun, but I’m gonna head out before I get distracted again.”

 

Hope and Amy were sitting on the floor together. Amy was outlining letters in pencil while Hope was painting them in. Hope looked up at Molly as she stood in the doorway and the other girl just winked at her. 

 

Amy looked up from her work and nodded at Molly. “Alright, well,” She said, beginning to stand up.

 

“I texted Jared to pick me up,” Molly explained, and Amy sat back down, using Hope’s shoulder to help her. It took all of Molly’s willpower not to wiggle her eyebrows at the physical contact. “Well, I better get going,” She said. “I’ll see you two tomorrow at school.” She then disappeared down the stairs. 

 

Amy suddenly became aware of how close the two girls were and a small blush began to creep down her cheeks. They continued working in silence for a few minutes, and Amy was surprised that it felt so comfortable. 

 

“So what’s the deal with Jared and Molly?” Hope asked. She stopped painting to look at Amy.

 

Amy glanced over at the girl as she continued tracing letters and shrugged. “He likes her. She hates him.”

 

“That’s harsh,” Hope said, smirking. “I don’t think I would let someone I hate know where I live.”

 

“And..where is it that you live again?” Amy asked, chuckling. She set her pencil down and turned to face Hope. 

 

“Are you testing me to see if I hate you?” 

 

“To be fair, you’ve sent some mixed signals over the years,” Amy replied.

 

Hope rolled her eyes. “My instinct is to be bitchy.”

 

“Interesting because you’ve been effortlessly nice tonight. I like nice Hope.”

 

Hope looked away from Amy, back down at their half-finished poster and smiled slightly. This was the first time Amy had seen Hope lost for words.

 

“But I also see you’re still withholding your address from me,” Amy teased. The other girl laughed.

 

“You know where Mike’s Diner is?” Hope asked. “It’s two blocks down. The house that usually has my car parked in the driveway.”

 

“Somehow I can’t picture it,” Amy said. 

 

“You’ll just have to come over after school tomorrow, I guess.” Hope sighed and shook her head. “Silly of me to assume I could get a moment away from the nerds…”

 

“Oh, shut up,” Amy said, bumping her shoulder against the other girl’s.

 

Hope raised an eyebrow. “Make me,” She said.

 

Normally, this would’ve sent Amy into gay panic mode, but she felt weirdly comfortable with the situation. Maybe it was the fact that her assumptions about Hope had been wrong. Amy smiled slightly and began to lean in, placing her hand on Hope’s arm. When Hope leaned in as well and closed her eyes, Amy grabbed the paintbrush out of her hand and swiped it across the girl’s cheek just as they were about to kiss. They both burst into a fit of laughter.

 

“Woooow,” Hope said, shaking her head. “That was a low blow.” 

 

Hope went to grab the paintbrush from Amy but the freckled girl held it in the air, away from her reach. “I thought your ego could use it.”

 

“Maybe,” Hope said. “But it was still low.” She went for the paintbrush again but grabbed Amy’s wrist instead. 

 

Amy dropped the brush on the carpeted floor. “Oh shit,” She said as she went to reach for the brush but ended up falling onto the carpet and pulling Hope with her. Hope had not-so-gracefully landed on top of Amy, and was hoping that this was not the ‘boob to boob’ time that Molly had told her about. She pushed herself up with her elbows, but she remained on top of the girl, looking down at her. Amy just turned her head to the side to look at the paintbrush. “You know my parents are gonna kill me for that, right?”

 

“They’re gonna think I’m a bad influence.”

 

“You’re not a bad influence,” Amy said, looking back up at Hope. “You’re just constructing intricate rituals.” 

 

Hope laughed and rolled her eyes. “Alright, nerd. I think that’s my cue to leave.” 

 

Hope pushed herself away from Amy and stood up. Amy bit her lip, not sure what to make of Hope’s abrupt shift in spirit. Hope motioned to the poster and said, “You wanna bring this to school and we can finish it at lunch?”

 

Amy nodded. “Sure,” She said as she propped herself up on her elbows. Hope grabbed her jacket and her backpack as Amy stood up. They walked down to the front door together in silence. 

 

“You might wanna wash your face when you get back,” Amy joked, shoving her hands into her pockets.

 

“Mhm,” Hope hummed as she looked down at the freckled girl. She could tell that Amy hated the mutual silence, but it didn’t bother her. “Thanks for inviting me over. Who knew you and your wife were cool underneath the surface?”

 

“Who knew you had a soft side?” Amy countered, smirking up at the taller girl. 

 

“If you ruin my rep around school, I will end you, nerd.”

 

“Oh yeah, sure,” Amy said as she reached for the handle of the front door. 

 

“Sorry about the paint on the carpet by the way,” Hope said as she stepped out onto the front porch.

 

Amy waved a hand in the air dismissively. “Don’t worry about it.” 

 

“Alright, later dork.” Hope began to back away from the front door with some sort of smirk on her face. 

 

“See ya,” Amy said. “Drive safe.”

 

Hope just laughed as she turned and walked through the front yard to her car. 


	3. Dominance by Robots

While Amy and Hope worked on their posters during lunch the next day, Molly had decided to let them have their space. It was a little bit depressing to be sitting at their regular secluded table alone, but Molly tried to shove down any negative feelings because she knew that it was a good thing for Amy to branch out. Maybe that’s why, when Jared came to sit next to her, she wasn’t totally repulsed by his presence. If Amy of all people could expand her horizons by hanging out with other people, so could Molly.

“So, where’s the partner in crime? Where’s my girl Amy?” Jared asked after he made his elaborate entrance in which he showed off his Gucci heelys by spinning in a circle around the table.

“She’s with Hope in the library,” Molly replied. She had explained the situation to Jared on the drive home the night before, so he just nodded.

“I would have never guessed someone like Hope would be Amy’s type,” He said as he took a seat across from Molly.

“Same,” Molly said. “I used to think the biggest factor for being the object of Amy’s affection was just to be non-threatening. I mean, the little white cat from the Aristocats, Ryan…” She trailed off. “Then again, yesterday she told me that she wasn’t interested in Hope but was still attracted to her.”

“That’s fair,” Jared said, nodding.

Molly had no idea why she was divulging this information to Jared, but she figured that he wouldn’t tell anyone, so it was safe. She dug a turkey and cheese sandwich out of her lunch bag, and unwrapped it, taking a bite.

“Is it weird having to share her with someone else?” Jared asked. “I mean, I know how close you guys are.”  
Molly shook her head and furrowed her eyebrows as she swallowed. “Absolutely not. Amy’s been talking about how much she wants a girlfriend since she came out, and she deserves this.”

“Well, if you ever need someone to hang with, you know this guy’s always here,” Jared said, pointing two thumbs at himself.

Molly rolled her eyes. “Thanks, Jared, but nobody can compare to Amy.”

“I agree completely!”

Molly jumped as she realized that Gigi was sitting right next to her. “Jesus fucking Christ, Gigi, where did you come from?”

“I floated down in a little basket when I was delivered to my parents just like the rest of us, duh,” Gigi replied.

“Not what I meant at all, but okay. That’s fine,” Molly said.

“Back to the topic at hand: Amy. What’s this I hear about her and Hope?” Gigi asked.

Jared sighed. “Geeg, you have to remember that you two agreed to just be friends in this lifetime.”

“It’s so difficult when she’s easily the hottest motherfucker around,” Gigi lamented. “But I have to respect her wishes. I know we’ll bang in the next lifetime anyway. She’s going to be a distinguished robot fighter in the resistance who looks strangely similar to Keanu Reeves and I’m going to be the twinky son of a wealthy robot executive. Oh, Molly, you’re going to be the fearless politician that leads our society to break the shackles of our oppression under the machinarchy – dominance by robots.”

Molly raised her eyebrows. “Okay, wow. Good to know that I’ll still be striving for success.”

“I’m supposed to be a pilot in the Air Force who commits treason by saving you and flying to Abu Dhabi,” Jared said.

“The city of Abu Dhabi still exists in the next lifetime?” Molly asked.

Gigi shook her head, sighing. “I don’t understand it either.”

Molly laughed. Gigi and Jared might have been a little overwhelming, but no one could argue that they weren’t entertaining.

//

It didn’t take long for Amy and Hope to finish painting their posters when they were under careful supervision of the school librarian as well as a few other students. Amy bit her bottom lip as she unlocked her phone to text Molly. She didn’t know how she was gonna justify ditching her twice in one day, but she told Hope that she would go over to the taller girl’s house to do homework that night.

“Agonizing over texting your wife?” Hope teased.

“Hey,” Amy said defensively. “We have spent every waking moment together for the past ten years. Separation anxiety is real.”

“You know you don’t have to come over today, right?” Hope said. “It would actually be preferable for you to come over when we don’t have homework to do.”

“Heh, nice try.” Amy said as she looked down at her phone again. “I don’t trust myself like that.”

Hope quirked an eyebrow. “Like what?”

“Shhh,” Amy said, waving a hand in Hope’s general direction as she began typing with the other.

Hope grabbed Amy’s free hand out of the air, intertwining their fingers. Even though she didn’t bother to look up from her phone, Amy’s face began to turn red. She continued typing.

A: Hey dude, Hope invited me over to do hw tonight….  
M: Omg what did u say???  
A: I said yea lol  
A: Sorry I know we had plans to go to ur place :(  
M: Nooo ur fine bby !  
M: I can’t find the scissor emoji rn but when I do it’s over for you hoes  
A: I love u Molls but scissoring isn’t real  
M: My favorite erotic documentary begs to differ…

“You guys are so strange,” Hope said as she read the texts over Amy’s shoulder.

Amy squeezed Hope’s hand as she turned in her seat to face the other girl again. “What did I say about being mean?”

Hope rolled her eyes and smirked. “It turns you off.”

The freckled girl scoffed. “That’s a complete misunderstanding of what I said.”

“So, it turns you on?”  
“I – you know wh– gah,” Amy stuttered, letting go of Hope’s hand to throw both of hers into the air in defeat. “Being mean...is mean.” She crossed her arms over her chest, flustered.

“You don’t say?” Hope chuckled.

Amy sighed and propped an elbow on the table, resting her cheek on her fist. She stared at Hope for a moment. “You’re never getting out of the homework zone,” She mumbled.

//

Molly found herself sitting in the passenger seat of Jared’s car for the second time in less than twenty-four hours. When she got the text from Amy about doing homework with Hope, Molly told Jared and Gigi that they should do something after school. Gigi suggested roller skating, and Molly figured that she could use some fun.

When they pulled into the practically empty parking lot, Gigi pulled out her tin of special things. Molly looked back at the other girl, a little concerned when she saw the white powder inside the tin. “Gigi, is that actually ground up vitamins or is it cocaine?” She asked.

Gigi scooped up some of the powder with the nail of her pinky finger and snorted it. “A mix of both, to be honest,” She replied.

Molly’s eyes widened in horror as she looked at Jared who just shook his head and whispered, “It’s all vitamins.”

After an incident in which Gigi forcefully claimed that she wore men’s size 11 skates and ended up throwing one of the skates at the employee when they didn’t fit, they decided to just get a couple of burgers and hang out by the little arcade in the back.

“You know, a couple days ago, I would have never thought that I’d be hanging out with you guys,” Molly said.

“This time yesterday, I wasn’t even allowed to talk at the Student Council meeting, so I feel ya there,” Jared said. Molly chuckled as she took a bite of her burger.

“Yeah, that rule still stands,” She said, placing her hand over her mouth as she mumbled with her mouth full.

“Sorry, I didn’t catch that,” Jared said, dipping a fry in his milkshake. “You need to stop mumbling so much, Molls.”

Molly rolled her eyes as she took another bite of her burger. She furrowed her eyebrows when she realized that the booth next to her was empty. “Where’d Gigi go?”  
Jared looked around and shrugged. “I have no –”

“Look,” Molly said, pointing behind him to the rink. Jared turned around in his seat to see Gigi skating around the middle of the rink. She had one arm extended while the other was holding onto her leg, which somehow was stretched behind her back and over her head. “I didn’t realize she was so flexible.”

“Oh yeah, she can twist her body into pretty much any formation. She’s practically a shapeshifter,” Jared replied, nodding.

“Does she do gymnastics?”

“I’ve never even seen her stretch, Molly.”

“Incredible,” Molly said, genuinely in awe of Gigi’s performance.

//

Nobody was home when Amy and Hope arrived at the taller girl’s house after school.

“My mom’s working until nine,” Hope explained as they passed through the living room and made their way down the hallway to her bedroom. Hope’s room was simple, and admittedly much smaller than Amy’s. A wooden framed bed was shoved into the corner next to the window. Sitting at the foot of the bed was a small trunk. On the walls were a few posters: Joni Mitchell, The Rolling Stones, Truman Capote, and more. Adjacent to the bed was a small wooden desk with a matching chair. Books were stacked on shelves above the desk. “It’s not much,” Hope said as she set her bag down and pulled her jacket off. “But it’s home.”

Amy laughed and shook her head. “Who’s the dork now?”

After a few hours of doing their homework and chatting sporadically, Hope tossed her math textbook to the side in frustration and reached under her bed. Amy glanced over at the girl and furrowed her eyebrows when she saw that Hope had a mason jar in her hand. “What’s that?” She asked.

Hope smirked and quirked an eyebrow at Amy as she unscrewed the cap of the jar. “You’ll see.” She reached into the jar and pulled out a sock, then grabbed her textbook, balancing it on her lap. She emptied the contents of the sock onto the book. Out fell rolling papers, a grinder, and a small bag of weed. Amy’s eyes widened as she realized what was happening. Hope chuckled at the freckled girl’s horrified expression. “Ever smoked a joint, Anstler?”

“I- uh,” Amy stuttered as she watched Hope place a bud in the grinder. “No. Never.”

“Do you want to?” Hope asked.

Amy raised her eyebrows, uncertain. “Should I?”

“Only you can answer that,” Hope said, dumping the contents of the grinder onto the textbook. She pulled a paper from the pack of rolling papers and began to pack it. “But, like, for the sake of my reputation in your eyes, it’s not like I’m smoking crack. It’s just weed.”

“Doesn’t it make you paranoid?” Amy asked.

“For some people, yeah,” Hope replied. “Honestly, it just depends on the person.”

Amy bit her bottom lip as she thought about what Molly would say. She honestly wasn’t sure whether her best friend would leave the room or light up if she was in the same situation. Neither of the two girls had experimented with anything more than a couple of wine coolers they stole from Molly’s refrigerator while her mom was out of town for work one weekend. Amy thought that it wouldn’t hurt, and she could just opt not to tell Molly if anything went wrong. Besides, how many times had she advocated for federal legalization of marijuana by listing out its health benefits?

Hope was almost finished rolling the joint by this point. She looked up at Amy as she licked the paper and folded it over. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t wanna do,” She said. “But it’d be my honor to smoke you out for the first time, nerd.”

Amy’s cheeks turned bright red and she laughed. “Okay, sure. Why not?”

They went out to the back porch to smoke. The weather was uncharacteristic for L.A.: muggy and overcast. Hope pulled a lighter out of her jacket pocket. She held the joint out and ignited the end carefully. She took two short hits and offered it to Amy. The freckled girl took the joint and brought it to her lips. She inhaled deeply and began to cough when the smoke hit the back of her throat. Hope chuckled. Amy looked over at the other girl, raising her eyebrows slightly as she took another drag, longer this time. She exhaled smoothly, without coughing, then handed the joint back to Hope.

“You’re not worried about the neighbors?” Amy asked. Even though the overcast weather helped, there was no denying that they were sitting on Hope’s patio furniture, smoking pot for everyone to see.

Hope shrugged. “Not really. I don’t think anybody really cares. It’s L.A.”

Amy nodded and they passed the joint back and forth a few more times in silence.

“I usually only smoke a little bit every now and then to relax,” Hope said as she let the half-smoked joint burn out. She set it on the table between them as she continued, “I only get high when I’m smoking with other people.”

Amy nodded. “You don’t need to explain yourself to me, you know. I’m not judging you for this.”

“I know,” Hope sighed. “There’s usually just this assumption that everyone who smokes is a stoner, and everyone already thinks I’m a stoner anyway.”

Amy thought for a second before replying. Hope took out her lighter again and reignited the end of the joint, taking another drag. “I think it’s unfair the way we just assume shit about people,” Amy said, taking the joint from Hope and bringing it to her lips once again. “It limits our connections.”

Hope nodded as she looked at Amy, who had one leg propped up on the chair and pulled up to her chest. The whites of the freckled girl’s eyes were a pinkish red. “How are you feeling?” Hope asked.

Amy giggled quietly and shrugged, squinting her eyes. “I feel alright,” She replied, sitting back in her seat.

“Yeah?” Hope asked, chuckling. She set the joint on the table to let it burn out again.

“Mhm, yeah...” Amy trailed off as she looked over the expanse of the backyard. The two girls burst into a fit of laughter when Amy’s gaze finally met Hope’s again.

Hope stood up and grabbed Amy’s hand. “Let’s go inside,” She said as she led the other girl off the porch and back into the house. “You hungry?”

Amy nodded as she followed Hope into the kitchen. “And thirsty.”

Hope opened the pantry door, and the two of them stood there, hand in hand, for an undetermined amount of time, staring at the food. Finally, Hope looked down at Amy and asked, “Do you want grilled cheese?”

“Do you have grilled cheese?” Amy asked, laughing as she held onto Hope’s forearm for support as she involuntarily felt her weight shift to one side of her body.

“I...don’t know,” Hope said. She wandered around the kitchen, gathering appliances and ingredients. When she opened the fridge, she grabbed two cans of Pepsi and handed them to the other girl. Amy set one down on the counter and cracked open the other, downing practically half the can in one gulp, making Hope double over in laughter.

Still laughing, she managed to say, “The sound that your throat just made…” before sliding down to sit on the linoleum floor, head down and arms wrapped around her abdomen.

“It’s the thirst,” Amy said, placing her hand over her face as she laughed so hard she snorted. When she noticed Hope was on the floor, she stuck her hand out to help the girl. “Oh no! Are you okay?”

Hope grabbed Amy’s hand, pulling her down. Amy clumsily fell onto her knees and then onto her butt, laughing all the way down. Hope looked over at the girl, tilting her head back slightly. Amy sat back against the cabinets behind them as she stared at Hope, quiet giggles escaping her lips every now and then. After a while, she reached over and placed her hand on the taller girl’s cheek. Hope placed her hand on the other girl’s arm as Amy moved closer to her until their faces were just inches away from each other.

“This is a bad idea isn’t it?” Amy asked.

Hope nodded and smiled as she removed the girl’s hand from her cheek, kissing her knuckles.

“But fuck it, right?”

Hope shrugged. “I don’t want to be the girl you kissed just because you were stoned.”

Amy nodded. “So...grilled cheese?”

As the two girls burst into yet another fit of laughter, they heard the front door open. “Shit,” Hope mumbled. “Shit, shit, shit,” She continued as they both stood up. Hope attempted to clean up the mess she had made without any luck. Amy leaned against the counter, one hand over her mouth, unsure of what to do.

“Hope?” They listened to the footsteps as they grew closer, and suddenly a woman who Amy assumed to be Hope’s mother stood in the entryway of the kitchen. “Oh, who’s this?”

Amy struggled to keep the giggles suppressed, but they kept coming up anyway, which apparently triggered the same in Hope.

“Mom,” Hope said between laughs. “Can we talk later?”

Hope’s mother just raised her eyebrows as she looked from one girl to the other. Hope grabbed the shorter girl’s hand and avoided eye contact with her mother as she headed back to her room.

“I-I’m Amy, by the way.” The girl waved awkwardly as they passed the older woman on their way out of the kitchen.

Hope’s mom just chuckled, and called down the hallway, “Nice meeting you, Amy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all I rly cannot stop writing this lol so thank you so much to everyone who has been reading/commenting! Y'all are amazing! Lmk what u think of this chapter :)


	4. A Lesbian Feminist’s Wet Dream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y’all! Thank u so much for reading and commenting and everything :) I just wanted to let y’all know that I won’t be updating for like a week cause I’ll be out of town but I’m hoping to have two more chapters after I get back!

“So you’re telling me that you hung out with Jared and Gigi...and you had  _ fun _ ?” Amy asked, eyebrows raised as she looked down at Molly over the side of the top bunk in her bedroom.

 

Molly was lying on her back on the lower bunk, arms above her head. She just nodded. “I was surprised too. Gigi even made us hold a friendship seance in the parking lot before we left.” 

 

“Who are we?” 

 

Molly chuckled. “I was thinking about that when I got home last night. What a weird fucking week.”

 

“Very weird,” Amy agreed. 

 

“I mean, you got high with Hope,” Molly said. “And met her mom just moments after almost kissing her.”

 

“And after that, we watched Venom on her laptop in her room. So it just got progressively weirder.”

 

“Jesus Christ,” Molly murmured. “How was it?”

 

“Venom? So awful, but so funny.”

 

“I can imagine,” Molly said, nodding. “So it seems like Hope is our little expectations subverter, huh?” She asked, smirking up at Amy.

 

The freckled girl just laughed and shrugged. “I think she’s just indecisive about me.”

 

“Ugh, Amy!” Molly said as she grabbed a pillow and threw it up at the other girl. “What about the statement ‘I don’t want to be the girl you kissed just because you were stoned’ says indecisive?”

 

The pillow very narrowly missed hitting Amy in the face. She grabbed it, throwing it back down to Molly. “Hey! I will not hesitate to throw Ling Ling.”

 

Molly put her hands up in defeat. “Okay, all I’m saying is that she likes you.”

 

“I mean - that’s, you know, it’s up for interpretation,” Amy rambled.

 

“Amy, this is not the time to hashtag resist, okay? You’ve gotta step it up and get the girl,” Molly said, sitting up.

 

Amy bit down on her bottom lip, furrowing her eyebrows. “I mean, I  _ tried _ last night, but she didn’t want me to.”

 

“Think about it, Ames. It wouldn’t be right for your first kiss to happen while both of you were high.”

 

“It doesn’t matter that much, though, does it?”

 

“It might to her.”

 

“I guess I just don’t like the mixed signals. Like, that was the first time I ever made a move on anybody. I just keep getting the feeling that she doesn’t actually like me and this is all some elaborate prank, you know?”

 

“Ames,” Molly said, her voice softer than before. 

 

“It’s all in my head, I know. Don’t lecture me, Molls.”

 

Molly shook her head. “You are a fucking catch, and it’s pretty damn obvious that Hope is head over heels because have you  _ ever  _ seen her enjoy interacting with anyone? This girl straight up hates people but has wanted to spend the past two days with  _ you _ . She shared her weed with you.”

 

“I mean...that’s fair. I kinda can’t argue with that one,” Amy trailed off.

 

“Exactly,” Molly said. “Do I need to pull up my powerpoint presentation on why you are literally the most perfect specimen on this planet or are we okay now?”

 

Amy chuckled. “I think we’re okay,” She replied. They sat in a comfortable silence for a moment before Amy asked, “So what’s up with you and Jared?”

 

“What do you mean?” Molly’s eyes narrowed as she spoke.

 

“I mean he’s only got a massive crush on you.”

 

Molly rolled her eyes. “I can’t enjoy his company?”

 

Amy shook her head. “No, I just wanna know if you enjoy his company or if you  _ enjoy  _ his  _ company _ .”

 

“I enjoy his company. That’s it,” Molly replied, remaining uncharacteristically reserved about the topic.

 

“Well, let me know if that changes,” Amy said as she smirked down at her friend, quirking an eyebrow. “It’d be pretty amazing if we both got deflowered senior year.” 

 

Molly scoffed. “Too bad you’ve already been deflowered by Ling Ling,” She said, staring up at the deformed panda bear sitting on the shelf, conveniently situated right next to the top bunk Amy slept in every night.

 

Amy ignored the comment. “If we get deflowered together, would it be weird to plan it to happen at the same time?”

 

“From a completely objective perspective? Yes. But from my perspective, that’s so beautiful for our friendship, and I’m genuinely touched that you would do that for me.” 

 

“So theoretically, if we were gonna make that happen, who would be an eligible sexual partner for Miss Molly Davidson?” Amy asked. “And I swear there will be no judgement on my part.”

 

Molly exhaled deeply as she thought for a moment, her eyes glued to the ceiling. “Honestly, I can’t count Jared out,” She said.

 

Amy nodded. “If that’s what you want, Molls. In the words of a wise woman, this is not the time to hashtag resist.” 

 

Molly bit her bottom lip. “I mean, his face is nice to look at, and he makes me laugh. But god, he’s so annoying sometimes.”

 

“I thought that was just how straight women felt about men in general,” Amy said.

 

Molly chuckled. “You’re not wrong.” 

 

“I think you should go for it, Molls. We deserve to let loose and have some fun.”

 

“You’re right, but I’m not letting myself do that until I get the rest of my college applications sent in.”

 

“That’s fair,” Amy said. “I just sent in my application to Columbia, but I’m still working on Cornell and Smith.”

 

“Only you would use Smith as your safety school,” Molly said, laughing. “It’s a lesbian feminist’s wet dream.” 

 

“Hey, it might not be Ivy League, but if I can’t get into my top two, then I might as well spend four years around intelligent women,” Amy replied. 

 

“You’re so right,” Molly said. “Maybe I should apply to Smith too.”

 

“I have a feeling Yale’s gonna go crazy for you, and if not, then it’ll be Brown or Harvard or Princeton, or –“

 

“Okay, you don’t need to expose me for applying to every Ivy League school.”

 

Amy laughed. “You’re gonna get into at least one of them. So we might as well enjoy our last year of high school.” 

 

Molly modded. “If Gigi, Jared, and Hope turned out to be cool and worth getting to know, maybe the rest of our classmates aren’t so bad either.” 

 

//

 

In the days between Amy’s after school visit to Hope’s house and the protest, the two girls had been texting non-stop. It seemed like both of them were uneasy about actually interacting in real life after the event that Molly cleverly dubbed ‘Grilled Cheese-gate.’ The two girls made some small talk in class, but when Hope had attempted to approach Amy in the hallway, it ended in Amy accidentally dropping her massive AP Chemistry textbook on the girl’s foot. Needless to say, Amy was nervous when she showed up to Hope’s house Saturday morning before the protest. Amy parked behind Hope’s car in the driveway. Hope was already waiting outside on the front porch. 

 

The two girls greeted each other and walked to the bus stop together in silence. They had decided to take the bus downtown because they would never be able to find parking. Amy was carrying the two posters they had made, and Hope had her camera slung around her neck. They sat down on the bench when they got to the stop.

 

“So, what should I expect?” Hope asked, turning to look at the other girl.

 

“Oh um.” Amy had forgotten that this was Hope’s first protest and thought for a moment about all of the things she had to learn on her own. “Well, first it’s best not to bring anything that could be considered a weapon, or, uh – illegal substances.” 

 

Hope chuckled. “Yeah, I’m not dumb enough to risk bringing weed to a place where there’s gonna be a ton of cops, Amy.”

 

“I know that – just checking,” Amy defended, raising her eyebrows as she looked down at the sidewalk. “You’re a little bit of a wildcard sometimes.”

 

“Fair enough. What else?”

 

“Well, uh, you probably already know this, but if people start trashing shit or fighting, stay as far away as possible. You don’t need to really worry about it that much, cause I’m really good at peacing out of dangerous situations,” Amy said, looking up at Hope and smiling slightly. “And, you know, the media portrays protests as people coming together over one specific issue, which is generally true, but people have different agendas. There’ll be people looking to start something with the cops and then there are groups that actually are there specifically to protect protesters if it turns into a riot. You’ll have your anarchists and communists and social democrat circles among others. I usually get in with the social democrats because they scare me the least, and we agree on a lot of the same issues.”

 

Hope laughed. “They scare you the least?”

 

“Most of them are women,” Amy explained. “The communists and anarchists tend to be men. Some are nice, but a lot of times they try to incite something with us because they don’t think we’re radical enough or whatever. It’s actually really stupid that this kind of stuff happens at protests…” Amy rambled.

 

“Who knew inter-protest politics were so complicated,” Hope said, giving Amy a faux thoughtful look before smirking at the girl.

 

Amy laughed. “Hey, I’m just trying to prepare you for whatever might happen.”

 

“Don’t worry. I’m actually kinda interested,” Hope said. “So, do you consider yourself a social democrat?”

 

Amy shrugged as the bus pulled up. The two girls stood up from the bench and boarded the bus, sitting in the back. “Well,” Amy started, “I kind of just consider myself a liberal or just a progressive. I mean, I’m registered as a Democrat, obviously, but I don’t have all of my political opinions sorted out, especially as I learn more about our political system and its nuances.” 

 

“That’s fair,” Hope said, nodding. “I’m not really a political person, to be honest. Like, I plan on voting in the midterms in November, but that’s about it.”

 

“Well you’re going to this protest,” Amy said, nudging the girl in the ribs. “So that’s something.”

 

“All I’m gonna do is hang out with you and take pictures,” Hope said, rolling her eyes. “That’s not gonna throw Trump out of office.”

 

“You wanna know a secret?” Amy asked. Hope raised her eyebrows. “Protests kind of  _ are  _ just people hanging around with each other. I mean, yeah, there’s chanting and yelling, but it really is just people hanging around. It may not affect direct change, but we’re letting people know that we’re pissed off. It’s powerful, and in some ways, therapeutic.” 

 

Hope nodded. “I never thought about it like that.”

 

Amy smiled and shrugged. “Oh yeah,” She said. “I forgot to tell you that when taking pictures, make sure you don’t get too into people’s personal space unless you’re explicitly invited to. A lot of people don’t want their picture taken and could try to start something with you. If that happens, just let them know that you’re not a journalist and won’t get it developed since you can’t really, you know, delete film.” Amy motioned to Hope’s camera. 

 

“That’s good to know,” Hope replied. “And, no, there’s no deleting film. I’ll probably get it developed anyway.” 

 

Amy smiled and rolled her eyes at the girl, leaning closer to her. “I know you’re probably gonna want to wander off from the crowd to get pictures, so I’m gonna just follow you around today because the golden rule of protesting is to have a buddy at all times.”

 

“So you won’t actually be part of the protest?” Hope asked, raising her eyebrows. 

 

“Hey, I still have these signs,” She said. “I can multitask.”

 

“Babysitting me and protesting all at once,” Hope murmured as she gently placed her hand on Amy’s shoulder, pushing her away as she held her camera up to one eye, snapping a quick portrait of the freckled girl. 

 

“Oh, jeez...that’s gonna be flattering,” Amy joked.

 

“I think it will be,” Hope said, letting her camera fall back against her stomach. 

 

The bus pulled up to their stop, and the girls got off. They only had to walk a few blocks before they ran into the crowd they were looking for.

 

“Wow,” Hope said. “Lots of energy.”

 

Amy tugged on the arm of the taller girl’s jacket as she spotted some people she knew. She took Hope’s hand as she dragged the girl over to a small group within the crowd. “Amy!” The three girls shouted in unison.

 

“Hey guys,” Amy said, waving. She looked up at Hope and back at her protest friends. “This is my, uh...protest buddy for the day, Hope. We go to school together. Um, Hope, this is Joanna, Maya, and Naomi. Naomi is my usual protest buddy,” She said as the other girls greeted Hope. 

 

Hope furrowed her eyebrows. “Do you not have a protest buddy for today now?” She asked Naomi, who stood closest to her. “Cause you can–“

 

“Don’t worry. I’ve got her.” A figure wedged her way between Hope and Naomi

 

“Oh, for fucks sake, Gigi,” Hope said, eyes wide at the sudden arrival of the last person she thought would be here. 

 

Amy looked just as surprised as Hope, with her mouth hanging slightly agape. “Gigi, what are you doing here?”

 

Gigi put her arm around Naomi’s shoulders and winked at the two of them. “You needed me.” 

 

“Did we?” Amy asked.

 

“Yeah you did,” Gigi said. “I’ve got this shit under control. Love you, Queen.”

 

“Okay, Gigi, you know what we talked about…” Amy trailed off as Hope turned to the girl, one eyebrow quirked up in confusion.

 

“I know, platonic soulmates,” Gigi sighed. “Just know you could hit it if you change your mind. Whenever. Wherever.” 

 

“Okay, well, we better go,” Amy said, grabbing Hope’s hand again and dragging her away as quickly as they came. Hope snapped a picture of Gigi before the two girls passed out of her line of sight. 

 

“She is the last person I would expect to be here,” Hope said as they made their way out of the crowd. 

 

“Molly told me that she was going to the movies with Jared and Gigi today, so same here,” Amy said, chuckling as she looked up at the other girl. 

 

“Oh, of course,” Hope said. “She probably got tired of third wheeling your wife and Justin Bieber incarnate.”

 

The two girls found themselves standing on the sidewalk, away from the commotion in the street. Amy followed Hope around as the taller girl took pictures, holding both signs in the air and following the crowd’s chants. As the march went on, the energy of the crowd kept growing. At some point, Amy had stopped participating and resigned to pointing out subjects for Hope’s photos. After a while, Hope stepped into the street to get closer to the action, and the shorter girl grabbed the back of her shirt, stopping her.

 

Hope furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. “Sorry,” Amy said, letting her hand fall back to her side. “I just have a feeling that things could go south soon.”

 

“What do you mean by south?”

 

Amy jerked her head slightly in the direction of the cops. They were leading the protesters in the march, but it was very obvious that the police had not sent enough officers to match the energy of the crowd. “It could turn bad pretty quick.”

 

“Oh come on,” Hope said, grabbing Amy’s hand and stepping into the street again. “It won’t hurt us to get a little closer.” The girl dragged Amy through the crowd until they were in the middle of it. Hope intermittently snapped photos as they walked with the congregation of people.

 

Amy squeezed Hope’s hand. “Okay, I know you wanna get pictures, but I’m seriously nervous that the cops are gonna do something,” She said.

 

Hope squeezed the shorter girl’s hand back as she took one last picture. She nodded. “Alright, let’s –“

 

They heard the sound of glass shattering close by before Hope could finish her sentence. Someone wearing a black mask over his face had thrown a rock at a storefront.

 

“Shit,” Amy mumbled. “Yeah, we have to go now.” 

 

The rest of the crowd had also decided that it was time to scatter because the two girls felt themselves being pushed toward the side of the street that the noise had come from. They were pushed around sweaty bodies to the sidewalk where they saw shattered glass and a group of cops running straight at them, batons out. Hope dragged Amy around the corner and they let go of each other to break out into a sprint. 

 

“Holy shit,” Amy muttered as they ran, glancing behind her shoulder. One of the cops had turned the corner along with them and was only about a block behind them. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

 

“You think you can jump one of these fences?” Hope asked, gesturing to the concrete walls they were running next to. 

 

Amy nodded. “Do you think he’d follow us over it?”

 

“Only one way to see,” Hope said, looking back at the man chasing them. “The one up there,” She said. “Now!”

 

Hope jumped first, grabbing the edge of the concrete and pushing her body over in two swift movements. Amy jumped up just a second after the taller girl and surprised herself with her ability to swing her body over the wall without injuring herself. They braced themselves for the fall, but the water came as a shock. Hope felt her feet hit the bottom of the pool first and her knees buckled, making her slip under the surface. Amy was submerged before she could understand what was happening. Hope emerged from the water, gasping and cursing. She swam to the edge as quick as she had fallen and pulled herself out. She held her hand to pull Amy out when the freckled girl surfaced, choking water out of her lungs. 

 

“Who the  _ fuck _ builds a wall right next to their fucking pool?” Amy said as they ran through the yard to the next street over. 

 

“Good question,” Hope said, looking up and down the street. “Morons,” She mumbled, exhaling in exhaustion as she determined that they were safe and collapsed into the grass on the median. 

 

Amy fell down next to her, still coughing. “Oh shit, your camera,” She said, looking over at the other girl. 

 

Hope closed her eyes and laughed. “I can explain this to my mom.” She pulled the camera strap over her neck and set the camera upright on her stomach. “At least we didn’t get arrested.”

 

Amy nodded. “At least we didn’t get arrested,” She repeated. “I -I’m really sorry I brought you to this. I’ll buy you a new camera.”

 

Hope shook her head. “That’s okay,” She said, placing her hand on Amy’s arm. “It was my idea to jump the wall.”

 

“Yeah, and you saved our asses from getting fucked over by that cop.”

 

“Just – don’t worry about it, nerd,” Hope said, a smile slowly spreading across her face. 

 

Amy smiled back at the girl and sat up, placing her hands in her lap. “Well, I didn’t really think that this would end with both of us being soaked – or at least not literally.”

 

Hope nodded and chuckled as she sat up as well. She reached over, brushing blades of grass from Amy’s hair. “You expected us to be metaphorically soaked?” She asked, eyebrows raised.

 

Amy shrugged, laughing. “Intellectually soaked,” She replied. “It’s when your brain is turned on.”

 

“Oh, I didn’t realize that in addition to being a lesbian, you’re also sapiosexual,” Hope joked, leaning closer as she tucked a damp strand of hair behind Amy’s ear.

 

“Mhm,” Amy hummed, leaning closer to the taller girl. She exhaled slowly, her eyes jumping from Hope’s eyes to her lips. A trace of the classic Hope smirk crossed the girl’s face for a moment, only to be replaced with a look of genuine fondness. Amy leaned in and closed her eyes, holding her breath as her lips met Hope’s for the first time. The kiss lasted a little longer than a peck before Amy pulled away to survey the other girl’s reaction. Hope just stared at her for a moment before leaning in and kissing her again, this time with more intensity. Amy gripped the front of Hope’s jacket as the other girl began to pull away again, pulling her back into it. Hope raised her eyebrows slightly at Amy’s fervor and missed placing her hand on the girl’s hip, accidentally pushing her back into the grass again. Amy laughed as she pulled the girl down with her, pecking her lips one last time before parting. 

 

“So, uh,” Amy stuttered. “Do you wanna go get pancakes?”

 

Hope chuckled and nodded. “Of course, nerd.”


	5. Later, Comrades!

Since Amy was spending her Saturday with Hope, Molly had decided to go see A Star is Born with Jared and Gigi. As per usual, Jared pulled up to Molly’s place in his car with Gigi in the back seat. 

 

When Molly got into the passenger seat, Gigi shot forward, inhaling the scent of the other girl’s hair. “God, I missed you,” She whispered throwing her arms around the seat and caressing Molly’s face.

 

“Alright, Geeg,” Jared said, waving the girl back. “Be cool,” He said as he continued down the road.

 

“Jared, I know you’re jealous that I’ve made a stronger bond with Molly than you but –“

 

Jared jerked forward in his seat, staring out of the windshield intently. “Is that Justin Timberlake?” He pointed to a jogger with a slim build and a buzz cut. 

 

“Oh my god. JT? I haven’t seen him since Coachella 2013,” Gigi murmured as she opened the car door.

 

Jared slammed on the brakes as Molly turned in her seat. Before either of them could say anything, Gigi was saluting them and jumping out of the car to chase after the jogger. “Later, comrades!”

 

“She never stops,” Molly said, chuckling as she shook her head.

 

“Well, that’s classic Gigi,” Jared replied, looking over at Molly. “You’d be surprised to know that it gets stressful at times.” 

 

“Oh, I can imagine. I mean, sometimes I think that dealing with Amy is a handful.”

 

Jared raised his eyebrows. “Wow...really?” He asked.

 

“Well, as her friend, I feel like I’m always having to push her to do things” Molly explained. “Sometimes I just wish she’d grow up a little.”

 

“You know, out of all of the people we go to school with, I would have never picked you and Amy out as having friendship issues,” Jared said.

 

Molly shrugged, and said, “When you spend all of your time with someone you love a lot, there’s bound to be a few issues.”

 

“I guess that’s true.”

 

“You know, I used to think that your friendship with Gigi was superficial rich kid bullshit,” Molly said. 

 

Jared shook his head as he pulled into the parking lot of the movie theater. “No way. She’s my best friend. I mean, even though she knows pretty much everything about everybody, she’s still the only person who gets me. I don’t have to pretend around her.”

 

“You do a lot of pretending at school don’t you?” Molly asked, not to be mean, but because she felt like Jared wouldn’t be offended by the question.

 

Jared shrugged as he pulled into a spot and parked. “Maybe I do more than others, but I think everyone does to a certain extent. People put on all kinds of masks to keep themselves from getting hurt.”

 

Once inside, the two bought their tickets as well as popcorn and soda. In the theater, they made sure to leave a seat next to them open in case Gigi decided to pop in.

 

//

 

Gigi had just finished chasing down someone who she initially  _ thought _ was Justin Timberlake but was actually just a middle-aged jogger with a practical haircut. After a short interaction where she tackled him onto someone’s front lawn in a hug, she found out that he had been listening to JT as he was running, so she blamed her lack of intuition on that. Honestly, Gigi was having a rough day already. Between the jogger incident and the fact that Jared woke up on the left side of his bed instead of the right, the latter of which she had predicted with confidence the night before, her senses felt duller than usual. 

 

She decided to hitchhike downtown because she had a small feeling in a little corner of her heart that Amy would need her at the protest. When she showed up and found out that Naomi, Amy’s protest friend needed a new protest buddy for the day, the spring in her step returned. Though she was disappointed that she didn’t get to spend much time with Amy, she knew that she had to share her “platonic” soulmate with Hope for now. Gigi and Amy would get to be lovers in the next lifetime anyway. She couldn’t see Hope very clearly in the next lifetime, but she figured she’d be her close friend or maybe a servant. 

 

“How do you know Amy?” Naomi asked Gigi as Amy pulled Hope away from the group.

 

“Well, it’s actually kind of a long story,” Gigi said, smirking. “Normally, I just say ‘school’ but it’s far more nuanced than that.”

 

Naomi furrowed her eyebrows. “How so?” The two other girls, Joanna and Maya had stopped talking to listen in.

 

“Well, if you wanna start at the beginning, she was a soldier and I was an artisan in Ancient Egypt. I tried a hard sell on a vase, but she wasn’t having it. She bought the vase anyway and we banged immediately after,” Gigi began. “And of course, later in China’s Golden Age, we were students studying for our civil examinations. She helped me understand fractions. And I will  _ never  _ forget how sexy she looked burning me at the stake during the Spanish Inquisition.” 

 

The three girls just stared at her with their heads cocked to the side and incredulous expressions on their faces. “You know what?” Naomi said. “I’m just gonna third-wheel these two today. But thanks for offering though.”

 

Gigi shrugged as she walked away. “Then I guess it won’t be my fault if you get mildly injured today.”

 

She wandered off into the crowd as she looked for Amy and Hope, just to keep an eye on them if anything went wrong. She found them quickly and kept close distance, feeling a small twinge of jealousy as she watched them interact throughout the march. 

 

At one point, when it seemed like the protest wasn’t going to turn sinister, she stopped to talk to a group wearing masks who seemed like they would be kind enough to give her the dramatic exit she needed. She tapped the arm of the guy closest to her and tried to yell above the noise, “Can you help me leave?” She asked.

 

The guy looked down at her, and she could see confusion in his eyes though she couldn’t see the rest of his face. “You got punched by the police?” He yelled, anger in his voice.

 

“Only once in the 70s,” Gigi said, but the guy wasn’t listening to her anymore. 

 

The man had bent down to pick a slab of broken concrete off the ground and threw it at a storefront. “Fucking pigs!” He yelled. It wasn’t long before people were running in all directions. Gigi spotted Amy and Hope as they passed her in the crowd and noticed an officer following them. She sprinted to catch up with the cop. After a block or two, Gigi had managed to tackle the guy as the other two girls jumped over a wall into someone’s backyard. 

 

//

 

There were various moments during A Star is Born where Molly shed more than a few tears, but Jared didn’t gain the courage to place his hand on hers until the ending scene. Molly, comforted by the gesture, intertwined their fingers, and wiped away the tears from her cheeks. “I hate to admit it, but this type of shit gets me every time,” She said as the credits started to roll. Jared shrugged, and as he was opening his mouth to reply, Gigi popped into view from the seat next to him.

 

“Guys, that movie was an emotional rollercoaster,” She said, reaching into her bag of popcorn and throwing a piece into her mouth.

 

Jared and Molly both jumped, letting go of each other. Gigi looked down at their hands. “Did I interrupt something?” She asked. “Because I can disappear if you guys need me to.” 

 

Jared’s cheeks had turned to a light shade of pink. “Pfft,  _ what _ ? There was nothing to interrupt.”

 

“Nope. Just friends being friendly and doing things that friends platonically do together,” Molly said, nodding. 

 

“Okay, well I’ll have you know that Amy is completely safe now,” Gigi said as they all got up and made their way out of the theater.

 

Molly furrowed her eyebrows at Gigi’s comment. “I mean, I would hope she is…”

 

“Well, I’m telling you that she is, so there’s no need to worry.”

 

“Now I’m kind of worried about it.”

 

“Don’t be.”

 

“Okay…” Molly trailed off, exchanging an amused look with Jared as they walked outside. 

 

“So how was Amy and Hope’s date?” Jared asked.

 

“Well, first of all, it wasn’t a date. Their words, not mine,” Gigi said. 

 

“It definitely is a date,” Molly said. “Going to a protest together is like lesbian third base.” 

 

“Yeah, I feel like they’ve had what some would consider three or four dates just this week,” Jared said.

 

“Not the point,” Gigi said as they all climbed into Jared’s car. “And I think they had a good time. I tackled a cop for them. Little things one does for one’s platonic soulmate, you know.”

 

“Good to know that your intensity toward Amy rivals my own platonic feelings for her,” Molly said as Jared pulled out of the parking lot. 

 

“Well, I was actually supposed to be her best friend in this life, but remember in 2nd grade when you got sick on the field trip to the planetarium? That fucked it all up because you threw up on Amy when you were supposed to throw up on Theo.”

 

“I was supposed to be best friends with Theo?” Molly asked, scrunching her nose up as she turned in her seat to look back at Gigi.

 

Gigi nodded. “Weird, right? You would be stoned out of your mind all the time and then you would end up working at Buzzfeed after high school.”

 

Molly gasped. “That’s about as bleak as you can get.”

 

“Geeg, do you want me to drop you off at your place?” Jared asked. 

 

“Actually, just drop me off at this corner up here,” Gigi said. “I have some business to do with a girl named Hannah who may or may not be selling me a pair of clown shoes.” 

 

“Okay, text me when you get home, though, alright?” Jared said as he pulled up to the corner and stopped. 

 

“Always,” Gigi said as she got out of the car, throwing them a peace sign.

 

Molly glanced over at Jared as he pulled away from the corner and looked down at her hands. 

 

“So, are Amy and Hope are a thing now?” Jared asked.

 

“I think they want to be,” Molly replied, smiling over at the boy. “But they’re both so weird about expressing it that I don’t even know at this point.”

 

Jared nodded as he stared at the road. “Yeah, that’ll do it.”

 

Molly looked over at him again. “Yeah, I think that when you like someone, you should just tell them, you know?” 

 

Jared glanced over at her, making brief eye contact. He raised his hand to turn the volume of the radio up slightly. “I, uh,” He started, nodding along to the song. “I get that, yeah.”

 

Jared pulled up to Molly’s apartment complex and parked the car. When Molly made no move to get out of the car, they sat in silence for a moment before Jared said, “You know, Molls, I’ve liked you since freshman year.” 

 

“I know,” Molly said, nodding and turning her body as she reached across the center console. She placed her hands on Jared’s face as she leaned in to kiss him. He inhaled sharply as the girl’s lips met his, but immediately relaxed into the kiss. Molly pulled away after a few seconds and raised her eyebrows. “You know, I think we should be a thing,” She said. 

 

Jared nodded. “Yup, me too,” He said before leaning in and kissing her again.

 

//

 

“You’re so bold,” Amy whispered as she sat with Molly in the library at lunch. “You’re like a straight white man, the way you just fuckin’ take charge, dude.” 

 

“You really should take notes,” Molly said, smirking at the other girl.

 

“Okay, that’s fair, but let’s not forget that I also initiated a kiss this weekend,” Amy replied defensively. “Actually, multiple kisses. Like, I made out with someone, so. There’s that.”

 

“And I love that for you,” Molly said. “Has she asked you to Homecoming yet?”

 

“Uh, no,” Amy laughed, shaking her head. 

 

Molly quirked an eyebrow. “She should get on that soon.”

 

“Molls, we’re literally supposed to be planning Homecoming right now. I doubt she’s even thought about it. Besides, who said it’s her responsibility to ask me?” 

 

Molly rolled her eyes. “Well, one of you has to do it.”

 

“Yeah, but the logistics of a relationship with two girls is more complicated than–“

 

“No it’s not.” 

 

Molly and Amy looked behind them to see Annabelle standing in the stacks behind them, textbooks in hand. 

 

“Um, what?” Amy asked, her confusion as to why Annabelle was even talking to them at all showing on her face.

 

“Having a relationship with a girl is no different than having a relationship with a guy. You’re just a pussy,” Annabelle explained.

 

Molly narrowed her eyes as she listened to the girl speak. “I’m sorry, Triple A, but I don’t see anyone here who asked for your opinion on the matter, so why don’t you just pipe the fuck down?”

 

Annabelle raised her eyebrows. “If you’re gonna talk loud enough about your dating problems in the middle of the library, the least you could do is accept some criticism from someone with actual experience.”

 

“Giving guys blowjobs on the side of the road doesn’t count as relationship experience,” Molly spat back. A look of genuine hurt flashed across Annabelle’s eyes for a moment, evident to Amy, but it quickly slipped away, completely unnoticed by Molly.

 

“Okay,” Amy said, placing her hand on Molly’s arm. “I think we should step back and try to de-escalate this conversation.” 

 

“Amy, she just called you a pussy, and you’re gonna sit there and take it? That’s bullshit,” Molly lowered her voice as she said this, placing her hand on top of the other girl’s. Amy gave her a look that said ‘just drop it’ and Annabelle rolled her eyes at the entire exchange.

 

“You’re planning Homecoming?” Annabelle asked as she tossed her books onto the table and circled around to sit across from them. 

 

Amy nodded. “The theme is Disco Fever this year.”

 

Annabelle snorted. “Predictable.” 

 

“Why sit down if you’re just gonna mock us?” Molly asked.

 

Annabelle shrugged. “Because it’s fun?”

 

“You’re a seriously infuriating person, you know that right?” Molly said. 

 

“I know how you can make Homecoming good this year,” Annabelle said.

 

“How?” Amy asked.

 

“Spike the punch.”

 

“Jesus Christ,” Molly muttered. “It’s like talking to the human embodiment of chlamydia.” 

 

“At least my personality isn’t just a badly disguised superiority complex.”

 

“Okay, we’re not gonna spike the punch, Annabelle,” Amy said before Molly could shoot a response back at the other girl.

 

“Then it’s gonna be really hard for you to make your dance any fun,” Annabelle replied.

 

“Well, what else – other than illegal stuff – can we do?” Amy asked.

 

“Well, let’s start with the music,” Annabelle replied. “Who do you have lined up?”

 

“Jared’s DJing,” Molly said.

 

Annabelle started to laugh, but she realized the statement wasn’t a joke when the other two girls remained unphased. “You’re serious? Absolutely not. First of all, he’s a terrible DJ. You guys wouldn’t know because you don’t go to parties, but he only plays random EDM songs and Daft Punk’s ‘Get Lucky’ on repeat.” 

 

Amy tried to hide her distaste at the thought of having to even listen to EDM at all, but Molly kicked her under the table anyway. “I mean…” She began. “That’s a valid reason not to hire him as the DJ.” 

 

“I bet Tanner’s cousin could hook you up,” Annabelle said. “He DJs on the side and buys us booze, so he’s cool.” Annabelle reached across the table and pulled Molly’s notebook out from under the other girl’s hands, turning it to face herself. She picked up her pen and wrote down a phone number underneath Molly’s previous notes. “His name is Cheese.”

 

“Cheese?” Amy asked, raising her eyebrows.

 

“I think his real name might be Chase, but the nickname predates even Tanner’s memory, so.” Annabelle shrugged. 

 

Molly snatched her notebook back and smoothed the pages down as if she was attempting to clean the page of Annabelle’s touch. “Does he do well with themes?”

 

“He’ll do whatever you tell him to.”

 

“Fine. I guess we’ll look into it.”

 

Amy looked from Annabelle to Molly, back to Annabelle again, attempting to decipher what had just occurred between the two that she couldn’t seem to interpret, but ultimately dropped it. “So, what else?” She asked.

 

“Do a photo booth instead of a photographer,” Annabelle said. “Oh, and as few faculty chaperones as you can get away with. Only get the cool and or hot teachers to chaperone. Don’t go heavy on the decorations. Make the gym smell better than a sweaty jockstrap.” 

 

“Most of those are fair requests, but I’m standing my ground on decorations,” Molly said as she took notes. 

 

“Listen, minimalism will save this dance,” Annabelle said, leaning over the table slightly.

 

“Decorations clearly define the theme, and disguise the grotesque appearance of the gym. They’re absolutely necessary, and I will not elaborate further.”

 

“She’s got a point,” Amy said. “Decorations are fun.”

 

Annabelle threw up her hands in defeat. “Don’t blame me when people say it’s cheesy.”

 

“School dances are supposed to be cheesy. That’s what makes them fun,” Molly replied.

 

“I think we have deeply different interpretations of the word fun,” Annabelle said.

 

For the next hour, the three girls argued and came to multiple compromises over the details of the dance. Molly and Amy were surprised by Annabelle’s willingness to help them and her rational suggestions while Annabelle found out that the other two girls were shockingly flexible enough to actually listen to her advice. Despite Molly and Annabelle’s constant banter, they actually managed to plan almost the entire dance. 

 

When the three girls walked out to the parking lot together, they found Hope sitting on the hood of Amy’s car, reading a book.

 

“Okay, let’s just tone down the Timothee Chalamet vibes you’ve got going on. Amy already knows you’re hot,” Annabelle said as she walked a few steps in front of the other two girls, pulling Hope’s book out of her hands as she passed the Volvo. She read the front cover and tossed it back to Hope before approaching her own car. Amy’s cheeks were already pink, but Annabelle’s comment made her go into full blush-mode as she walked over to the girl sitting on the hood of her car.

 

“Great. You made me lose my place. How am I supposed to rise above my pretty face if I’m never allowed to learn?” Hope replied, setting the book down next to her as she draped her arms around Amy’s torso. Amy leaned into the other girl’s chest and avoided Molly’s intense gaze.

 

Annabelle rolled her eyes as she unlocked her car and opened the driver’s door. “Kafka won’t make you any more enlightened than you already were. Try reading something from this century.”

 

“Try prying your nose from my ass,” Hope replied as Annabelle flipped her off and got into the car. Hope looked down at Amy with a smirk on her face as she raised her eyebrows. “Hey nerd,” She murmured, leaning down to give the freckled girl a kiss. 

 

Amy returned the kiss, placing her hand on the other girl’s shoulder. “Hey,” She said, a goofy smile spreading across her face.

 

Molly watched these interactions with different levels of incredulity. Her eyes bounced from each girl as the conversation took place, her face looking like she was attempting to solve a difficult mathematical equation. Her eyes widened a bit as she watched Amy and Hope’s exchange, but she decided not to say anything about it, for Amy’s sake. “I didn’t know you were friends with Triple A,” She said to Hope.

 

“Uh, Annabelle,” Amy corrected. 

 

Hope chuckled. “Friends is a generous term. We hang out at parties and sometimes acknowledge each other’s existence.” 

 

“That’s fair,” Molly replied. “So are you guys ditching me to fuck or am I still allowed my ride home?” 

 

Hope laughed as Amy shot Molly a look. “Don’t worry, Davidson, I’ll ride in the back,” Hope said. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so ya girl is back to updating regularly! this fic is getting a little longer than i had anticipated but im excited to write the rest of it. btw i changed my tumblr url to @imfuckingnertz so follow me if ur interested :) Hope y'all enjoyed this update & if you did, leave a comment letting me know! Thank u for reading <3


	6. Wrong Hole

During the next couple weeks, Molly and Amy successfully prepared for Homecoming, having consulted with both Student Council and Principal Brown to finalize their plans. They ended up hiring Tanner’s cousin as the DJ, and Jared took the news well because it came from Molly, who explained that she just wanted them to be together the whole night, which was also her way of asking him to the dance. Hope ended up asking Amy to the dance in a gesture that was so typical, it infuriated Molly and delighted Amy. During English, Hope had simply passed Amy a note that said, “Homecoming?” with two check-boxes that said “yes” and “hell yes.” Of course, Amy checked off both, being the dork she was.

 

Molly had been spending more and more time with Jared and occasionally Gigi when the girl decided to pop in. Jared even offered to drive her to school. Of course, Molly created a schedule in which she would ride with Amy on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday while Tuesdays and Thursdays were reserved for Jared. The first day Molly went to school with Jared, Amy pulled up about five minutes before the first bell rang as she usually did, only to find Jared’s car parked in the Class President’s spot. She never thought about the fact that she’d have to find a new spot and ended up in one all the way across the parking lot. She was late to homeroom that day. 

 

Amy went over to Hope’s house after school most days, leaving Molly to do homework in her apartment by herself. Amy didn’t get much homework done at Hope’s even though she tried. It didn’t help that Hope’s mom wouldn’t be around until nine. They’d always start out doing homework, but Hope would get bored easily and somehow end up on top of Amy in one form or another. Molly’s texts would go unanswered until Amy got home. 

 

Even though their schedules outside of school were changing, as soon as they stepped foot into Crockett High, Amy and Molly remained inseparable. Hope, Jared, and Gigi joined the two at their lunch table, and they almost resembled a clique. Word traveled fast around Crockett, and lots of people had something to say about this new social dynamic. Some people theorized that they were all cokeheads together, and it didn’t help that Gigi would often pull out her tin of special things at the worst times. Others weren’t phased by the formation of the group, having already labelled each of the five as entitled and snobbish in one way or another. Somehow the five students were content in their new little bubble, immune to outside conspiracies.

 

When the day of the Homecoming dance finally came around, Amy and Molly found themselves in the gym decorating with the rest of Student Council. They had decked out the gym in disco balls, balloons, and multicolored lights. There were two photo booth stations close to the entrance, and Molly had febrezed the shit out of every corner of the room. The rest of the group was setting out tables for refreshments when Amy and Molly decided to ditch to go over to Amy’s place and get ready. 

 

Amy’s outfit was a yellow and white striped sleeveless jumpsuit with flared pant legs. She pulled her hair back into a simple ponytail, and Molly had insisted she compliment the outfit with a little bit of yellow eyeliner. Molly herself wore a silver dress with long trumpet sleeves that cut off just above the knees. She used a long, flowy scarf of the same color as a headband. When they were finished getting ready, they hyped each other up with a classic exchange of compliments, attempting to one-up each other.

 

Jared was the first of the two dates to show up, his hair feathered, sporting a glittery silver shirt tucked into white flared pants. Doug and Charmaine obsessed over his dedication to the theme and the careful coordination the two had put into their outfits. Amy was a little nervous already, but her parents’ reaction to seeing Molly and Jared together made her even more anxious as she awaited Hope’s arrival.

 

Hope appeared at the front door not long after Jared arrived, wearing a white and yellow floral patterned button down with an extra button undone. She had paired the shirt with yellow flared pants and the always classic middle part. 

 

“Oh my gosh. I love it!” Charmaine exclaimed after opening the door and taking in Hope’s outfit. She beckoned the girl inside, where Amy awkwardly shuffled over to her, smiling as she did so. 

 

“Hey,” She said, looking up at the taller girl. 

 

“Hey dork,” Hope said, smirking down at Amy.

 

“You look great,” Amy said.

 

“So do you,” Hope replied, making no effort to hide the fact that she was checking the shorter girl out. “You’ll have to thank Molly for coordinating our outfits because it would actually be physically painful for me to admit that it was a good idea.”

 

“I heard that,” Molly interjected. “And you’re welcome.”

 

“Hey, can you give me an honest opinion of how my ass looks in these pants?” Jared asked, standing in a way that would accentuate his butt.

 

“Your ass is really not what you should be concerned about, Jared,” Hope replied. Molly shot her a glare. Amy chuckled as she took Hope’s hand in her own. 

 

“Okay you guys, let’s get some pictures,” Doug said as he held up a small digital camera, and Charmaine ushered the two couples in front of the staircase. Taking pictures became a whole debacle when neither Doug nor Charmaine could figure out how to use the camera and Amy had to show them. Her cheeks were red by the time she returned to her position next to Hope. 

 

“Okay, now everybody smile!” Charmaine said as she snapped a few pictures of the four of them. “Okay, now just Molly and Jared.” Hope and Amy moved to the side for a moment before getting reeled back in to pose for a picture of just the two of them. 

 

After the chaos of picture taking ended, the four of them piled into Jared’s car and headed to the dance. Amy and Hope sat in the back seat with almost no space between them, hands twisted together in Amy’s lap.

 

“You know, I’ve never actually been to Homecoming before,” Hope said, as though she had just realized this. “I’ve planned to go every year, and I’ve been dressed up and ready to go, but the people I was with would just say ‘fuck it’ and ditch last minute.”

 

“Well, this is predicted to be the best Homecoming dance to date according to Triple A,” Molly said. “So you’re in luck.” 

 

“Annabelle,” Amy corrected, and Molly waved a hand dismissively. “I guess we’ll have to fit four Homecomings into one night,” She said to Hope, a grin spreading across her face. 

 

Hope nodded. “Sounds good to me.”

 

Molly glanced back at Amy, and they made brief eye contact. They had discussed beforehand that tonight was the night they were gonna let loose and see what happens. Both of them had sent in all of their college applications, so they decided to allow themselves to have a little bit of fun. When Molly said “fun,” Amy knew that for the other girl, it implied losing her virginity to Jared. The girl hadn’t shut up about it since the night she had kissed him, and as happy as Amy was for her best friend, she couldn’t help but feel like she was the only one who had any anxiety surrounding sex. 

 

“In case you wanted, your first time can always be a threesome.“

 

Everyone in the car jumped at the sudden appearance of Gigi in the backseat. 

 

“How?” Amy yelled.

 

“Why?” Hope said, throwing her hands up in the air. 

 

“Jesus Christ,” Molly exclaimed. 

 

“Hey Geeg,” Jared said. 

 

“My offer will always stand,” Gigi murmured, leaning in to breathe in Amy’s scent. 

 

“Uh, that’s okay, Gigi,” Amy said. “I think we’re good.”

 

“Too bad. Both of you are so fucking hot,” Gigi said as she pulled out her tin of special things, opening it up to reveal a mountain of white powder. 

 

“Hold up. Is she doing coke?” Hope asked, furrowing her eyebrows at Molly and Jared’s lax reactions.

 

Jared looked back at Hope through the rear view mirror. “Don’t worry. It’s just crushed up vitamins.” 

 

“It’s true.” Gigi snorted some of her vitamins and put the tin away. “But I do have weed if you want it.”

 

“Oh, fuck yeah,” Molly said. 

 

Amy laughed at her best friend’s reaction and looked over at Hope whose eyebrows were raised practically to her hairline. “Davidson smokes weed?” She asked as Jared pulled into the school parking lot. Amy just leaned into the taller girl and hummed as she felt the girl’s arm wrap around her.

 

Molly scoffed. “I think the real shocker here is that Jared smokes.”

 

“I technically have asthma,” Jared said. “So I usually just take edibles. But you gotta do what you gotta do.”

 

Before heading into the dance, they hotboxed Jared’s car. Between the five of them, they smoked three joints, and ended up being almost an hour late. Tanner’s cousin, Cheese, seemed to be doing a good job DJing because there were more people on the dance floor when they walked in than they’d ever seen at one time. They immediately joined in, though they weren’t even close to the crowd of bodies. A chaperone – some young teacher none of them knew – led them over to one of the photo booths and they took a couple group photos before making their way onto the dance floor. 

 

Annabelle spotted the group almost immediately and casually walked over to them. She took one whiff of the air around them and said, “Holy shit. Hope, have you scandalized the nerds?”

 

Hope raised her eyebrows and chuckled as she twirled Amy around. “Gigi smoked us out.” She looked around, expecting to see Gigi standing next to Jared, but the other girl was nowhere to be found. 

 

“Of course,” Annabelle replied, smirking as she leaned closer to Molly. “Guess what I did, Davidson.”

 

“What did you do?” Molly asked, biting her bottom lip to stifle her laughter. 

 

“I spiked the punch.” Annabelle snorted, closing her eyes and leaning against Molly, who just giggled and held onto Annabelle’s arm for support. 

 

“I’m not even mad,” Molly said, turning to Jared and taking his hand. “Hey, let’s go get snacks,” She said before they disappeared into the crowd of dancing bodies. 

 

Amy watched the interaction between Annabelle and Molly carefully, an inquisitorial look on her face, but as Molly left with Jared, she relaxed, looking over at Hope. Annabelle seemed to have noticed Amy’s stare and stood up a little straighter, crossing her arms over her chest. “So, turns out that Homecoming isn’t awful,” She said. “But, if you guys are interested, there’s gonna be an after party at Nick’s place. The regular crowd’s gonna be there.”

 

Hope nodded. “Yeah, we’ll probably show up at some point.” 

 

“Well,” Annabelle smirked slightly and tilted her head to the side. “Get there before all the bedrooms are taken, sluts.” With that, she disappeared into the crowd, leaving Amy and Hope to dance by themselves. 

 

“Wanna go sit down for a minute?” Hope asked, raising her voice over the music and the rest of the noise. 

 

Amy just nodded as she led the taller girl over to the bleachers, where they sat and watched their classmates dance and interact. Hope furrowed her eyebrows slightly and leaned closer to Amy. “Is that Theo dancing with Miss Fine?” She asked. 

 

Amy looked in the same direction and laughed. “I think so.”

 

“Isn’t that, like, illegal?” Hope asked.

 

Amy shrugged. “Theo’s like twenty anyway. So maybe just morally questionable.”

 

Hope chuckled and leaned back, placing her elbows on the seats behind her and stretching her legs out over the bleachers. “This is kinda nice,” She said.

 

Amy rested her chin on her hand, looking back at the other girl. “Yeah?”

 

Hope nodded. “I usually hate school functions. I always kind of step back to watch everyone, and it’s almost like I can’t be part of it. It’s like there’s this invisible line that I can’t cross. But tonight is kinda different.”

 

“Are you part of it tonight or have I just stepped behind the line?” Amy asked.

 

“I don’t know,” Hope said, smiling slightly. “Maybe both.”

 

“You know you don’t have to be invited to be a part of it,” She said. “You can just join in.”

 

“Easy for you to say,” Hope murmured, smiling over at the other girl. 

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Well, you’re _part_ of the whole culture here,” Hope said. “And I love that you’re driven, but a lot of these other people...they’re so superficial about it. They’re like, ‘I have to be the president of _this_ club so that I can get into _this_ college and have all of the experiences my rich parents will buy for me. And I refuse to interact with anyone who won’t help me achieve my goals or make me look good.’”

 

Amy furrowed her eyebrows. “Is that how you think I am?”

 

“Before a few weeks ago, yeah,” Hope replied. “But not anymore.”

 

“But I’m different than the rest right?” Amy asked, a touch of hurt in her voice. 

 

“Hey,” Hope said, her expression growing softer than Amy had ever seen it. “I didn’t mean it like that. I just have a hard time understanding it all. It’s pretty much alien to me.”

 

Amy looked down at her feet. “I guess I get that. You know, Molly and I usually are all alone in our own bubble even though we look like we’re part of it all.” 

 

Hope nodded. “That makes sense. I mean, say what you want about Molly, but she doesn’t bullshit anybody. And neither of you seem to have time to be fake.”

 

Amy smirked at Hope and wiggled her eyebrows. “Good to know that I’m not like other girls,” She teased.

 

Hope rolled her eyes. “Come on,” She said, sitting up again, inching closer to Amy. “That’s not why I like you.”

 

“Then why do you like me?” She asked.

 

Hope shrugged. “You’re cute and smart,” She murmured, leaning in to kiss the girl before she could say anything else. 

 

//

 

Molly had wandered away from Jared after dancing and mingling with the other students for a while.  As she walked into the gender neutral bathroom, she heard faint giggling, but didn’t think much of it until she realized the lights had been turned off. “Seriously?” She posed the question mostly to herself, but she heard one person whisper something and another person shush them as she flipped the light switch on. She spotted two pairs of feet in one stall and rolled her eyes, proceeding to do her business in the next stall over. While she was in the middle of washing her hands, Molly looked up to grab a paper towel and saw Lacey Harris and Annabelle’s stumble out of the stall, holding hands and giggling. 

 

“Oh, hey Davidson,” Annabelle said as Lacey whispered something in her ear. 

 

“Too much punch?” Molly asked, not understanding the heavy burning sensation rising in her chest as she watched the two girls. 

 

Annabelle just laughed. “Maybe,” She murmured as Lacey wrapped her arms around the other girl’s torso.

 

Molly ripped a few paper towels out of the dispenser and quirked an eyebrow as she dried her hands. “I would say try not to give anyone roadside assistance tonight, but it looks like I’m too late.” She threw the used paper towels into the trash and left the bathroom, flipping the lights off behind her.

 

“Jeez, I thought you said she was kinda cool now,” Lacey said, furrowing her eyebrows as the two girls stood there in the darkness together.

 

Annabelle shrugged. “Guess she’s the same bitch she always was.”

 

//

 

After spending maybe an hour or so at the dance, most people had ditched either to go to Nick’s party or to go home. When Amy told Molly about Annabelle’s invitation, Molly convinced Jared that they should drop Hope and Amy off, then go to her place, as her mom was conveniently out of town for the weekend. Amy made Molly sit in the back of the car with her on the drive to Nick’s house. 

 

“Are you sure you want this?” Amy asked, keeping her voice low enough that only the two of them could hear.

 

Molly nodded. “It’s not a big deal.”

 

Amy looked her best friend in the eyes. “Molls, just because it’s not a big deal for other people doesn’t mean that it’s not a big deal for you.”

 

Molly took Amy’s hands in her own. “Amy, I’m glad you’re checking in, but I’m honestly ready.”

 

Amy nodded and glanced over at Hope who was riding shotgun. She and Jared were engaged in a heated discussion about Bob Dylan’s best album – subject matter she honestly didn’t expect Jared to care so much about. She looked back at Molly, still nodding. The other girl tilted her head to the side. “Ames, are you projecting right now?”

 

“Uh – ah, I...maybe,” She said, grimacing. 

 

Molly placed her hands on Amy’s cheeks and smiled. “Listen, Amy. Follow your heart. Don’t do anything you’re uncomfortable with. If you’re not ready, you’re not ready.”

 

Amy nodded and smiled meekly as Hope made eye contact with her, quirking an eyebrow at Molly’s grip on the girl’s face.

 

“Promise you’ll be safe,” Molly said as they pulled up to Nick’s house. 

 

Amy nodded. “Of course. You promise too, okay?”

 

“I swear,” Molly said, pulling the girl into a hug.

 

Amy realized that this was the first Homecoming night that she wouldn’t be spending with Molly as she got out of the car. Part of her felt devastated that the tradition wouldn’t carry on, but the feeling went away when Hope grabbed her hand, leading her up to the front door. The girl didn’t even bother to ring the doorbell or knock, she just walked right inside, pulling Amy in behind her. 

 

“Whoa, Amy Anstler,” Tanner, who was obviously already drunk, exclaimed. He was sitting on the couch sandwiched between Ryan and Theo. It looked like the party was in full swing. The house was full of people both girls recognized from school, all of them drinking and socializing together. 

 

“Salutatorian represent,” Theo said as he aimed a toy water gun at Amy, narrowly missing as he tried to squirt her with water. 

 

Ryan knocked the toy gun out of Theo’s hands, smacking him in the back of the head. “You’re gonna scare her off,” She said, laughing as she leaned back on the couch. “Hey, you guys should come sit with us.”

 

“Ah,” Amy started, already on edge at the prospect of having to interact with Ryan while Hope was right next to her. “O-okay.” The two girls sat down on the loveseat perpendicular to the couch the other three sat on. 

 

“Hey, you planned the dance right?” Ryan asked. “Cause you’re on Student Council and all that?”

 

Amy nodded. “Um, yeah,” She said, looking up at the ceiling, then back at Ryan. She honestly couldn’t believe that she had spent so much time agonizing over the skater girl for almost all of high school when Hope was always there in the background.

 

“It was pretty good this year,” She replied. “I mean, not that it wasn’t before–“

 

“It’s notoriously lame every year,” Hope interjected. “Triple A helped them plan it this year.” Amy raised an eyebrow at Hope’s use of Annabelle’s infamous nickname. 

 

“Oh, man, I love that girl,” Ryan said, grinning. 

 

“Yeah, she invited us here,” Amy said. “To – to this party.”

 

Ryan nodded. Amy couldn’t believe that she was still getting flustered over a girl who she didn’t even like anymore. 

 

Hope furrowed her eyebrows slightly. “Is she here yet?” She asked, looking around the room.

 

“I saw her duck into a room with Lacey Harris when she got here like half an hour ago,” Tanner said, smirking. “Haven’t seen her since.”

 

“Whoa,” Amy said. “I didn’t know Annabelle was into girls.” The comment Annabelle had made to her in the library had finally clicked. She was talking from experience when she said dating a girl is the same as dating a guy.

 

“It’s a relatively new development,” Theo said. 

 

“No it’s not,” Hope said, a smirk spreading across her face.

 

Theo rolled his eyes. “New to us.”

 

Amy looked from Theo to Hope, confused, but too nervous to ask either of them to elaborate. “That’s, uh, that’s...cool.” 

 

“Speaking of being into girls,” Tanner began, but Theo smacked his arm before he could continue. 

 

“Dude, you can’t ask shit like that,” Theo said.

 

“Shit like what?” Amy asked.

 

“Well, everybody kinda wants to know what’s up with the two of you recently,” Ryan said. 

 

Amy raised her eyebrows and gestured to herself and Hope. “Us?”

 

All three of them nodded in unison.

 

“Uh, ah, well –” Amy glanced at Ryan, then at her hands. 

 

“Yeah, and that’s our cue to leave,” Hope said, standing up and grabbing Amy’s hand before venturing further into the house. They stopped in the kitchen, where all of the liquor sat on the island in a sort of makeshift bar. Hope dropped Amy’s hand before reaching for the stack of red solo cups, pulling two off the top. She scanned the line of bottles and murmured, “Where the fuck are the mixers?” as she turned to open the refrigerator. 

 

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” Amy said as she watched the girl raid the fridge. She looked around the kitchen, which was uncharacteristically empty considering the amount of people that they had to maneuver through to get there.

 

Hope pulled out a bottle of tonic water and set it on the counter. “If Nick cared about people going through his fridge, he would have set the mixers out,” She said, shrugging at the other girl. Amy relaxed a little at Hope’s words, letting herself take a deep breath. “Do you want a gin and tonic or should I make something else for you?” 

 

Amy shrugged. “I– uh, I’ll try it,” She replied as she watched Hope open the tonic water, pouring some in both cups. Hope scanned the island and grabbed a bottle of Seagram’s gin, pouring some into both cups as well. She looked around and rolled her eyes, grumbling about Nick doing absolutely nothing to prepare for his own party. 

 

Amy was having a hard time comprehending how comfortable Hope seemed to be in this situation while she was having a little bit of an internal meltdown fueled by social anxiety. “So, Nick throws parties pretty often, huh?” She asked as she watched the girl searching through the kitchen drawers.

 

Hope quirked an eyebrow at Amy as she pulled a spoon from the drawer she had been rummaging through. “Yeah,” She replied, using the spoon to mix the drinks. She furrowed her eyebrows and tilted her head to the side like she had just realized something. “Well, this is his first party since the one he threw for the end of summer. But it seems like his dad is always flying out to New York for work stuff on the weekends, and I think his mom lives in Sacramento. It’s actually kind of weird how familiar I am with this house considering I literally never associate with Nick outside of these parties.” She set the spoon down on the counter. Hope handed Amy one cup and took a sip out of the other.  

 

Amy took a sip from her own cup and nodded, leaning against the counter. “Why don’t you? Associate with these people at school, I mean.”

 

“We really don’t have much in common,” Hope said. “But Triple A kind of tried to recruit me into their group during sophomore year and invited me to a party.”

 

Amy furrowed her eyebrows. She found it difficult to discern what exactly the nature of Annabelle and Hope’s relationship was. “Why do you call her that if she’s kind of your friend?” She asked. 

 

Hope looked a little surprised by the question. “I mean, I usually don’t,” She started. “I guess I don’t want you to get the wrong impression.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I don’t want you to think that I like her.”

 

Amy laughed. “You really think that I would assume you were into Annabelle just because she’s your friend and also into girls?”

 

Hope took another sip of her drink. “I mean, not exactly.” 

 

Amy watched Hope as the girl avoided eye contact by looking up at the ceiling. She furrowed her eyebrows, attempting to put together what Hope wouldn’t say, and it suddenly dawned on her. “Oh–” She murmured, pulling her head back and stepping away from the counter as though some invisible fist had just tried to take a shot at her. “You, um, so like, you _were_ into her?” 

 

Hope sighed and shifted her weight from one leg to the other. This was a conversation she was hoping to just avoid completely. “Not in the way you think,” She replied.

 

“Mm.” Amy raised her eyebrows quickly and took a gulp of her drink. She knew that the feeling deep in her stomach was jealousy, and that it was a result of social conditioning by the heteropatriarchy to pit herself against other women, and besides that, it was _so_ cliché. Still, she couldn’t help but think about the vast differences between Annabelle and herself, and she couldn’t help but feel insecure. “Wh-what do you think I’m thinking?” She asked.

 

“Listen,” Hope said, finally looking Amy in the eyes. “We used to hook up at these things sometimes. It was never anything more than that for either of us because it would only happen when we got really drunk. It stopped last year when I came out. She told me we should keep our distance because she didn’t want people to think she was a dyke like me. We didn’t talk for a while after that, and after she came out as bi this summer, she reached out to apologize for her bullshit, and we’re kinda friends now.”

 

“Oh,” Amy said, trying to register the overload of information. 

 

“I didn’t bring it up earlier because I didn’t want you to freak out,” Hope said, concerned by Amy’s lack of response. “I don’t know. Maybe I should have told you upfront. It just didn’t seem urgent because it wasn’t a relationship at all. I mean, she’s not even my type. She’s way too much like me.” 

 

Amy watched Hope ramble with her jaw slack. “Did I break you?” She asked, chuckling. Amy had never seen Hope so vulnerable. 

 

Hope’s eyes widened at the girl’s words. She felt almost too seen, and she just wanted to sink into the floor. “Well,” She started, but quickly stopped herself from rambling and making even more of a fool of herself. She just shrugged. “So it’s not an issue?” She asked as she leaned back against the countertop.

 

Amy shook her head. “No,” She said, and she meant it. She figured that Annabelle had been as close as Hope had ever gotten to having a friendship like the one Amy had with Molly, and Amy couldn’t imagine Molly suddenly turning on her. She felt sorry for Hope, but she didn’t want to say it in case it might come off as condescending. So instead of saying anything, she walked over to Hope in two strides, set her cup on the counter next to the girl, and reached up to fix the collar of the girl’s shirt, which was sticking out at a slightly wrong angle. “Sorry,” Amy chuckled. “This was bothering me.” She smoothed down the fabric, and Hope just giggled. 

 

“Nerd,” She murmured as she snaked her arms around the other girl’s torso. Amy just smiled as she stood up on her toes to kiss the girl. Just a moment later, Hope felt a slight breeze blow across her back.

 

“Drinking games in the basement right now, ladies. Let’s go!” 

 

The two girls jumped away from each other. Amy looked around Hope’s shoulder to see Gigi leaning into the kitchen through the window over the sink. “How?”

 

“Every time!” Hope said as she turned to face Gigi. 

 

“Come on,” Gigi said as she climbed through the window and grabbed both of their hands.

 

“Why were you outside the kitchen window?” Amy asked as they were being dragged downstairs. 

 

Gigi looked at her, a bewildered expression on her face. “Catching frogs. Duh.”

 

Hope flashed Amy a jaded expression as they came to the bottom of the stairs, where Theo, Tanner, Ryan, Annabelle, Lacey Harris, and Nick all sat together on the floor in a circle. 

 

“Holy shit,” Nick exclaimed when he saw Amy, standing up to greet her. “They told me the salutatorian was here, but I chalked that up to drunken nonsense.” He knelt on one knee in front of her with a hand held out. 

 

Amy tentatively gave Nick her hand, and he put his other hand over hers. “I mean, technically we have two semesters left. I could fail all my classes, and Ajay Patel could easily –”

 

“Fuck Ajay Patel,” Nick interjected. Hope chuckled as she sat down next to Tanner and watched the interaction. “Where’s Madam President?” 

 

“Oh, she’s –”

 

“Getting laid,” Gigi responded as she sat next to down and patted the space between Hope and herself, motioning for Amy to sit, which the other girl did, eager to get her hand out of Nick’s grasp. 

 

“Good for her,” Nick said, sitting on the other side of Gigi. “So we’re all gonna take two shots, and then we’re gonna play Straight Face.” Tanner handed Nick a bottle of Svedka. “And yes, I could only find four shot glasses in this entire house,” He said as he poured four shots. “So it’s me and Gigi first.”

 

“Bottoms up, bitch,” Gigi said, picking up one of the glasses and downing it, then chasing it with the other. Nick chuckled and did the same before handing the bottle of Svedka to Amy, who poured four shots for herself and Hope. Everyone took their shots and passed the bottle around until it came back to Nick. 

 

“Okay, for anyone who hasn’t played, essentially we’re all writing something funny on a piece of paper and throwing it in a hat. Each person pulls a paper out of the hat and has to try to read it with a straight face.”

 

“This might be the lamest drinking game I’ve ever played,” Theo said as Nick passed around a few pens and pads of sticky notes. 

 

“Only because nobody laughs at your jokes,” Nick quipped.

 

“Okay, let me just make you my bitch in this game real quick,” Theo said, scribbling something onto his sticky note.

 

After a minute, everyone had thrown their sticky notes into the hat, and Nick was pulling one out. “Nick lost his virginity to an old woman under an overpass. And that old woman was Principal Brown,” Nick read with a completely straight face. He looked over at Theo, shaking his head.

 

“Oh, come on, that one was good,” Theo said. 

 

Gigi went next. “Once I saw Tanner fart in Nick’s pool and it literally propelled him forward, but I had to act like I didn’t see it because he looked so embarrassed already.” Gigi’s face remained completely straight as she said it. 

 

“What the _fuck_? Who’s exposing me like that?” Tanner exclaimed as everyone else laughed.

 

“It was like one of the weirdest things I’ve ever witnessed, not gonna lie,” Annabelle said. 

 

“I know a specialist who can take a look at your anus and give you a diagnosis,” Gigi said to Tanner. 

 

Amy reached into the hat and pulled out a sticky note. Amy chuckled before she even started reading, but she read it out loud anyway. “Was anybody going to tell me that Hope and Amy were dating or was I just supposed to see them making out on the bleachers at Homecoming myself?” 

 

“This game sucks,” Theo said. “Let’s play spin the bottle.” 

 

Hope sighed and stood up from the circle, holding her hand out to help Amy up.

 

“Oh shit,” Tanner said. “Theo, look what you did. She has _one_ rule.”

 

“One rule?” Amy asked as she took Hope’s hand, getting up as well.

 

“Hope has this rule that she has to leave a party when someone suggests we play spin the bottle,” Nick explained.

 

Amy chuckled and looked up at the girl who just shrugged. “It’s a good rule.”

 

Everyone voiced their goodbyes to Amy and Hope as they made their way back up the stairs. 

 

“Are we really leaving?” Amy asked. 

 

“Not if you don’t want to,” Hope replied as they stood in the hallway between the living room and the kitchen. She thought the party had simply died down significantly in the short time they had been there until she glanced down the hallway and saw, through the sliding porch door, that almost everyone was hanging out around the pool.  

 

Amy smiled slightly. “I don’t care if we stay here, but I don’t want it to end yet,” She murmured. “Do you, um, wanna find somewhere we can be alone?” Amy’s eyebrows knitted together the way they do when she’s concentrating intensely on something or just thinking too much.

 

“Yeah, sure,” Hope said, nodding. “I mean, if you want to.”

 

“Yeah, I do,” Amy said, nodding as she looked up at the girl. Hope led the other girl upstairs into what Amy guessed was the guest bedroom by the impersonal decor. Hope sat down on the bed as Amy shut the door behind them.

 

“Hooking up at other people’s houses is weird enough,” She said. “I try not to do it in the host’s bed.”

 

Amy nodded and chuckled as she sat next to Hope on the edge of the bed. “Do you have any other party rules?” She asked. 

 

“I don’t really have rules as much as I just follow the law of common sense,” She replied, leaning closer to the other girl. 

 

“That’s smart,” Amy murmured, biting her bottom lip as she watched Hope watch her. There was a long silence between them, and this was the moment Amy had been waiting for the entire night. She was alone with Hope in a bedroom. To be fair, she had been alone with Hope in a bedroom plenty of times, but they’d never done anything more than making out and mild over-the-clothes groping. 

 

Hope leaned in closer, and Amy’s bottom lip slipped out from between her teeth. She breathed in deeply as Hope kissed her, placing a hand on the taller girl’s cheek. Hope pulled away after a moment and the two girls looked at each other before Amy pulled her back in, connecting their lips once again. The kiss was less soft than the last one – more intense. Hope gently pushed the other girl back onto the bed, moving so that she was on top as they kissed. Amy placed her hands on the taller girl’s shoulders and let out a small breath as she felt Hope’s weight settle between her legs. 

 

Hope reached behind Amy’s neck to untie the string that held up the girl’s jumpsuit. “Shit,” She mumbled as she realized that she’d have to take off the girl’s wedges before the jumpsuit came off. Amy laughed as Hope smirked and grabbed her ankles. “Is there anything less sexy than taking someone’s shoes off?” Hope joked. 

 

Amy helped the girl in taking off her shoes and laid back on the bed, looking up at Hope. “So you’re telling me that you don’t have a foot fetish?”

 

“Nope,” Hope murmured, moving back to her position hovering over the girl. 

 

“Disappointing.” Amy smirked, quirking an eyebrow.

 

Hope rolled her eyes and moved in to kiss the freckled girl again. Amy began to unbutton Hope’s shirt as she slipped her tongue into the girl’s mouth. The taller girl continued where she left off, completely untying the string that held the top half of Amy’s jumpsuit up, pulling the fabric down until Amy kicked it off onto the floor. Hope pulled away from the kiss for a moment and smirked slightly as she looked down at Amy. “No bra?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.

 

Amy just shrugged as she pulled the girl in for a brief kiss. “Backless jumpsuit, plus small boobs,” She murmured, managing to pull Hope’s shirt off and throw it on the floor. Hope nodded and reached around to take off her own bra, throwing it into the heap with the other clothes as she began to kiss down Amy’s neck. The freckled girl’s breath hitched as she felt the girl’s lips move down her chest and stomach. 

 

She looked at Hope between her legs as the girl pulled her panties down. “You good?” Hope asked, placing her hands on the insides of Amy’s thighs.

 

“Yeah. I’m _really_ good,” Amy mumbled, her cheeks turning red. Hope nodded and smirked slightly before kissing up the girl’s thigh and slowly dragging her tongue up the girl’s entrance and around her clit. Amy let out a soft moan when she felt Hope’s tongue against her for the first time, and held her breath as the girl kept at it, over and over. 

 

Amy ran her hands through the taller girl’s hair as she continued, slowly starting to move her hips along with the girl’s rhythm. After a while, Hope looked up at Amy, whose jaw was slack and eyes were closed, and ran her hand up the girl’s thigh. As Amy’s moans came faster, Hope slid a finger inside the girl, repeatedly curling it back and forth. Amy began to tense up, pulling Hope’s hair. Her moans grew louder as Hope moved her tongue and finger faster. “Holy shit,” Amy mumbled, her breath hitching, as a wave of pleasure flowed over her. She opened her eyes and relaxed against the bed as Hope grinned and climbed up to kiss the girl. 

 

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” Hope said.

 

Amy nodded. “Definitely,” She replied, going in for another kiss as she unbuttoned and unzipped Hope’s pants. 

 

“Shoes,” Hope murmured, giggling against Amy’s lips as the other girl began to tug the pants down her legs. Amy chuckled and sat up, leaning down to untie the laces of Hope’s oxfords. 

 

“Do you want to keep the socks on or off?” Amy asked when she finally got both shoes off the girl’s feet. She wiggled her eyebrows as she spoke.

 

Hope scoffed. “Off. I’m not a freak,” She said. Amy laughed as pulled the girl’s socks off, and Hope helped her out by sliding her pants off as well. The freckled girl laid back again, easily connecting their lips again. She ran her hand over Hope’s bare skin, stopping on her stomach just above the hem of her underwear. She gently drew circles on the skin there with her fingers for a moment before she gained the courage to slide her hand inside. Her fingers fumbled around for anything. Amy quickly realized that though they were both girls, it was completely different than simply masturbating. Her fingers found what she assumed to be the right hole, and Hope gasped slightly. Amy quickly pulled away from the girl’s lips to ask, “I-is that good for you?” 

 

Hope raised her eyebrows slightly and held onto Amy’s shoulder. “I..don’t think that’s the hole you think it is,” She whispered.

 

“Oh god,” Amy said, pulling herself away from the girl and closing her eyes, trying not to panic. “Oh god. Oh god. I’m so sorry.”

 

“It’s okay–”

 

“I just thought – I’ve never approached it from that angle before, and my geometry was off,” Amy rambled, her cheeks red. “Oh god. I’m so sorry,” She said as she got off the bed, collecting her clothes.

 

“Where are you going?” Hope asked, furrowing her eyebrows. “Amy, it’s really not that big of a deal.” 

 

Amy already had her jumpsuit on, and was tying the string behind her neck. “This was a mistake. I’m an idiot. I’m so so sorry,” She mumbled as she left the room, avoiding eye contact with Hope, leaving Hope and her shoes behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was difficult to write for some reason, and it took a little bit of time, but hey! I got it done :) Let me know what y'all think! Hope y'all enjoy this one!
> 
> Also a reminder that you can keep up with my shenanigans over @ imfuckingnertz.tumblr.com


	7. Take Everything Away, I Want Blank

Hope didn’t text Amy the rest of the weekend. Sure, she unlocked her phone and opened their messages a million times, and once she almost started typing, but she couldn’t bring herself to send anything. Even if she had wanted to, she had no idea what she would say.  _ Sorry you freaked out after accidentally fingering my butthole, wanna try again? _ Absolutely not. She was still trying to figure out how she felt about the situation. She didn’t think that she owed Amy anything after what happened – certainly not a text.

 

Even after she told Molly over Sunday brunch and the following hugs and pep-talks and jokes, Amy still felt like she was staring down the barrel of a gun when she was looking at Hope’s name on her phone screen. She felt a little bit better after talking the circumstances out with Molly, but she was still embarrassed at the way she had reacted. Every time she started to type out a sentence, all she could think of was how awful Hope must have felt to be left alone in that room. 

 

As the day passed with no word from Amy, Hope grew even more irritated. She couldn’t comprehend why Amy hadn’t texted her yet. Maybe Amy really  _ was  _ a coward after all. Maybe whatever they had going on was more effort than it was worth. Even though she was pissed, Hope couldn’t get the freckled girl off her mind. How everything went from so good to so bad, the look on her face as she left the room, the look on her face as she came – all of it kept running through Hope’s head like a movie reel. It didn’t help that she hadn’t moved Amy’s shoes from the trunk in front of her bed. She didn’t know if she even planned on returning them. 

 

For the first half of the next week, Hope skipped all of the classes that she had with Amy and took precautions to avoid any interactions with the other girl. Of course, Hope knew that she couldn’t keep skipping and expecting her teachers to catch her up after class. She also knew that the longer she avoided Amy, the more inevitable their eventual interaction would become. 

 

Amy knew she had screwed up big time when she didn’t see Hope at school for three days. Molly was furious. She quickly found out that Hope wasn’t simply ditching school, but was actively avoiding Amy, and ended up cornering the girl in the gender neutral bathroom. 

 

“What the fuck, dude?” Molly said as she walked into the bathroom behind Hope.

 

The taller girl jumped, not having realized that Molly was following her. “Jesus Christ, Davidson,” She said. “You’re turning into Gigi.”

 

Molly made sure to lock the door behind them. “You have some explaining to do, my friend,” She said, crossing her arms over her chest. 

 

“I don’t have to explain myself to you,” Hope said, leaning against the wall. “And unlock the fucking door, Nancy Drew.” 

 

“You know what?” Molly threw her arms into the air, obviously exasperated. “Maybe this is all my fault.” 

 

“Wow,” Hope said. “I never thought I’d see the day Molly Davidson admits her own faults.” 

 

“Oh, yeah, I bet it’s rich to hear it coming from me,” Molly replied. “Because  _ you’re  _ so perfect with your symmetrical face and your above-it-all attitude, and you can treat anyone you want like shit because of it.”

 

“You’re right,” Hope said, crossing her arms. “It  _ is  _ rich to hear it coming from you.”

 

“You’re so full of shit. You don’t want to face Amy because you’re fucking scared,” Molly said.

 

Hope scoffed. “Scared of what?”

 

“Scared to acknowledge that you actually might like her,” Molly said. “You’re sabotaging it so you don’t get hurt, and we both know that. But you know who doesn’t know that? Amy. She is devastated, Hope.”

 

Hope looked down at the floor and shook her head. She couldn’t believe that this conversation was even happening. “I’m sorry to hear that, but I wouldn’t know because she never bothered to tell me after she used me to have a bunch of formative lesbian experiences and then ditched me.”

 

Molly’s eyes narrowed. “That’s bullshit, and you know it.”

 

Hope looked back up at the girl and nodded thoughtfully. She felt the hostility rising in her chest, and she couldn’t help but spew it out like vomit. “You know what? You’re right, Davidson. It is bullshit. Because what it all boils down to is that Amy is a coward. Always has been, always will be. And you know how I know that? It’s because you’re here advocating on her behalf. She can’t fucking talk to me herself? It’s fucking  _ pathetic _ .”

 

Molly’s jaw had dropped slightly as she just stared at the other girl. 

 

“Amy can’t live without you – she’s a parasite. These past few weeks, you’ve been so shocked to see her do things on her own like she’s some toddler that’s learning how to walk. You enable it. You enable  _ her _ ,” Hope continued. She didn’t believe any of what she was saying, but she knew that it would jab Molly where it hurt most and would get the girl to leave her alone. 

 

“Okay, Hope,” Molly said quietly. “Okay.” She unlocked the door and left as quietly as she had entered. 

 

The day after the bathroom incident, Hope decided that there was no point in hiding anymore. In Miss Ramos’s class, she had been pretending to read the same page of her book for five minutes when Molly walked into the room and sat down in her seat. Hope figured that Amy must have been sick until the freckled girl walked in about two minutes later. Her eyes immediately landed on Hope, but she quickly looked away, biting her bottom lip as she took her seat. Hope was perplexed. Amy and Molly never arrived at a class they shared without each other. Even more puzzling was their brief interaction. 

 

“Hey Molls,” Amy said, giving the girl a grin.

 

“Hi,” Molly said as though she were annoyed, without even looking up from her notebook. Amy turned in her seat to face the front of the class, eyebrows furrowed like even she couldn’t understand why Molly was acting strange. 

 

The rest of the day passed, and this weird energy between Molly and Amy persisted, and almost everyone noticed it. Hope saw Amy sitting alone at their usual lunch table. She briefly wondered what the fuck Davidson was up to when she spotted Molly and Jared eating together outside the front entrance of the school. Hope stayed after school, grabbing the same spot by the window on the second floor of the library that she sat at weeks ago, listening to the Student Council meeting. This time, she just looked out the window and watched her classmates leave. She noticed that Jared’s car was parked in the Class President’s spot, but that was normal for a Thursday evening. Amy’s car was still in the parking lot, which Hope found strange because Amy rarely ever had anything going on after school on Thursdays. Maybe she was making up a test or getting extra help, Hope thought for a moment, until she remembered that Amy had perfect attendance and she had never once seen Amy struggle with any coursework. 

 

Hope turned away from the window when it finally dawned on her. Under the circumstances, she knew exactly where Amy would be, but before she could think it over, somehow those brown puppy dog eyes were staring at her with unease. Amy stood there, in the middle of the stacks, a pile of books in her hands, as she stared at Hope and Hope stared back. Just as Amy bit her bottom lip and began to turn around, Hope said, “Hey.”

 

Hope didn’t know why she did it, and she immediately felt a sinking feeling in her stomach. There was something about seeing the other girl standing there in all her discomfort, and somehow Hope still wanted to jump her bones. 

 

A hint of a smile appeared on Amy’s face as she spun back around to look at Hope. “Hi,” She said, shifting the pile of books to rest on her right hip. “”Wh-What are you doing here?” She asked. “I mean, not that the library isn’t a resource for all Crockett students, you know, I just know you don’t hang out here, uh, often.” Amy gulped as she began to rock back and forth on her heels.

 

Hope just shrugged. “What are  _ you  _ doing here?”

 

Amy chuckled. “I mean, I practically live here, so…”

 

A hint of a smile crept up Hope’s face, making Amy break out into a full grin. “You gonna sit or?” Hope trailed off, gesturing to the seat across from her.

 

Amy nodded quickly. “Uh, yeah. Sure,” She said as she set her books on the table and took a seat. 

 

“What are these books for?” Hope asked, not because she really cared, but because she had asked the girl to sit before she could figure out what she wanted to say.

 

“Oh, uh, research for my bias in the media paper for AP Gov.”

 

Hope nodded. She figured it’d be something dorky like that. She didn’t bother to say anything else, which she could tell made Amy uncomfortable. 

 

“You have my shoes,” Amy blurted out into the silence. “Or, um, I mean, I left them with you at Nick’s.”

 

“That and your virginity,” Hope replied.

 

Amy’s cheeks began to turn red, and she looked down at the desk. “Ah – I was wondering if I could get them back. Uh, the shoes, I mean. That other thing, ah, you can keep it.”

 

“Yeah, I was planning on it,” Hope said, chuckling. “But I guess you can have your shoes back.”

 

“Listen,” Amy said, looking back up at Hope. “I’m sorry about the way I reacted the other night. I just don’t really know what I’m doing with all of that stuff yet.”

 

“Well, for someone who doesn’t really know what they’re doing, you kinda know what you’re doing.” With that, Hope stood up and left Amy to sit there in her own confusion.

 

//

 

Molly had taken what Hope said about enabling Amy to heart. When she left the gender neutral bathroom, she had decided to give their friendship some space. She wanted Amy to be able to handle herself on her own. There was also some part of her that secretly feared that she relied on Amy just as much as Amy relied on her, and she felt a serious need to take that control back. Molly could not for the life of her figure out how to let Amy breathe without shutting her best friend out the way she had shut everyone else out, and she didn’t even realize it. Over the next week, she cut out Amy’s presence in her life completely aside from school and extracurriculars. Jared drove her to school every day of the week, and she hung out with him and sometimes Gigi after school when she had time. She limited her conversation with Amy during the day. It was actually easier than she thought it would be, probably because she was in the beginning stages of her first serious relationship, and Jared was pretty much all she could think or talk about. Molly and Jared couldn’t get enough of each other, and it didn’t help that Molly’s mom was literally never home. Or that Jared’s house was big enough that they could successfully hide from his parents. 

 

Amy felt Molly’s distance, but she figured it was just a phase, and as soon as she got tired of being around Jared all the time and set some boundaries, everything would go back to normal. The first week passed, and she felt a little neglected, but was convinced it would be okay eventually. She found more time to read and play her autoharp and watch documentaries without Molly around constantly occupying her attention. It was almost nice.

 

But then two weeks passed, along with Halloween. Amy stayed home on Halloween night, watching scary movies on her laptop in her room. She and Molly had dressed up together every year since they were eight, but the other girl hadn’t been receptive at all to the idea this year even though they had previously discussed going as the twin girls from The Shining. She mentioned something about having plans with Jared and quickly changed the topic. On the outside, Amy appeared no different than she had been before it all, but not having her best friend around – hell, not having anyone around – was getting to her. No matter how hard she tried, she could not get Molly to pay more than an ounce of attention to her. 

 

Then three weeks passed, and she gave up trying to win Molly’s attention. She finally texted Hope about getting her shoes back. She had been too nervous after the library incident, not really knowing where she stood with Hope, but she honestly really just wanted her shoes back. She wasn’t surprised to see Hope already waiting outside as she pulled up to the girl’s house one day before school. Amy got out of the car, and could see that Hope was holding a plastic grocery bag in one hand. She shuffled over to the girl, and they exchanged mutual shy greetings. There was an awkward pause before Hope handed Amy the bag. 

 

“Thanks,” Amy said, looking inside the bag. There were her shoes, just as she remembered them. 

 

“No problem.”

 

Amy couldn’t tell if Hope was pissed off or if she was just grumpy about being awake so early. “Hey, uh, do you want, um, a ride? To school, I mean.”

 

Hope raised an eyebrow and shrugged. “Sure.”

 

“Cool,” Amy replied, turning back to get into her car as Hope walked around to the passenger side. “So,” Amy cleared her throat. “H-how are you?” Hope climbed into the vehicle, her legs awkwardly crunched up against the glove compartment.

 

“I’m fine,” Hope said. “How are  _ you _ ?” She asked, looking over at Amy as the girl pulled out of the driveway. She had been closely observing whatever shitshow that had been going on between Molly and Amy for the past few weeks and genuinely wanted to know.

 

“Oh, you know,” Amy said, her voice suddenly raising an octave. “I’m good.” She kept her eyes on the road.

 

“Fight with the wife?”

 

Amy gulped and tightened her grip on the wheel. “No.”

 

“Oh,” Hope said, leaning her head back against the headrest. “So it doesn’t bother you that she doesn’t sit with you at lunch anymore?”

 

“Well,  _ you  _ don’t sit with me at lunch anymore,” Amy deflected. 

 

Hope raised her eyebrows. She didn’t think Amy had the backbone to call her out like that. “Well, I wasn’t your best friend for ten years.”

 

“Yeah, but you were my –” Amy stopped herself, unsure about what she was going to say. 

 

“I was your what?” 

 

Amy glanced over at the taller girl, then turned her eyes back on the road. “Uh, it’s – nothing.” She shook her head. “You know, I can’t tell if you like me or hate me recently.”

 

Hope stared out the window. “I don’t hate you,” She said. “I guess I just don’t understand you.”

 

Amy furrowed her eyebrows. “What don’t you understand?”

 

Hope scowled and crossed her arms as Amy pulled into the school parking lot. “Why you left when I said it was okay. It was just shitty.”

 

Amy parked toward the back of the lot, sighing as she shut off the engine. “I know. I got scared, and I ran away, and it was a really shitty thing to do, but it was one moment of poor judgement.” 

 

Hope looked over at the girl, who had shifted completely in her seat to face the taller girl. “I already apologized, so I don’t know what else you want me to do,” Amy said. “And I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m kind of going through a rough time here.” Her voice cracked slightly as she spoke. “I mean, is this how it feels for you?”

 

“How what feels for me?”

 

“Being on your own all the time? It’s driving me insane.”

 

Hope chuckled. “I think you’re definitely more of a people person than me, but yeah, pretty much.”

 

Amy looked down at her hands. “It sucks.”

 

“It’s not that bad,” Hope replied. “Look at it this way: Molly’s going through a phase. She’s trying on new identities. Why wallow in self-pity because she ditched you when you could just do the same thing?”

 

“It’s not that easy.”

 

“Maybe not,” Hope said. “Try doing something you’ve always wanted to do but were afraid of what Molly would say.”

 

Amy thought about what Hope had said for the rest of the day. For someone who isolated herself from others on purpose, it was actually pretty sound advice. Over the next week, Amy made a list of all the things she wasn’t really allowed to be interested in when she was friends with Molly. She wasn’t surprised that Theatre topped her list. Drama club was just one of the things she had always wanted to do but was too afraid of what Molly or anyone else would say. The next week, she gathered up the courage to corner George and made him take her to rehearsal after school. 

 

“If you insist on being here, you might as well make yourself useful,” He said as they walked into the auditorium. He pointed to two giant slabs of wood lying on top of a large tarp. Next to the boards were a number of paintbrushes and a bucket of white paint. “Those are the signs we’re putting up outside the school. You can go ahead and start the base layer of paint. Annabelle will probably be in to help you soon.”

 

“Annabelle?” Amy asked, confused.

 

“Yes, oh my god,” George replied. “Why does everyone act surprised that Annabelle’s in Theatre like she’s not one of the most dramatic bitches at this school?”

 

“Did you finish listening to the Dear Evan Hanson soundtrack this morning?” Alan asked from across the stage. 

 

George rolled his eyes. “No, and I’m irritable, okay?” He went over to join Alan and the other actors. 

 

Amy went to work on the boards as rehearsal started. She knew that Drama club was entirely student run at Crockett, but she didn’t realize how much work these kids actually did. There were people running around doing all kinds of things that she didn’t think much about when she went to see the plays they put on. People were putting together and labelling costumes, building the set, painting the parts of the set that were already built, discussing advertising for the show – you name it, there was a group of kids doing it. 

 

“Debate club got you down?” Annabelle asked as she approached Amy from behind, plopping down on the tarp next to her.

 

Amy shook her head. “Uh, no, just trying something new,” She said. 

 

Annabelle smirked as she picked up a paintbrush. “Does Davidson know you’re here?” 

 

“Um, no,” Amy said, shaking her head.

 

“That’s good. She’d probably shit her pants if she did.” Annabelle chuckled as she started painting the second board. 

 

Amy smiled. “Yeah, probably.”

 

“What’s up with Davidson now, though?” Annabelle asked, trying to come off as casual as possible. “She fucked Jared so now she thinks she’s the heir to his family’s fortune and too good for everyone else or?”

 

“Uh, well, I don’t really know,” Amy said. “We don’t talk outside of school anymore.”

 

Annabelle scoffed. “You know, she claims to be a feminist, but loses her brain as soon as she gets into a relationship with a guy. It’s pathetic.”

 

Amy could feel a tension in Annabelle that she didn’t really want to address that day, so she quickly changed the subject. “I didn’t realize you were a Theatre kid.” 

 

Annabelle shrugged. “I like improv games, and they let me design the logos for their shows.”

 

“That’s awesome,” Amy said. “I didn’t know you were into graphic design.”

 

“Seems like you don’t know a lot about me, Anstler.”  Annabelle laughed. “But yeah, I guess graphic design is my passion,” She joked. 

 

Amy chuckled. “Is that what you want to do? As, like, a career?”

 

“I mean, it’d be pretty cool, wouldn’t it?” 

 

Amy nodded. “Where’d you apply for school?” She asked. “I mean, I know Principal Brown’s policy–”

 

“It’s okay,” Annabelle said. “That policy’s dumb anyway. I applied to RISD, Yale, and CalArts. They have some of the top graphic design programs in the country, but I’m really hoping for Yale.”

 

Amy’s jaw dropped, and she actually started laughing. “Oh my god,” She said. “Molly would be going crazy right now if she knew that.”

 

Annabelle furrowed her eyebrows. “Why?”

 

“It’s just...she’s convinced that nobody else at this school is getting good grades besides us – uh, I mean, me and her.” 

 

Annabelle snorted. “Classic Davidson.” 

 

Amy nodded, and the two girls painted in silence for a few minutes.

 

“So, you and Hope?” Annabelle asked, raising an eyebrow. “I saw you drove her to school last week.” 

 

“Well, I just had to get my shoes back from her, and you know. It’s the polite thing to do.”

 

“Dude, come on. You guys were all over each other for weeks, and then after Homecoming it just stopped. What happened?”

 

Amy sighed, and bit her lip as she contemplated telling Annabelle the truth. “Okay, you can’t tell anyone this,” She started. 

 

“Hey, I may be a bitch, but you know how I feel about rumors,” Annabelle said. Amy nodded and lowered her voice as she told Annabelle about Homecoming night. 

 

“Wait, you’re telling me that Hope  _ didn’t  _ freak out?” She asked skeptically after Amy finished her story.

 

“Yeah, she was literally the calm one in this scenario.” 

 

“Antsler...Hope  _ likes  _ you, dude.”

 

“I’m not really sure about that anymore–”

 

“No, not just likes you as in wants to fuck you, but she  _ likes  _ you.” Annabelle set down her paintbrush and placed her hands on Amy’s shoulders, like she was going to shake the girl if she didn’t listen. “Look, don’t freak out or anything, but we used to f–”

 

“Yeah,” Amy quickly interjected. “Yeah, she told me about it.” 

 

“Okay, well, one time, we were at a party at Tanner’s house. Neither of us were out yet so we were always super discreet in getting a room. So we were fully into it, and Theo decides that it’s a good idea to stick his mouth against the crack of every bedroom door and hiccup super loud. He gets to the door of our room and does it, but the way it echoed, it sounded like someone was in the room with us. I tucked and rolled off the bed like I was being shot at, and she didn’t talk to me for two weeks after that happened.”

 

“What does this have to do with my situation?”

 

“She obviously still likes you or she would be ignoring you, dingus.”

 

Amy was beginning to get flustered. “Well–I, you know–” she stuttered as she spoke. 

 

“You just need to get out of your own head, Anstler.”

 

//

 

By the time late November rolled around, Molly barely even said hi to Amy in the hallways anymore. Somewhere along the line of what she deemed a natural separation from the girl, she became more infatuated with Jared than anyone had expected, least of all Jared. And since Jared was already obsessed with Molly, it became a mutually symbiotic relationship. 

 

Molly noticed that Amy had been spending a weird amount of time with the Drama kids, even sitting with them at lunch, which Molly figured was a direct effort to make her jealous or angry. Even weirder than the Drama kids was that she had seen Amy studying in the library after school with Annabelle. She figured that it wasn’t a genuine effort to make new friends, and that Amy was just trying to piss her off. She noticed that Amy and Hope had started talking again but not nearly as much as they did before Homecoming. The more Molly observed Amy’s way of dealing with the death of their friendship, the more she seemed to cling to Jared. 

 

//

 

Amy was spending her Thanksgiving break attempting to be thankful for all of the privileges she was afforded, but Molly kept lingering in the back of her mind, even as she spent most of the time with her parents. Though she had made friends with a lot of the Drama kids, they were only really school friends. And though she had gotten closer to Annabelle, they definitely weren’t at the sleepover stage. And Hope was aloof and warm and friendly and judgemental all at the same time, and Amy was still building the courage to make another move. 

 

To make things worse, everyone was gearing up for the holiday season, but she felt like it wouldn’t be the same this year. Molly wouldn’t invite her to help light the menorah for Hanukkah this year – one of the only times of the year that the girl’s mom makes an effort to spend time with her daughter. Amy wouldn’t invite Molly over for Christmas dinner. They wouldn’t sneak anything from Molly’s mom’s liquor cabinet for New Years. Amy would probably stay home and watch a documentary while Molly went out with Jared and her new friends. Amy was also getting anxious to hear back from the colleges she applied to. December was the month she would know for sure where she would be spending the next four years. She thought of how badly Molly wanted to get into Yale, and how she probably wouldn’t find out where the girl got accepted due to Principal Brown’s policy. 

 

On Black Friday, while her parents were out shopping, Amy sat on her bed, studying for a Calculus quiz she had the following Monday. Without any warning, her bedroom door flew open, and Gigi walked inside. Amy nearly fell off the bed, and her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Gigi?” 

 

“Yup. It’s me. In the flesh,” Gigi replied. “Don’t look so surprised. You knew I was gonna show up eventually.”

 

Amy tilted her head, thinking about the girl’s statement. Gigi wasn’t wrong. It’s her brand to show up out of nowhere, so now it’s just expected that she’ll show up in an inappropriate situation. She couldn’t say that she was irritated by the girl’s presence either. She was actually happy to have Gigi’s company. “Wh-why are you here?”

 

“You needed me, didn’t you?” Gigi asked as she sat down on the bed next to the freckled girl.

 

Amy shrugged. “I mean...sure?” 

 

Gigi took Amy’s hands in her own and pulled them to the middle of her chest, closing her eyes. She hummed a small tune and opened her eyes. “I know what you need,” She said. “Come with me.”

 

//

 

“Gigi, who’s house is this?” Amy asked as she parked on the road in front of a glamorous house with modern-style architecture. She was sure that nobody who went to Crockett lived in this zip code. Gigi had dragged her out to the car and given Amy directions until she told her to stop in front of this house. 

 

Gigi gave Amy a devilish smile, and got out of the car, not waiting for Amy before cutting through the yard to the front door. Amy quickly got out of the car, running after Gigi. “Seriously, Gigi, do you know anybody that lives here?”

 

“I just had a feeling that this is what you need,” Gigi said, grabbing Amy’s hand as they entered the house. Almost everyone looked like they could easily be ten years older than the two girls, and the party was raging. A DJ was set up in the corner and people were jumping around and dancing everywhere. They had to squeeze their way into another room where people were sitting around, drinking, and chatting amongst themselves. Amy spotted lines of what could only be cocaine on one of the coffee tables.

 

“Oh, vitamins,” Gigi said as she took a step towards the people sitting on the couch in front of the cocaine. 

 

“No, Gigi, that’s not like your vitamins,” Amy said, grabbing the girl’s arm and ducking into the next room where a group of guys were playing darts and drinking, which Amy thought was probably not the smartest idea. “Do you know anybody here?” She asked. 

 

“No, do you?” Gigi asked, to which Amy raised her eyebrows and placed a hand on her forehead in frustration. “Who cares if we know anyone? We will by the end of the night.” Gigi gave the freckled girl a smile so genuine that Amy couldn’t be mad, and she let Gigi drag her outside where a few people were gathered around a fire pit, and even more people were swimming and sitting around the pool. 

 

“Oh, we’re going in the pool for sure,” Gigi said. 

 

“I didn’t bring a bathing suit,” Amy said as she followed Gigi to the pool, almost sprinting to keep up. 

 

“Why would you need a bathing suit?” She asked as she approached the edge of the pool. She raised her arms above her head and closed her eyes before dropping face first into the water, remaining in a dead man’s float for a few seconds before rolling over and yelling to Amy, “Get in, the water’s perfect!” 

 

Amy looked around at all of the other people that were in and around the pool, then she looked down at herself, feeling as though she stuck out like a sore thumb. She was still wearing her dinosaur pajama shorts and an oversized t-shirt that had a squirrel riding a bicycle on it. She barely had time to put her shoes on after Gigi showed up. She looked back up at all of the people and realized that they were not looking at her, and she slipped off her shoes and socks, pushing them to the side. She made a running start and cannonballed into the pool. As she was submerged, she opened her eyes and watched the headless bodies moving around her, limbs contorted at strange angles, hands reaching outward, sometimes grasping for the wall or another hand. The water muted the sounds of the party above, and she felt alone in a way that was almost cathartic for the first time. She broke through the surface, grinning and sputtering for air. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter was really something to write lol but thank you all for reading and let me know what you think!


	8. 42069

Amy didn’t know what time it was when she woke up, but it was still dark, and she was lying on her stomach in the grass next to the fire pit. Her hair was still damp and so were her clothes, and she was still a little drunk, so she couldn’t figure out why she had thought it was a good idea to sleep in the grass. It seemed like the party had died down, as nobody else was outside, and she couldn’t hear any music coming from the house. She pushed herself up and sighed as she pulled her legs up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them and shivering slightly. November weather, even in L.A., was not forgiving towards girls who decided to sleep outside after jumping into a pool. As she moved, a small, folded piece of paper fell seemingly from her hair onto the ground. She picked it up and read it: 

 

_Amy, try hooking up with me when you’re not drunk next time. ;) Had to leave because my spirit was called to a gathering of scene kids at the nearest graveyard (they might be able to rid me of the ghosts in my eggs). You insisted on sleeping in the grass. XOXO Gigi_

 

_P.S. I took your car but left this random guy’s phone for you to call someone. The passcode is 42069._

 

Amy looked up at the sky, just chuckling. Maybe she should have been angry at Gigi for leaving her alone in a situation like this, but she didn’t hold it against the girl. If Gigi thought something bad would happen to her, then she wouldn’t have done it. “God, Gigi only you would write out a winky face sideways on a piece of paper,” She mumbled to herself, crumpling up the piece of paper and throwing it to the side before searching the immediate area for a cell phone. When she found it, she sighed and said “Fuck, an Android? Seriously, Gigi?” She unlocked the phone and noticed that it was three in the morning. “Okay, someone might be awake.” She logged into instagram after looking through and judging a few of the posts on the account that was already logged in. She DMed Annabelle’s finsta because she knew that the girl almost never posted on her main account.

 

 **AMYANSTLER:** _Okay, I wouldn’t be asking if it wasn’t urgent, but can you give me Hope’s number? I’m stranded and I’m going to try something…_

 

 **TRIPLE_AYE:** _Spiraling, Anstler?_

 

 **AMYANSTLER:** _I’ll explain later. Just...the number, please?_

 

 **TRIPLE_AYE:** _You better. It’s 310-9053_

 

 **AMYANSTLER:** _Thank you thank you you’re amazing thank y ou_

 

Amy couldn’t type Hope’s number quick enough. She held the phone to her ear and listened to the drone of the ring, muttering “Pick up, pick up, _please_ pick up.” 

 

She heard a click and the static of a quiet room on the other line, then she heard Hope clear her throat and say, “Hello?” in the grumpiest sleep voice Amy had ever heard that made her almost stop breathing entirely. 

 

“Hope, uh, it’s Amy. Look, I know it’s not a good time, but I could really use your help here.”

 

“What do you need?” Hope asked, sounding a little more alert than before.

 

“Uh, I’m at a party where I know absolutely no one. I have almost no recollection of the last four hours, and I’m still a little drunk. I know it’s three in the morning, and I just woke you up but...could you come pick me up?”

 

Hope chuckled. “Oh my god, Anstler, you’re like a bad coming of age movie.”

 

“To be fair, it’s Gigi’s fault,” Amy said, smiling to herself.

 

“Of course it is,” Hope said. “Where are you?”

 

Amy paused. “Actually, I don’t really know,” She said, getting up and walking through the yard, around the massive house. Eventually, she found a street number on the mailbox. “Okay, the street number is 2117. I don’t know the street name though.”

 

“Can you send me your location?”

 

“I have no idea. Gigi left me a fucking Android.”

 

Hope laughed. “Tonight’s really not your night, huh?”

 

Amy smirked. “I don’t know. Maybe it is my night. I’m pretty sure I had fun.”

 

“Do Androids have a maps app?”

 

“Uh,” Amy said. “I don’t know. Maybe.” She looked through the phone with a little bit of difficulty but found Google Maps. “Oh, okay, so I’m at 2117 Arcadia Lane.”

 

“Alright,” Hope said. “Just give me a few minutes to fully wake up and get myself somewhat presentable.”

 

“Ah, that’s not really necessary,” Amy said. “I’m not in the least bit presentable. At all. In any capacity.”

 

“Shut up, I’m gonna get there and you’re gonna have like a single strand of hair out of place, and then you’re gonna be like, ‘Oh my god, don’t even look at me.’” 

 

Amy laughed as she walked over to the front porch and sat down on the concrete steps. “Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that I’m kind of wet.” 

 

Hope went silent for a moment before she quietly said, “What?”

 

Amy closed her eyes and facepalmed. “I mean, like my body – no, like I jumped into a pool and got soaked, and now I’m still kind of damp. What I’m trying to say is that my clothes are wet.”

 

“Do you want me to bring you something dry?” 

 

“Oh, I didn’t even think about that. Yes, that’d be great.” 

 

Hope chuckled. “Okay, nerd. I’ll see you soon.”

 

“Mhm,” Amy hummed. “See you soon.”

 

They hung up, and Amy waited on the front steps for about half an hour before she saw Hope’s car coming down the road. She stood up, brushed herself off and ran up to the street, opening the passenger door and climbing in. 

 

“Hey,” Amy said, smiling at the girl. 

 

“Casual entrance for asking me to come pick you up at four o’clock in the morning,” Hope said, smirking at the girl. 

 

“Hey, it’s not technically four yet,” Amy said. “And thank you for coming.”

 

“Sure,” Hope said, picking up a plastic grocery bag off the floor and throwing it into Amy’s lap. “Here are some clothes to cure your...dampness.”

 

“Thanks.” Amy laughed and wasted no time pulling her squirrell t-shirt off, leaving her in a blue bralette. Hope didn’t want to look like she was staring or anything, so she started driving again. 

 

“That’s quite a party outfit,” Hope noted as she watched Amy pull her dinosaur shorts off, throwing them on the car floor with the t-shirt. She raised her eyebrows and looked away after noticing that the girl’s panties were sheer. 

 

“Yeah, Gigi showed up in my room last night at ten o’clock and gave me no time to prepare,” Amy said as she reached into the bag, pulling out a dry white crop top and grey sweatshorts. 

 

“Kinda like you calling me at three in the morning and asking me to pick you up from a mysterious mansion in Malibu?” Hope asked. 

 

Amy looked Hope up and down. The girl had her hair in a braid and wore a grey sweatshirt and black athletic shorts. “Well, you sleep in normal clothes, so it’s different,” She said as she leaned over and pushed the right sleeve of Hope’s sweatshirt up. “Can I borrow a hair tie?” She asked. Hope nodded and took her hand off the steering wheel so the girl could pull one of several hair ties off her wrist. 

 

Hope glanced over at Amy, who pulled the new shirt on and put her hair up into a bun. “So you don’t remember anything?” She asked.

 

Amy shook her head as she pulled the shorts on. “I remember I jumped into the pool, and then Gigi dared me to do four shots of tequila in a row before we did karaoke. The note Gigi left me said that I tried to hook up with her, but I’m not sure if that’s true or just wishful thinking on her part.”

 

Hope chuckled. “I’m gonna guess it’s wishful thinking.”

 

Amy smirked. “That could be wishful thinking on _your_ part.”

 

Hope scoffed. “You’d sleep with Gigi?”

 

Amy shrugged. “I mean, apparently I’ve done it tons of times before,” She said. “Why? Are you jealous?” She wiggled her eyebrows at the girl. 

 

Hope laughed. “No, just concerned for Gigi’s asshole.”

 

Amy gasped and hit Hope gently on the shoulder. “You can’t say that,” She said, her cheeks already turning red.

 

“Says who?” Hope asked. “I always make fun of you.”

 

Amy rolled her eyes as she sat back in her seat. “Wanna go to Waffle House?” 

 

//

 

After a quick pit stop at Waffle House, they finally made it back to Amy’s house. Hope parked in the driveway. Amy sighed as she looked over at the girl, biting her bottom lip. Hope raised her eyebrows expectantly.  “This is your stop.”

 

“Do you want to come inside?” Amy asked. “It’s a long ride home for you.”

 

Hope smiled. “Yeah, a whole ten minutes.” 

 

“I just don’t want you driving sleep deprived when you don’t have me bugging you.”

 

Hope just looked at Amy who was looking at her with her big puppy dog eyes, and she sighed. “Okay, sure, I’ll come inside.”

 

The two girls got out of the car and carefully snuck into the house and up to Amy’s room without disturbing her parents. Hope stood in the middle of the room and looked around as Amy cleared the Calculus textbook and notebook from her top bunk. “Well...haven’t been here in a while,” She said.

 

Amy sat on her knees in the middle of the top bunk, looking down at Hope, after she was finished clearing off her bed. She cocked her head slightly to the side. “Hope, you’re being a dork.” 

 

Hope’s jaw dropped slightly. “That’s rich coming from Queen Dork herself.”

 

“That makes me the authority on dorkiness, then, right?” She said, motioning for Hope to join her on the top bunk. 

 

Hope rolled her eyes and climbed up easily in two movements. “No, _I’m_ the authority on dorkiness. If you were the authority, then dorks wouldn’t be oppressed.”

 

“Isn’t that a little fucked up, though?” Amy asked, falling back against her pillows and stretching her legs out. 

 

“Sometimes dorks need to be oppressed.” Hope sat with her legs crossed on the opposite side of the bed. She giggled as Amy’s legs stretched into her territory, one of the girl’s feet nudging her playfully in the stomach. 

 

“I don’t know about that,” Amy said. “But if I’m Queen Dork and you’re the authority on dorkiness, then does that mean that I’m into my oppressor?”

 

Hope smirked. “Well, if you’re a pillow princess, and I’m a girl looking for her nut, then does that mean that _I’m_ into _my_ oppressor?” She replied. 

 

Amy’s jaw dropped and she propped herself up onto her elbows. “If I was a pillow princess, my finger would not have been anywhere near your butthole, just saying,” She said defensively. 

 

Hope chuckled and shrugged. “Doesn’t matter anymore.”

 

Amy furrowed her eyebrows. “Why not?”

 

Hope climbed over to the other side of the bed, collapsing on her back next to Amy. “Just doesn’t,” She murmured, closing her eyes. 

 

Amy rolled over onto her side, looking down at Hope. “But why?” She nudged the girl in the stomach. 

 

Hope opened her eyes, laughing as she pushed Amy’s hand away from her stomach. “You’re too awake right now,” She said. 

 

Amy intertwined their fingers as their hands came into contact and shrugged. “You’re avoiding the question.”

 

Hope sighed. “It doesn’t matter anymore because I don’t care. All of the freaking out over it was stupid in the first place, and I don’t just mean your freak out because my freak out was stupid too.”

 

“Well, I’m glad we’re finally on the same page,” Amy said, chuckling. “But watching you brood over this for, like, a month was kind of hot,” She joked.

 

Hope laughed. “Shut up, I was conflicted.”

 

“Trust me, I know,” Amy said. “Remember that day you said you liked my bolo tie in first period and then after lunch you said it looked like I pulled a worm out of the ground and wrapped it around my neck?” 

 

Hope snorted. “Still funny.”

 

“Yeah, but you have nothing on my middle school bullies,” Amy said, laughing.

 

“Oh yeah, I remember Amber Downs used to _hate_ you.”

 

Amy nodded. “I mean, bullying is bad, and a lot of the shit her and her friends said to me was terrible, but I had a huge crush on Amber at the time, so when she would run into me on purpose and slam me into the lockers...it was a little exhilarating.” 

 

“Oh my god,” Hope said, laughing. “So Molly threatening to shave Amber’s head in her sleep if she kept picking on you really wasn’t to your benefit at all?”

 

Amy giggled. “It definitely was, but I’m not gonna lie...I kinda missed her for a while after it stopped.”

 

“There’s so much in that statement that we don’t have time to unpack.” 

 

“Don’t worry, I’ve talked to my therapist about it already,” Amy said, chuckling. 

 

“So, do you only like me because I’m mean?” She asked, quirking an eyebrow.

 

“No, you’re also really hot.”

 

“Shallow.”

 

“Maybe, but you’re definitely fishing for praise,” Amy said. 

 

“Well, it didn’t work anyway. Anyone would tell me I’m hot.”

 

Amy chuckled. “Mhm,” She hummed. “Well, you’re secretly nice. I like that about you. And you’re probably the coolest person I’ve ever met. So that’s a factor too.”

 

“Now we’re getting somewhere,” Hope said, smirking at the girl.

 

“But now you have to say what you like about me,” Amy said, smiling as she dropped back against the pillows again, staring up at the ceiling. 

 

“Uh, isn’t it pretty obvious at this point?” Hope asked.

 

“Hope, I don’t know if you’ve ever been obvious about anything in your life.”

 

Hope chuckled. “Well, you can take a joke. You’re smart, obviously.” Hope thought for a moment. “Somehow, even after being Davidson’s friend for ten years, you have a nuanced understanding of people and the world. Most dickheads our age, including myself a lot of the time, don’t get that at all.”

 

Amy placed her free hand on her stomach and listening to Hope, taking a few deep breaths as she smiled to herself. It wasn’t often that anyone noticed her enough to compliment her this way. 

 

“You alive?” Hope asked after a few moments of silence.

 

“Yeah...just don’t have anything else to say,” Amy replied, and Hope just laughed.

 

“So you’re just gonna lie there, nerd?”

 

Amy raised her eyebrows and propped herself up on her elbows again, looking over at Hope. “Any suggestions for what I should be doing?”

 

“I mean…” She trailed off, propping herself up onto her elbows as well and turning to face the girl. 

 

Amy turned onto her side and tilted her head slightly as she looked at Hope. The sun had begun to rise, and the pinkish rays of light filled the room like they were submerged in lemonade. She placed a hand on Hope’s cheek as she leaned in to kiss the girl. 

 

Hope’s hands found their place on Amy’s cheeks as they kissed, and she couldn’t stop herself from going in for another one as soon as the shorter girl ended the first one. It had been over a month, and it was as refreshing as the first time. Amy’s lips were as soft as she remembered them to be.

 

“I forgot how that felt,” Amy said as they pulled away for another second.

 

“I know.” Hope nodded and pulled the girl in once again, kissing her softly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So two chapters in two(ish) days, can you believe?? Thanks to everyone who has been reading/commenting/leaving kudos. I appreciate the support so much y'all. Let me know what you think about this one :) Constructive criticisms/suggestions/questions are always welcome here!


	9. Submitted

Thanksgiving break passed, and everyone was reluctantly back to school. The students and faculty of Crockett High had gotten a small taste of the holiday season and most had already entered break-mode even while the stress of finals still loomed overhead. Any day now, the seniors who applied early decision, which was of most of the senior class, would be hearing back from colleges. Hope was, as usual, an exception to Crockett’s stringent attitude and expectations. She figured that she could get away with applying regular decision because of her grades and test scores, which bought her a little more time to figure it all out. So, while most of her classmates would soon be done with the stress that comes with college applications and waiting for acceptance and rejection letters, Hope was just getting started. 

 

“I need to finish my NYU application this week,” Hope grumbled over a bag of potato chips. She and Amy had decided to stay inside for lunch, having scoped out an empty computer lab. “I just need to get it over with.”

 

“When do you have to send it in?” Amy asked. They were sitting in the typical wheeled office chairs, and Amy was having a little too much fun as she propelled herself from wall to wall. 

 

“First of the year,” Hope said.

 

“So you have almost a month,” Amy said. “Same deadline for Barnard and Vassar?”

 

She nodded. “Yeah, but I’m pretty much finished with those two. I just have a lot to do for NYU.”

 

Amy nodded as she pulled her feet up, placing them on the wall, and launched herself across the room. She was secretly pleased when she learned that NYU was Hope’s first choice, as they would be living in the same city together, just a train ride or an uber away. Of course, she was a little bit more excited when she learned that Barnard was the girl’s second choice because it was literally across the street from Columbia. Wherever they went, they would still be within driving distance of each other, which Amy thought was a happy coincidence. “Busy few weeks ahead then?” She asked.

 

Hope just sighed. “Yup.”

 

“Want an M&M to make you feel better?” Amy asked as she managed to scoot over to the table and grab a packet of M&Ms out of her lunch bag. 

 

Hope laughed. “Sure,” She said, opening her mouth as Amy tossed one in the air. For a girl literally named Amy, she kind of had terrible aim, and Hope had to lean to the left in order to catch it in her mouth. “Thanks, babe.”

 

Amy rolled over to Hope as she popped a few M&Ms into her own mouth. “You don’t need to stress out over this,” Amy said. “Your grades and test scores are significantly higher than the average for all of those schools. You have solid recommendations. I haven’t seen your portfolio yet, but I know it’s great.” Amy took both of Hope’s hands in her own, giving the taller girl a smile. 

 

Hope squeezed Amy’s hands and let her own hands find their way up the girl’s arms, stopping at her shoulders. Amy shuddered slightly and laughed before Hope leaned in to kiss her. It wasn’t their first kiss of the day, not by a long shot. The first kiss of the day had lasted longer than the others, as they had the luxury of privacy in Hope’s car (because Gigi  _ still _ hadn’t returned Amy’s car). The subsequent kisses happened while no one else was looking: behind Hope’s locker door, in the empty hallways when they both just happened to be going to the bathroom at the same time, behind the rows of books when Miss Ramos sent the class to the library – essentially anywhere they could get away with it. And in this empty computer lab, they could  _ definitely  _ get away with it. 

 

//

 

“So, you and Hope are back on?” Annabelle asked, smirking as she dropped her backpack onto the stage and sat down next to Amy, who was painting details onto vase. “What did you do?”

 

“Oh, you know. Just asked her to pick me up from a party in Malibu at three in the morning,” Amy said, grinning at the girl.

 

“Jesus, Anstler,” Annabelle exclaimed, shaking her head. “And then what?” She wiggled her eyebrows at Amy, a smirk playing on her lips.

 

“We went to Waffle House,” Amy said.

 

“Oh.” Annabelle’s smirk turned to a disappointed frown. “Lame.” 

 

“And then she came back to my house,” Amy said.

 

Annabelle’s inquisitive expression returned. “And?”

 

“And we fell asleep,” Amy replied, chuckling at the way Annabelle’s face fell again. “In the same bed,” She added, making Annabelle perk up once again.

 

“That’s actually kinda sweet,” Annabelle said. “So, why isn’t the Big Friendly Giant here helping us out?” 

 

“She’s seriously not that tall,” Amy defended, a small smile appearing on her face at Annabelle’s joke. “But she’s working on college stuff. Plus, I doubt she would come within ten feet of the auditorium.” 

 

“Well, she’s gonna have to next semester,” Annabelle said. 

 

Amy’s eyebrows furrowed. “Why?”

 

“To come see you perform. Alan heard you singing the other day, and he wants to cast you in the Wizard of Oz next semester,” Annabelle said. Amy raised her eyebrows. Annabelle just smirked. “George is pissed because he thinks you’re gonna steal Dorothy from him,” She said. “But I think you should audition for the Wicked Witch of the West.”

 

Amy laughed. “I mean, I actually have a great witch cackle, so maybe.” She watched Annabelle as the girl pulled her laptop out of her backpack. “You’d make a good Dorothy,” Amy noted. “But don’t tell George I said that.”

 

Annabelle gave Amy a rare genuine smile as she opened her laptop. “Really?” 

 

Amy nodded. “Yeah, I could totally see it.” 

 

//

 

“Finished.” Hope shut her laptop and threw it across the bed as she very dramatically rolled off her bed and onto the floor. She had been working on making the application flawless for the past three days, and could barely think of anything else during that time. But even after she hit the “submit” button on the application, she still felt that sense of dread in her stomach. 

 

Amy looked up from her homework and watched the girl sprawl her limbs out on the carpet. She moved her textbook from her lap and lowered herself from the chair onto the ground. She sighed as she slung one arm around Hope’s waist and nuzzled her head into the crook of the girl’s neck. “How do you feel?” She asked.

 

“Kinda nervous,” Hope replied, staring up at the ceiling of her bedroom. 

 

Amy squeezed Hope’s waist as she gave the girl a few neck kisses. “Don’t be,” She murmured. “NYU admissions officers are gonna lose their shit over you.” 

 

Hope chuckled. “Hey, you wanna see something?” She asked.

 

Amy nodded and sat up, watching as Hope got up and walked over to her closet. The taller girl pulled a box off the top shelf and set it on the ground, rummaging through it. She pulled out a few photographs and spread them out on the floor, motioning for Amy to come over and look. “In addition to my camera, I managed to salvage most of the pictures from the protest,” She said as Amy came up behind her, resting her chin on Hope’s shoulder and wrapping her arms around the taller girl’s waist from behind. “Some have a little bit of water damage, but I think it kind of adds character to them.” 

 

The first photo was one of Amy on the bus, Hope’s hand on her shoulder and a half smile on her face as she looked into the camera’s lens with a mixture of intensity and anxiety in her eyes. Next to that picture was one of Gigi with her arms outstretched in the middle of the crowd. The edges of the picture were damaged, distorting the faces and bodies of the people surrounding the girl. The rest of the pictures were of random protesters and a few candids of Amy. Some of them were water-damaged while some looked completely untouched. “I love these,” Amy said, tilting her head to the side so that she was looking at Hope. “I should have taken a picture of you.”

 

Hope chuckled. “That’s okay. I’m not into getting my picture taken.”

 

“I’m into having pictures of you looking impossibly cool, though,” Amy said, giving the girl a peck on the cheek. 

 

“Why? What are you gonna do with them?” Hope asked, turning her head to look at the girl with a smirk. 

 

“Well,” Amy began. “I’d have to put one on my desk, obviously. Maybe one in my locker.”

 

Hope smiled and rolled her eyes, twisting her body around to face Amy. “Not what I meant, dork.”

 

“Isn’t masturbating to a physical photo of someone, like, very twentieth century?” Amy asked.

 

“I don’t trust my FBI agent with my nudes,” Hope said, shrugging. 

 

“Fair enough,” Amy said with a chuckle. She picked up a photo of herself, examining it once again. It was the one Hope had taken on the bus before the protest. “What made you suddenly start talking to me this year?” She asked, tilting her head to the side as she looked back up at Hope. She was genuinely curious because she remembered she was completely shocked when Hope approached her in the library and asked about the protest. Before that, during the first few weeks of school, she remembered being pleasantly surprised when Hope would put her book down to engage in a simple class-related conversation with her. 

 

Hope just chuckled. “Is it bad to say that it was kind of a social experiment?” When Amy’s jaw dropped, Hope put her hand on the girl’s chin, closing the girl’s mouth for her. “Not like a Cole Sprouse tumblr social experiment, dork.” 

 

Amy’s eyebrows furrowed. “Then what kind?”

 

“Well,” Hope started. “It’s a long story.”

 

//

 

_ Two Weeks Before The Beginning of Senior Year _

 

_ Hope had decided to come to Nick’s house, even though she knew Annabelle was going to be there. Over the past six months, she had strategically chosen to go to parties she knew she wouldn’t see Annabelle at. Unfortunately for Hope, the other girl was a regular at Nick’s weekly parties, and nobody else she knew threw ragers like Nick, so she hadn’t been to a party all summer. When Tanner texted her about the end of the summer bash at Nick’s house, Hope figured she had to go because she wasn’t going to be the girl who didn’t show up to any parties all summer, and she also figured she shouldn’t be hiding from Annabelle. If anything, she thought Annabelle should have been hiding from her.  _

 

_ Of course, Hope showed up about two hours into the action – an hour before the peak of the party. She never liked showing up to parties on time, when everyone was sober, because it was full of awkward small talk with people she really didn’t like too much to begin with. She tolerated Tanner, Theo, and Nick because they were actually pretty cool guys even if she didn’t have much in common with any of them. Hope and Tanner often teamed up for beer pong because they were the best players and could crush anyone who challenged them. She couldn’t count the number of times Theo had pulled her onto the porch to smoke and just talk about random shit. And Nick was pretty much just a pretty-boy dumbass who just wanted everyone at his party to have a good time, which Hope appreciated. But talking to the other people they had invited was a little too much interaction for Hope. She preferred to show up when nobody was paying attention.  _

 

_ She made it to the kitchen and took one shot of vodka before Tanner walked in and picked her up, engulfing her in a hug that wasn’t necessarily welcome, but Hope hadn’t seen him all summer, so she figured she wouldn’t call him out on it. “Dude! We missed you,” He said, slurring his words as he set her back on the ground. “Where the hell have you been all summer?” _

 

_ Hope just laughed and shrugged. “I’ve been busy. You know, picking up extra shifts at Mike’s. And I have to read a certain number of pages everyday or else I’ll spontaneously combust.” _

 

_ “Well, I’m glad you found time to have one last hurrah before senior year starts,” Tanner replied. “We already played beer pong, but I can make you a drink if you want.”  _

 

_ Hope shook her head as she poured another shot. “Just shots for me tonight.” _

 

_ “Okay,” Tanner said, moving toward the kitchen entryway as Hope took her second shot. “Let me know how many you end up doing. I still reign supreme.” _

 

_ “Oh yeah, that night at Theo’s uncle’s apartment,” Hope said, recalling the memory from the year before as she spoke. “How many did you do that night?” _

 

_ “Fourteen,” Tanner said with a shit-eating grin on his face.  _

 

_ “How are you not dead?” Hope asked, pouring a third shot and downing it. Tanner just shrugged and left Hope in the kitchen, slurring something about immortality and being the Shot King. Nervous about the possibility or maybe inevitability of running into Annabelle, Hope took a fourth shot, and went to go find Theo.  _

 

_ She maneuvered through bodies in the hallway and looked out onto the porch. Nobody was outside, which was surprising considering it was the middle of summer, and Nick had a perfectly functional pool. Even though she had planned on smoking with Theo, she couldn’t give up the opportunity to be that brooding asshole that sits outside by the pool, getting high and reading a book while everyone else was inside. So, she walked across the backyard and sat down on the stone bench behind the pool, pulling her book out of the pocket of her jacket and setting it down next to her –  _ In Cold Blood  _ by Truman Capote. It was classic Hope: pretentious but interesting enough to read without wanting to blow her brains out. She pulled a joint out of the same pocket and placed it between her lips, opening up to the place she had left off. She lit the jay and inhaled deeply. It didn’t take long to immerse herself in the book. From the fact that she had smoked the joint down almost to a roach, she estimated that she had been out there for almost an hour when she heard a familiar voice say, “Hey.”  _

 

_ Hope looked up from her book, dog-earing the page as she saw Annabelle standing in front of her, arms crossed over her chest. She set the book down in her lap and put out the joint. “Careful. Someone might see you out here and think you’re a dyke like me,” She said coldly.  _

 

_ Annabelle rolled her eyes and slipped her sandals off, turning away from Hope as she sat down at the edge of the pool, dipping her feet in. “I came out here to apologize for all that shit,” She said.  _

 

_ Hope scoffed, sliding the book back into her jacket pocket. “Some apology.” She got up and walked around the pool, back up the porch.  _

 

_ “Wait,” Annabelle said. “Just sit over here with me for a second.”  _

 

_ “Why?” Hope asked. “Are you just gonna make excuses for what you said because you were closeted? Because if that’s the case, I think we can save a lot of time here, and I can just fucking go.”  _

 

_ Annabelle sighed. “No. I’m trying to figure out a way to apologize that doesn’t make me seem inauthentic.”  _

 

_ Hope turned completely to face the other girl and held her arms out before letting them fall back to her sides. “Then figure it out.” _

 

_ Annabelle bit her lip and kicked at the water a bit before she spoke. “I’m really sorry about what I said, and I wish I hadn’t. I was scared, and that’s not an excuse, but at least it’s an explanation. You know, almost everything that happened between us was toxic as fuck, but I think it’d be a whole lot better if we were friends for the rest of high school instead of just avoiding each other this way.”  _

 

_ Hope’s eyebrows furrowed as she listened to the girl speak. “Why do you even want to be friends with me?” She asked. _

 

_ It was Annabelle’s turn to scoff. “As much as you like to pretend you’re not part of the group, you kind of are. And I’m trying not to be shitty to other people anymore. Aren’t you tired of it by now, Hope?” _

 

_ “Tired of what?” _

 

_ “Tired of being tired of people?” _

 

_ Hope cocked her head to the side. _

 

_ “I mean, I don’t want to be remembered as the mega-bitch by everyone except a couple of people,” Annabelle continued.  _

 

_ “You care too much about what people think,” Hope said dismissively.  _

 

_ Annabelle shook her head. “That’s the thing, though. I really don’t. I just want to be nicer and give people the benefit of the doubt. I don’t want to be like the people that call me Triple A behind my back.”  _

 

_ Hope just raised her eyebrows and crossed her arms over her chest.  _

 

_ Annabelle sighed, just staring at Hope. “We’re so similar, Hope. We write people off without making an effort to understand them. I think you’re a little more extreme than I am, but I know you’re not really mean like everyone thinks you are. Tanner, Theo, Nick, and hell, even Ryan – they all know you’re a good person at heart. You don’t show other people that side of yourself. Are you gonna go through the rest of high school just hiding yourself from people?”  _

 

_ Hope loosened up and rubbed her temples as she walked back around the pool, crouching down and sitting next to Annabelle with her legs crossed. “What’s the point? It’s easier to give them the mean girl persona because that’s what they expect.” _

 

_ “The point is subverting their expectations. Letting go of your negativity. Isn’t it better to prove people wrong by being kind than using coldness as a defense mechanism? Let people see you and judge you for who you really are. I mean, take Amy Anstler, for example.”  _

 

_ Hope’s eyebrows furrowed as she looked at Annabelle. “The fuck does Amy Anstler have to do with any of this?” _

 

_ “Oh my god, if you deny that you’ve been pining over her since like freshman year, I’m going to push you into this fucking pool.” _

 

_ Hope rolled her eyes. “Pining is definitely an overstatement.” Sure, Hope thought that Amy was cute, but she was way too much of a nerd for Hope to actually be interested in her. She was just nice to look at when Hope didn’t feel like paying attention in class.  _

 

_ “You like her, and yet, on the rare occasion that you interact with her, you’re almost always making fun of her,” Annabelle said. “And she’s probably the one person who doesn’t even expect you to be a bad person just because you look like a mean girl. She probably doesn’t even think you’re a bad person even though all you do is gently bully her.”  _

 

_ Hope chuckled at the phrase “gently bully” and shrugged. “So? What are you trying to say?” _

 

_ “That’s a missed opportunity, Hope. We both have missed out because we assume that other people are making assumptions about us.” _

 

_ Hope thought for a moment. “I don’t feel like I’ve missed out.” _

 

_ Annabelle raised her eyebrows, as if to say that she knew Hope was lying, but she decided not to say it out loud. “Just think about what I’m saying. We’re getting too old for our personalities to be based on thinking that the world is out to get us.” _

 

//

 

“I thought about what Annabelle had said for the rest of the summer. We talked about it a few more times, and I decided that it wouldn’t be a terrible idea,” Hope said. “And I kept thinking about you, and I felt bad for the way I had been treating you. Once we started actually having conversations in class, I kinda realized that I liked you more than I thought I would, and...here we are.”

 

Amy was blushing and grinning at the girl. “I can’t believe you’ve liked me since freshman year, and only recently decided to act on it.”

 

“To be fair, you were very obviously into Ryan. I mean, it was pretty bad last year when you were going up to talk to her at lunch almost everyday.” 

 

Amy cringed at the thought. “Don’t remind me,” She said. “I didn’t realize she had been hooking up with Nick in the gender neutral bathroom after school the entire time.”

 

Hope chuckled. “I thought it was common knowledge.” 

 

“Well, thanks for giving me a heads up,” Amy teased before letting out a long sigh. “I actually walked in while it was happening. That’s how I found out.” 

 

Hope stifled a laugh. “Babe, that’s so sad.” 

 

“I know!” Amy exclaimed. “I mean, it’s kind of funny now, but at the time it was so devastating that Ryan wasn’t even a lesbian.” 

 

Hope nodded. “You’d think she’d at least be bi, but she’s straight as a board, huh?” 

 

Amy chuckled and nodded. “But let’s get back to this you liking me since freshman year business,” She said, wiggling her eyebrows as she moved closer to Hope. 

 

“What about it?” Hope asked, raising her eyebrows.

 

“Uh, why didn’t you tell me?” Amy asked, throwing her arms around the girl and giggling as they fell back onto the floor. 

 

“Jesus,” Hope mumbled as her back hit the carpet, rolling her eyes at the girl’s question. “Neither of us were out. I was a misanthrope. Any other questions?”

 

Amy pecked the girl’s lips. “Well, I came out sophomore year, and you came out last year, so what’s your excuse for that?” She asked as she pulled herself up onto her elbows, hovering over the girl.

 

“Still a misanthrope,” Hope replied. “And it wasn’t like I had a crush on you. I just thought you were cute.” 

 

“Isn’t that what a crush is?”

 

“No, a crush is also liking someone’s personality, and I thought you were kind of annoying,” Hope replied.

 

Amy’s jaw dropped as she looked down at Hope. “You thought I was annoying?”

 

Hope chuckled at the girl’s reaction. “Well, I thought Molly was more annoying than you, but the two of you always seemed to be so obnoxious. I think I fixated on you because I kind of wanted your attention, and that’s why I would make jabs at you every now and then.” 

 

“Well, I’m glad we’ve both grown,” Amy said. “And neither of us have to deal with Molly anymore.” 

Hope furrowed her eyebrows as she watched the girl talk about Molly. There was obviously still pain behind the statement, but she didn’t think Amy would want to hear what she had to say about the whole situation. At least, not yet. Instead, she just leaned in to kiss the girl.

//

 

“Annabelle’s throwing a New Years Eve party at her dad’s apartment,” Jared said as he locked his phone and set it on the table. He was sitting in the library with Molly doing homework. “Should be nertz.” He laughed at his own turn of phrase.

 

Molly laughed and looked up at him. “I can’t believe these people just offer their own homes up to be partied in,” She said. “Like, why do you want a bunch of people in your house?”

 

Jared shrugged. “People who consistently throw parties usually have a mom or dad complex. They just wanna feel needed, you know?”

 

Molly raised an eyebrow skeptically and went back to her work. “Are we going?”

 

“I think it could be fun.”

 

Molly sighed. “So we are going?”

 

“Only if you want to.”

 

“I don’t like Triple A.”

 

“Molls,” Jared said, giving her a tired look. 

 

“Listen, she’s been rude to me for no reason since forever.”

 

“Yeah, but she helped you and Amy plan Hom–” Jared stopped speaking as soon as he saw the look on Molly’s face. She hated when he brought up Amy, but she had never fully explained their split to him aside from saying that they both needed space. “She helped you plan Homecoming,” He said. 

 

“And then she went back to being a bitch to me, so.” Molly shrugged. 

 

Jared sighed. “Molls, you don’t exactly help the situation.”

 

“Jared, are you my boyfriend or my mother?” Molly snapped. She was getting annoyed with this conversation. It seemed like more and more they were having these exchanges about her behavior, and she could feel Jared getting tired of her, but she couldn’t stop herself from saying the things she knew he didn’t want to hear.

 

“Jeez, Molls,” Jared said, going back to working on his homework. “Just think about it. It could be fun, and you won’t have to talk to Annabelle for more than a couple minutes.”

 

Molly bit her lip as she worked on her finals study guide. Jared was right, but between the stress of finals approaching, receiving news from colleges, and her strange social life recently, she was almost constantly looking to pick a fight. Recently, she was starting to second guess the relationship. Jared was sweet and generally a good guy, but once she had taken off her rose-colored glasses, she wasn’t super confident in the relationship. He might have been the right guy for Homecoming and for losing her virginity to, and he was a hell of a lot of fun those first few weeks, but Molly quickly came to realize that Jared required a lot of extra attention that she wasn’t necessarily willing to give him. She wasn’t the type of girl that liked to be smothered, and that’s how she was feeling. She felt guilty about not just ending it, but she didn’t feel like she could bring herself to do it. If she cut off Jared, then she cut off pretty much her entire social circle. Molly figured she really couldn’t blame anyone else for the situation she had put herself in. 

 

//

 

It was 6 o’clock in the afternoon, and Molly was sitting alone at her desk in her room, staring at the screen of her laptop. Her mouse hovered over the email for a moment before she clicked on it. She followed the directions and clicked the link, leading to a login page. She entered her username and password, and bit down on her lip as she brought the mouse to the login button. She half heartedly chewed on the fingernail of her index finger before clicking down on it. Her eyes frantically scanned the page, and she didn’t sit back in her chair until she read the word, “Congratulations!”

 

She slumped against the chair, relief washing over her body. This was the feeling of four long years of hard work paying off. Just relief. She was getting out of her mother’s tacky apartment after all. She was going to be at Yale this time next year. She was going to give everyone who ever doubted her that terrible feeling in the bottom of their stomachs. She was so relieved for everything to be over, and so excited and scared and assured about her future. 

 

She looked around her bedroom, at the various awards and trophies she’d garnered over the years, her ‘take no prisoners’ bannister, and the pictures of different female politicians scattered across the dressers. Her mom wouldn’t be home for another few hours, and she felt like a text was not the way to deliver this kind of life-altering news. She picked up her phone to call Jared but remembered that he was at an event with his parents, so she decided not to bother him. 

 

As she sat there in her quiet victory, she couldn’t help but think about how much she wished Amy was there with her. Amy would hug her and tell her how proud of her she was, and they would celebrate by going to get pancakes or dancing to no music or some other weird thing that was only theirs. Molly shut her laptop as she blinked the tears forming in her eyes away. It was rare for her to express sadness, even when she was alone, because to cry would be to show weakness, and Molly Davidson  _ wasn’t _ weak. But the tears came anyway because even though Molly had been shoving it down deep and not acknowledging it, she missed Amy. So this was the moment she was given in what was supposed to be the beginning of a new phase of her life. 

 

//

 

“Sweetie, guess what came in the mail today,” Charmaine said in a sing-song voice as she greeted Amy and Hope after school. 

 

“What?” Amy asked as the two girls meandered into the kitchen behind Charmaine. 

“It’s from Columbia,” Doug said, picking up a big envelope off the kitchen table. 

 

Amy froze. She had told her parents that she didn’t want to check online, and that she’d rather wait for the physical letter to arrive. But she didn’t think the letter would come just days after the online results were posted. “Oh, uh, great,” She said, taking the envelope from her dad. She looked over at Hope for reassurance. Hope just laughed and shook her head as if to say,  _ You’re still nervous after looking at that giant envelope, nerd?  _ Amy ripped into the envelope and pulled out the folder that was inside. She opened the folder, and in the first pocket was a letter. She scanned it, and searched until she found the words “Congratulations on your acceptance to Columbia University!” A grin spread across her face and she looked up at her parents and Hope. “I got in,” She said, as if she were surprised. 

 

Doug and Charmaine roped both Amy and Hope into a group hug and went on about how proud they were and how much they’re gonna miss her. The interaction ended in Doug turning away, almost in tears, exclaiming, “My baby’s all grown up!” while Charmaine rubbed his back and said, “It’s gonna be okay, honey.” 

 

Amy chuckled as she and Hope made their way to Amy’s room. “Sorry about that,” Amy said. 

 

Hope shook her head, sitting down on the bottom bunk. “It’s cool that your parents care so much,” She said. “And congrats, you’re officially an Ivy Leaguer.” Hope pulled off her jacket as she leaned back against a pillow. 

 

“This is so weird,” Amy said, collapsing on the bed next to Hope. “I’ve been, like, dreaming about this for my whole life, and... honestly, it kind of feels anti-climatic.” 

 

“I guess it’ll sink in once you actually leave.” Hope smiled. “But I wouldn’t know,” She added.

 

“You’ll know soon enough.”

 

“I kind of like that I won’t know until April,” Hope said. “But if I don’t get in, I have some money saved up. Enough to get me to New York, at least.”

 

Amy grinned. “Don’t worry. You’ll get in.” 

 

Hope nodded. She knew that going to NYU or to Barnard or even to Vassar, which was about an hour’s drive outside the city, would be the easiest way to get to New York. She knew that the schools would offer her scholarships, and she’d probably get enough financial aid for her to take out as minimal loans as possible, but she wasn’t super thrilled about continuing in the education system. Sure, she had always gotten good grades, but she didn’t believe that those grades or test scores really held much weight. She didn’t believe in benchmarks of intelligence, but there had always been a push for her to go to college by her mother, who understandably struggled because she  _ didn’t  _ go to college when she was given the opportunity. Hope’s counselors told her that they could set up interviews for spots at Ivy League schools, contact Crockett alumni to do these interviews, and essentially do everything they could to get her into the best college. And Amy was always so wrapped up in her excitement for Columbia that Hope didn’t want to bring her down by bringing any of this doubt she had about the future. She applied to three schools because that’s what everyone had told her to do, and she still wanted to have her options open. She was glad that she didn’t really have to worry about any of it for a few months. She was content to just enjoy the rest of her time in high school with Amy.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all, hope you enjoyed this chapter :) Let me know what you think!


	10. I Just Need To Fucking Pee

“Jared, I can’t fucking do this anymore,” Molly said, pacing around the tiny single stall bathroom. Jared shut the lid of the toilet and sat down. The girl had just grabbed his hand and pulled him to the bathroom after a brief conversation with his Aunt Debbie. They were on a yacht at the Christmas party Jared’s parents threw every year. 

 

Jared sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. Molly had been acting weird since the beginning of winter break. “Molls, what are you talking about? Aunt Debbie’s not that weird –”

 

“It’s not your Aunt Debbie,” Molly interrupted. “It’s – it’s us.” She motioned to herself and then to Jared several times and continued to pace, fighting off an anxiety attack. 

 

Jared furrowed his eyebrows. “What are you saying?”

 

Molly stopped mid-pace to look at the boy. She softened when she saw the confused expression on his face. “I mean, it’s not us. It’s me, okay? Jared, you’re a great guy –”

 

“Hold on, are you seriously giving me the ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ speech in a bathroom on Christmas day?” He asked, standing up. 

 

“No,” Molly said. “What I mean when I say that is that all of this is not me. Swanky parties and yachts and Aunt Debbies. It’s not me. I was brought up on Kraft mac and cheese because my mom couldn’t afford to buy us real food, and the apartment I live in is just slightly bigger than this bathroom, and I don’t personally know Elon Musk. Listen, you are genuinely a good person, Jared, but I can’t give you what you need. I think we both know that.”

 

Jared moved past Molly to the door. “You know what? Good luck at Yale, Molly. I’m sure you’ll find tons of people there who were brought up on Kraft mac and cheese.” With that, Jared opened the door and slipped outside to rejoin the rest of the party-goers. 

 

Molly almost followed him out. She wanted to explain herself, to tell him every thought that led to this decision, but she didn’t want to make the situation worse than it already was. She stared at herself in the mirror for a minute, muttering, “What the fuck are you doing, Molly?” to herself. 

 

When winter break had started, Molly finally got a break from Jared, and she found that it weirdly made her feel better. Being on her own was hard, but being with Jared was draining. After the first day of break, she had decided to break up with him. She figured she would do it after the holidays were over, but Aunt Debbie’s comment about the homosexual agenda during the filet mignon and lobster dinner had sent her spiralling. Not that she wasn’t already spiralling because she definitely had been for quite a while. She had lost her mind in recent months, all because of some insignificant conversation with Hope that made her feel insecure. Meanwhile, Hope and Amy were back together, and Molly was standing by herself in a bathroom on a boat where nobody liked her. 

 

“I’m so fucking stupid,” She said as she collected her purse and left. 

 

//

 

Amy was watching a documentary with her parents after Christmas dinner. The living room was still covered in wrapping paper, as they had been too caught up in conversation to clean up. Some of Amy’s unwrapped gifts sat under the tree: a new journal, some books, new clothes. She didn’t expect her phone to light up with a call, let alone a call from Molly Davidson. She quickly left the room, answering the phone. 

 

“Um, hello?” She said hesitantly. 

 

She heard Molly take in a sharp breath on the other line. She also thought she heard a seagull squawk in the distance, but decided it was her mind making sounds up. After a few seconds of silence, Amy got nervous and hung up the phone. Immediately, she began pacing around the hallway, typing out a text to Hope. 

 

 **A:** Molly called me.

 **H:** Oh shit...what’d she say?

 **A:** I hung up before she could say anything.

 **H:** Harsh lol

 **A:** Agh...I got scared and didn’t know what to do.

 **H:** Maybe you should call her back?

 **A:** …

 **H:** Do you not want to talk to her?

 **A:** Not really.

 **H:** I mean, that’s fair.

 **A:** What would she even have to say to me anyway?

 **H:** You would probably know if you didn’t hang up. Just sayin.

 **A:** Too late now.

 **H:** Not if you call her back.

 **A:** I feel like any conversation we might have over the phone won’t be good.

 **H:** Maybe talk to her when we get back to school?

 **A:** Maybe…

 **H:** It’s your decision.

 

Amy appreciated Hope’s input, but the idea of talking to Molly about anything outside of a stray question about class or an extracurricular made her want to throw up. The two girls had barely made direct eye contact with each other since Molly randomly decided that she was too good for Amy. And what if the call was an accident? What if Molly had butt-dialed her on accident, and she was making a big deal out of nothing? How embarrassing would it be if Molly wasn’t even aware that she had called the girl in the first place? All of the thoughts running through Amy’s head indicated that she should not engage with Molly at all and, instead, should avoid the girl like the plague.

 

//

 

New Years Eve found Amy comfortably situated in Hope’s lap on Annabelle’s couch. The two girls, Annabelle, Ryan, and Theo were all squished onto one couch while Nick and Tanner sat (equally as squashed) in the recliner across from them. Others sat on the floor and were standing around in the kitchen and hallway. The television was on, but nobody was really paying attention to it, as it was only ten o’clock. Everyone had been enjoying themselves, and it helped that Amy was just the right amount of tipsy. 

 

“How thin would you say the walls in this place are?” Hope asked Annabelle as she wrapped her arms around Amy’s waist. 

 

Annabelle’s eyes widened as she looked over at Hope, then at Amy. “Do not have sex on my bed, you fucks. Amy, I’m sorry. I know you want to redeem yourself from the backdoor incident but –”

 

“Do you tell her everything now?” Hope asked Amy, raising her eyebrows slightly. 

 

Amy ignored Hope and leaned over to place her hand over Annabelle’s mouth. “Shhh, let’s not talk about that so loudly, okay?”

 

“Do not have sex on _my_ bed. Do not have sex on my dad’s bed. I will literally murder you. Go to the bathroom and do it.”

 

Amy shook her head. “Lame.”

 

“Also, how have you guys not found an opportunity since you got back together?” Annabelle asked, furrowing her eyebrows. “Like, knowing Hope, I literally can’t believe you haven’t just fucked in the back of your car like normal teenagers.”

 

“My mom has been weirdly present the last couple of weeks,” Hope said. “Plus, you say that like hooking up with people in cars didn’t get you the worst nickname out of anybody in our class.”

 

“Well, now you officially don’t have my blessing unless you take it somewhere else,” Annabelle replied as the other two girls just laughed.

 

Amy leaned closer to whisper in Hope’s ear. “Wanna go to the bathroom?”

 

A small smirk appeared on Hope’s face as her eyebrows jumped up once again. “You sure?” She asked. “I was kinda joking before.”

 

“Kinda?”

 

“There’s always some truth behind humor, you know,” Hope said, stifling a laugh. 

 

Amy tilted her head to the side and scrunched up her nose as she looked at Hope. “Okay, dork.”

 

“You’re begging me to pull out the butthole jokes, aren’t you?” Hope asked, gently squeezing Amy’s sides as she pushed the girl off her lap and stood up. She grabbed the girl’s hand, pulling her up as well. 

 

“I’ll do it again on purpose if you keep bringing it up,” Amy said, laughing as she followed Hope down the hallway to the bathroom, grabbing the girl’s hand and intertwining their fingers as they walked. 

 

Hope banged on the door a few times, and after a minute or so, a scrawny looking guy followed by a timid girl departed from inside the bathroom. Hope made a face as the two girls entered, locking the door behind them. 

 

“Do you think they fucked on that?” Hope asked, pointing to the rug on the floor.

 

Amy stepped in front of the sink, but immediately stepped away when she looked into the basin. “Uh, I think she might’ve jerked him off into the sink, actually.” 

 

Hope glanced over Amy’s shoulder. “Jesus Christ,” She mumbled. “Straights have no subtlety whatsoever.” 

 

Amy chuckled. “At least it’s not on the rug,” She said as she let Hope pull her away and push her up against the opposite wall. 

 

Hope nodded, chuckling. “At least it’s not on the rug,” She repeated before leaning in and kissing the girl.

 

Amy grabbed a fistful of Hope’s jacket, pulling it off her shoulders and down the girl’s arms until it fell onto the floor. She grasped the hem of Hope’s t-shirt for a moment as she pulled away from the kiss, then slid her hands underneath, running her fingers across the girl’s skin.

 

“You sure you wanna do this here?” Hope asked as she absent-mindedly ran her fingers through Amy’s hair. 

 

Amy just shrugged. “What’s a more peak high school experience than hooking up in a bathroom at a party?” 

 

Hope chuckled and shook her head. “The novelty wears off faster than you think,” She replied, smirking down at the girl. 

 

“I don’t know,” Amy said, looking at the wall behind Hope, then back at the girl. “That painting of a sailboat really does it for me.”

 

“Shut up, nerd,” Hope murmured as she connected their lips again. 

 

Amy spoke in bursts each time they came out of the kiss for air. “One look…at that painting…and I just...cream my pants.” 

 

Amy giggled at her own joke as Hope rolled her eyes and pulled the girl in again for another kiss. After a moment, Amy slipped Hope some tongue, placing her hand on the back of the taller girl’s neck. She slowly moved her hands down to the hem of Hope’s t-shirt again, lifting it up as she broke away from the kiss. Hope raised her arms as the other girl pulled off her shirt and bit her lip. She managed to pull Amy onto the ground in one swift movement, making what would otherwise be an awkward transition seem graceful. Amy pulled away from the girl as she hovered over her. She immediately sat back to pull off her own t-shirt and then leaned back down to connect their lips again. Without thinking, Amy’s hands found their way to the other girl’s jeans, unbuttoning and unzipping them. 

 

“Okay,” Amy said, catching her breath as she pulled away from Hope. “Let’s try this again,” She mumbled, mostly to herself as she slid her hand into the girl’s underwear.

 

Hope inhaled softly as she felt Amy’s hand against her skin. “Here,” She said, placing her hand on top of Amy’s and guiding it to her clit. Amy’s cheeks were bright red, which Hope would have found endearing if she weren’t so turned on. She closed her eyes as she showed Amy the motion that she liked the best and pulled her hand away as the other girl got the hang of it. Hope placed her hand on Amy’s shoulder as the girl leaned down once again to kiss her. She let out a moan against Amy’s lips as the girl moved her fingers faster. “Fuck,” She mumbled.

 

She gasped when she felt Amy slip a finger inside her. “Pretty sure I got my geometry right on that one,” Amy whispered, chuckling as she kept her thumb on Hope’s clit, using her finger to stimulate the girl’s g-spot. Hope would have laughed if her mind wasn’t preoccupied with a million other sensations. She lifted her hips as she felt herself getting close. After a few moments, Hope threw her head back as she came, letting out a few shaky breaths. “Holy shit,” She whispered, looking up at Amy. 

 

“Was that good for you?” Amy asked, licking her lips as she raised her eyebrows, pulling her hand out of the girl’s pants.

 

Hope chuckled. “Yeah.” She nodded. “A lot better than good,” She said, running her fingers down Amy’s arms.

 

Amy nodded as a smile appeared on her face. “A lot better?” She asked before pecking the girl’s lips.

 

Hope nodded as she pushed the girl onto the rug, climbing on top of her. “Mhm,” She hummed. “Now it’s your turn.”

 

Amy giggled as Hope kissed down her neck. She ran her fingers through the taller girl’s hair, and suddenly there was a loud knock on the door. Hope rolled her eyes and turned to the door, yelling, “Go away!” The person knocking persisted. Hope got up and opened the door a crack. “What the fuck about the phrase ‘go away’ is so hard to–” She stopped talking when she realized who was standing in front of the door. “Oh shit,” She said. “Who invited you?” 

 

Molly’s eyes narrowed as she looked up at Hope, who was mostly hidden behind the door. “Listen, I just need to fucking pee, so whatever–”

 

“Is that Molly?” Amy asked, furrowing her eyebrows as she grabbed her shirt off the floor, pulling it back on. 

 

Molly raised an eyebrow at Hope when she heard Amy’s voice. “You have company?”

 

Amy gently pushed Hope out of the way, appearing at the door. Hope raised her eyebrows as she pulled her t-shirt back on and picked her jacket up off the floor. Amy stared at Molly through the cracked door, and Molly stared back. “Why are you here?” Amy asked, hoping that it sounded harsh. 

 

Molly looked down at her shoes, then back up at Amy. She could tell that the girl was mad at her because she was using her mean voice that wasn’t really all that mean because Amy didn’t have a mean bone in her body. “Amy, we need to talk.”

 

“Interesting timing because you didn’t want to talk to me at all for the last two months,” Amy raised her voice slightly as she pulled the door all the way open. Hope slipped past the two girls, giving Amy a reassuring shoulder squeeze. This was something she had to let them play out on their own. 

 

“I know,” Molly said. “I thought that I was doing the right thing for both of us.”

 

“What the fuck does that even mean, Molly?” 

 

The girl sighed and pushed past Amy, shutting the bathroom door behind them. “I thought that it would be good for us to spend some time on our own–”

 

“And you didn’t think about telling me that?” Amy asked, throwing her hands up in the air. 

 

“I guess I needed some time away from you, and I didn’t know how to do it right,” Molly said. 

 

Amy leaned back against the door. “Yeah, no shit.”

 

“I’m sorry, Amy,” Molly said. “I really am. I didn’t know what I was putting you through until–” She stopped herself mid-sentence and bit her lip.

 

“Until what?” 

 

“Until I broke up with Jared, and the first thing I thought was, ‘God, I have to call Amy.’ I sat on a fucking pier thinking it over for half an hour, and when I finally called, you hung up.” 

 

Amy looked down at her shoes. “You broke up with Jared?”

 

Molly closed the toilet lid and sat down, letting out a long sigh. “Yeah.” 

 

“Sucks.”

 

Molly shrugged. “I’m not that torn up about it.” 

 

“God, Molly, I can’t even talk to you right now,” Amy said. “Like, good for you, I guess? That you’re numb to any type of feeling?” 

 

Molly’s jaw dropped slightly. “I’m not numb,” She defended. 

 

“Oh, I’m sorry. I guess I’ll just give you two months to figure out an appropriate reaction to your break up with Jared. My bad.” Amy didn’t wait for Molly’s response before she turned to open the door. Hope and Annabelle, who had been standing outside and listening, nonchalantly leaned against each side of the doorway as Amy stormed out. Hope gave Annabelle a stern look and motioned her head toward Molly before she followed Amy down the hallway. 

 

Annabelle rolled her eyes and walked into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. “You okay, Davidson?”

 

Molly shook her head and looked over at Annabelle. “Why do you care?” She asked.

 

“Hey, I’m just trying to be a good person. Also, it’s my party, so you’re not allowed to be shitty to me, no matter how much you hate me.” 

 

Molly scoffed. Annabelle furrowed her eyebrows as she looked at the other girl. “Listen, Davidson, I get that you’re going through shit, but maybe the next time you try to apologize to someone, just own up to what you did.”

 

Molly’s eyes narrowed as she stood up, attempting to leave. “I don’t need your opinion.” Annabelle grabbed the girl’s shoulders, keeping her from leaving. 

 

“Oh my god. Do you not learn?” Annabelle asked, raising her voice. “The meaner you are to people, the more you push them away, Molly.” Both girls looked surprised at Annabelle’s use of the girl’s first name, but she continued after a short pause. “You can’t be stubborn anymore because it’s only going to make you feel worse.” 

 

Molly’s eyes widened as she looked at Annabelle. She had never seen that expression on the girl’s face before, and it almost looked like a mixture of despair and desire. She cleared her throat as she looked the girl up and down. “Why–I mean, why do you even care how I feel?”

 

Annabelle broke eye contact with Molly, letting out a frustrated sigh. She placed her hands on the girl’s face and leaned in, pressing her lips to Molly’s. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'm getting back into the swing of things when it comes to writing which is exciting for this fic as I feel like I haven't been doing my ideas justice lol. As always, feedback/constructive criticism/commentary is welcome, so let me know what you think! Thanks for reading!


	11. Apology Tour

“You _what_?” Hope asked, looking at Annabelle like the girl had two heads as they stood facing each other in Annabelle’s bedroom.

 

“I...kissed Davidson,” Annabelle mumbled as she crossed her arms over her chest. 

 

“I’m not surprised,” Amy said as she collapsed onto the bed between the two girls. “The tension between you guys has always been weirdly homoerotic.”

 

Hope scoffed. “I thought my concerned glance very clearly indicated that you should comfort her _not_ that you should shove your tongue down her throat.”

 

“I didn’t go into it thinking that was gonna be the outcome, okay?” Annabelle said as she began to pace the room. “She was just being so stupid.”

 

“And she really just ran off afterward?” Hope asked. Annabelle nodded. Hope whistled. “That’s not a good look for you, dude.”

 

“You’ve known her the longest,” Annabelle said, turning to Amy. “What should I do?”

 

Amy sighed as she looked up at Annabelle. The girl’s eyes were a hazel mixture of worry and distress. “Honestly, I would just let it be. She’ll eventually sort things out on her own and come to you.”

 

“Yeah, knowing Davidson, she’s probably just sitting in the parking lot feeling sorry for herself,” Hope threw into the conversation as she leaned against the windowsill. On the other side of the window, she could blatantly see Molly sitting in the parking lot feeling sorry for herself. 

 

Annabelle collapsed on the bed next to Amy. “This sucks.”

 

“Tell me about it,” Amy replied. 

 

Hope looked back at the two girls and inhaled deeply. “I think I’m gonna step out and get some air.”

 

“Do you want me to come with you?” Amy asked, propping herself up on her elbows as Hope moved to the doorway.

 

“No, that’s okay,” Hope said, giving the girl a reassuring smile. 

 

“Okay,” Amy said, giving the girl a small smile in return. “Don’t be too long.” Hope nodded as she disappeared from the doorway. 

 

The parking lot was essentially pitch black. A few lights along the side of the building illuminated the sidewalk, but everything more than five feet away from that was solid black. Molly had chosen to sit on the curb. 

 

“Doesn’t this kinda freak you out?” 

 

Molly jumped at the question as Hope appeared behind her. She placed her hand over her heart and closed her eyes when she realized who it was. “I thought only Gigi did that kind of shit,” She replied.

 

Hope chuckled as she sat down next to the girl. “Listen, Davidson, I’m not here to lecture you.”

 

“Sounds like something someone who has a whole lesson plan prepared would say,” Molly replied.

 

Hope rolled her eyes. “I’m not gonna bullshit you.”

 

“That’s fair,” Molly replied. Hope never failed to speak her mind when it came to the girl’s behavior. 

 

“I’m not even gonna get into the whole Annabelle thing because that’s something you two need to sort out on your own,” Hope said. “But how in the world did you fuck up apologizing to Amy?”

 

Molly scoffed. “She’s being unreasonable.”

 

“Is she?” Hope asked, raising her eyebrows at the girl. Molly looked over at Hope and sighed. 

 

“I’ve just been going through tons of shit recently, and she doesn’t get that all of that shit is part of the reason that we had a falling out in the first place,” Molly said.

 

“No, I think she definitely gets it.”

 

“Then why is she being like this?” Molly asked, frustration obvious in her voice as she clenched her fists.

 

“Davidson, stop being a fucking baby about it. All of the rest of us are going through shit too, and Amy’s shit originates with you.” Hope could see the gears churning in Molly’s brain as she struggled to find an argument against what the girl had said. The expressions that passed over Molly’s face ranged from irritated to disheartened to understanding to ashamed. Hope sighed. “You’ve given me a lot of advice about Amy, so let me help you out this time. She doesn’t want to hear your excuses. She wants you to give her a hug and tell her that you love her and admit that it wasn’t worth it. That’s all.”

 

With that, Hope stood up and brushed her pants off. “I think you’re a good person, Molly. You just need to start acting like it again.” 

 

//

 

Crockett was back to school not long after ringing in the New Year. A new semester brought new classes, and Amy made sure that she and Molly had as few of them together as possible. The only one she couldn’t get out of was Miss Fine’s first period English class. Amy had also limited her time after school as much as possible: she dropped debate entirely and the Student Council bylaws said that she only had to show up to one meeting per month to retain her position as treasurer. She had planned out a flawless semester. She was going to spend more time with Hope and work on getting a part in the Spring production of The Wizard of Oz. Essentially, she wanted to have as much fun as possible before she left for college. 

 

Molly was in her own world, as usual. She couldn’t stop thinking about everything that had happened with Amy at the party. Her confusion about Annabelle and her breakup with Jared just muddled her thinking even more. Upon their return to school, she found that even though she constantly caught both of them staring, neither could look her in the eye. She was rarely around Amy anymore, now that they only had one class together. She kept thinking about how Hope had said that she needed to start acting like a good person. She never really stopped to think about it at the time because she was too caught up in whatever exciting thing she was going to do next. She wondered if she had ever really been good to anyone at Crockett at all. On one of the first days back to school, she decided to make the rounds, apologizing to anyone who would listen. 

 

“George, I’m sorry I always make fun of theatre kids. I actually secretly love Cabaret,” She said, taking a befuddled George’s hands into her own for a moment before moving down the hallway, over to another set of lockers where the jocks were standing around. 

 

“Nick, I’m sorry I’ve always talked about you like you have no brain,” Molly said, leaning up against the locker next to his. Nick stopped taking books out of his bag and looked down at the girl. “And thank you for being my Vice President. I know I can be difficult to work with.” 

 

“Alright, Davidson,” Nick said as he watched Molly move down the hallway again. 

 

She stopped in front of Jared, who was leaning against the wall behind a set of lockers, praying that Molly wouldn’t come his way. “Jared,” She said. “The way I’ve treated you for the past couple of weeks has been so shitty, and I’m sorry. You’re an awesome guy, and I was lucky to get to know you the way that I did. Anyone would be lucky to date you.” 

 

Theo and Tanner turned the corner just as Molly moved on from Jared, and she grabbed both of their arms, stopping them in their tracks. “Guys, I’m sorry for all of the times I’ve called you stupid. Obviously you were just high.” The two guys looked at each other and burst into snickers as Molly freed them from her grasp. “I literally have never seen them not high,” She muttered to herself as she turned the corner. 

 

She spotted Ryan standing around and talking to some of the other skater kids, and she walked up to them. “Ryan, I’m sorry for that one time I called you a queerbaiting bitch after Amy walked in on you and Nick hooking up in the gender neutral bathroom. That was really not cool.”

 

“No hard feelings,” Ryan replied, shrugging with her classic laid back attitude. 

 

Molly nodded and kept going. She spotted Hope at the end of the hallway, and she could tell the girl was avoiding this situation at all costs. A week prior, Molly would have hunted Hope down like a bloodhound just to make herself feel better, but today, she just gave the girl an apologetic look and let her go. 

 

“Are you okay?” The familiar voice came out of nowhere.

 

Molly turned around to see Gigi hovering behind her. “Oh my god, Gigi,” Molly said, throwing her arms around the girl. “I’m so sorry for all the things I said about you before I really understood you. You’re only a little bit drugged up all the time, but that’s _you_ , and isn’t that all that matters?”

 

Gigi stroked Molly’s hair as the girls stood there for a few moments hugging. “Okay, I have to continue my apology tour,” Molly finally said, breaking away from her. As she broke away from the hug, she felt herself step back into a taller figure. 

 

“Ope, sorry Molly,” Principal Brown said as he sidestepped the girl after their brief collision, fully intending to keep his brisk pace down to the end of the hall. Molly cut in front of him before he could take another step. 

 

“Principal Brown,” Molly began. “I know we all make fun of you for being a little bit out there–”

 

“You do?” Principal Brown looked around at the other students in the hallway, who all turned away from the interaction in front of them. 

 

“But you have a hard job, and I want you to know that you’re appreciated. I can be a bit of a hardass sometimes, but it’s only because I care. I also don’t know who started the joke about you being an uber driver with string lights in your car, but I’m sorry on their behalf.” 

 

Principal Brown stood up a little straighter and messed with his tie. “Well, that means a lot coming from you, Molly,” He said. Then quietly added, “Is there any chance you have enough clout with any of these kids to squash that uber rumor?” 

 

Molly shook her head. “No way. It’s completely out there.” 

 

With that, she patted him on the shoulder and continued down the hallway. There was one person she was hoping to speak to in a more private setting. She ducked into the gender neutral bathroom, hoping to find the girl in there but had no luck. She wandered around for a few more minutes until it finally came to her where this certain person might be. 

 

Molly never stepped foot in the auditorium unless it was for a school assembly or a debate competition. Meaning, she avoided the Drama kids at all costs. To her, they were worse than annoying. Obnoxious, even. The way they constantly broke out into song and dance and quoted lines from famous plays turned her off completely. There was no subsection of the student body more pretentious than Drama kids, in Molly’s mind. But here she was: walking down an aisle in the middle of the auditorium, watching Annabelle sit on the edge of the stage, staring intently at her computer. The other girl didn’t look up until she was just a few feet away. Molly stopped in her tracks when Annabelle looked at her. Her eyes didn’t linger for long; they jumped back to her laptop, as if she were bored. “What do you want, Davidson?”

 

Molly figured that this is how Annabelle would act – like nothing had ever happened. “I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for calling you Triple A all this time. It was stupid.” 

 

Annabelle looked up again at Molly. She shut her laptop and placed it on the stage next to her. Molly took in a deep breath. The tension in the silence was palpable, and Molly was never good at letting a quiet room stay that way; she always had to make waves, to stir things up. She found it so hard to just let things be, but she waited for Annabelle’s response nonetheless. 

 

“That’s all you wanted to say?” Annabelle asked skeptically. 

 

Molly shook her head. “I didn’t think you liked me that way. I mean, I didn’t think you liked me at all.” Annabelle just shrugged. Molly sighed and walked over to the girl, leaning against the stage, next to her. “I hated you more than I hated anyone at this school.”

 

Annabelle chuckled. “Well, that’s fair.” 

 

“You were a huge bitch to me,” Molly said. “And you were the face of all these kids I despised because you all went out and partied, and had more fun than me, and you were beautiful. You were beautiful, and you could control guys by being that way. I was so jealous of you, but I mean, it was always more than that. I felt this visceral hatred toward you that sometimes felt unwarranted. I guess that was my little dig, though – calling you Triple A.”

 

Annabelle nodded and kicked her feet back and forth a few times as she looked down at her shoes. “I’m sorry about being such a bitch to you,” She said. “I know it doesn’t really help, but most of the time, I was actually thinking the opposite of what I was saying.” 

 

Molly laughed. “It does help a little bit,” She replied with a smile as she turned toward Annabelle. “Before I say what I’m about to say, I don’t want you to think that I don’t like you.”

 

Annabelle raised an eyebrow. “Pretty sure that you liking me in any way is still a bit of a foreign concept at this point, but go ahead.”

 

“I really, really have to get my shit together before I date anyone else,” Molly said. “But I do like you.”

 

Annabelle nodded. “Yeah, you’re off the deep end recently, Davidson.” 

Molly snorted, bumping her arm against the girl. “Shut up.” She looked over at the girl, who was just chuckling at her own joke. “I really do like you,” She said, placing her hand on Annabelle’s cheek. 

 

“I like you too,” Annabelle said, leaning into the girl’s hand. “I mean, obviously.” 

 

“Can I – I mean, just once?” 

 

Annabelle nodded as Molly leaned closer before connecting their lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Sorry that this update took so long. I'm getting a little bit busier recently, so the updates might take a little longer but don't think I've forgotten about this fic because I definitely haven't haha. I know this chapter is a little Molly-centric, but there will be more Amy/Hope in the next chapter for sure. I just wanted to do a little scene between Molly and Annabelle :) As always, comments/questions/suggestions/constructive criticisms are always welcome, so let me know what you think!


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